The popular hatred of feminism has grown to such an extent that even self-proclaimed feminists are abandoning the term. Alex Cranz, a feminist who runs a site called “fempop,” grew frustrated when she found that people were avoiding her site because she had explicitly labeled it a feminist site. Her tagline read “Pop Culture Through A Feminist Lens,” and although she felt it was an accurate description of the site, she encountered resistance from friends, particularly men, who said that it made them “uncomfortable,” and was too exclusive. They explained that feminism isn’t for everyone.
After some investigation, Cranz decided to make a change. Her article about it, titled “Feminism Isn’t the Problem; The Word Is,” documents her retreat from explicit feminism:
Feminism was, to these people, a moniker used by angry hairy-pitted activists who hated men, loved women too much, were physically incapable of humor and probably didn’t wear a bra.* It was a word intoned by activists. Not “real” people. I can only guess they still talked to me because I “wasn’t like a normal feminist” or something. It must have been all the dead rape baby jokes I used to tell in high school.**
Frustrated I went and whipped up a Tumblr, “You Might Be A Feminist.” It was a way of defining what feminism meant to me and other women and it was a very quick success, if moderate, success. But only with people already identifying themselves as feminists. It wasn’t changing anyone’s way of thinking or converting the Katy Perrys, Carla Bruni Sarkozys and Rooney Maras of the world. The people who NEEDED to see it weren’t. It started to feel a little masturbatory.
In February 2012, after yet another explanation from a well-meaning friend that the word was alienating to FemPop’s audience I snapped. I abruptly changed the logo and removed the word “feminism” from its prominent position on the website. I told myself it was an experiment I could later write about. I briefly even deluded myself into believing nothing would change.
Except there was a change, and it was so immediate and immense I actually thought I’d broken something on the website in my minor bit of rebranding.
I changed one word and suddenly visitors felt comfortable poking around. Nothing else changed on the site. There wasn’t a huge redesign and the clearly feminist title of the site didn’t change. I didn’t alter color schemes or suddenly post the best article in the history of the universe. It was still pop culture through a feminist lens–but with a little less feminism on the front page.
It disturbed me that my friends and family had been so correct. I set the knowledge aside a little too scared to write about it. Because there are implications. Feminism is a dirty word with the mainstream and that’s a little terrifying to me.
It’s funny how she describes calling oneself a feminist as “masturbatory.” Too true — for both the male and female variety.
The video of feminists showing their true colors in Toronto was important, but people have been getting the idea about feminists for quite some time now. Thanks in part to our efforts on this site and others. This has prompted rage on the part of feminists and their sycophants. Just the other day David Futrelle used search stats from some bestiality sites he’d been browsing in an attempt to prove that zoo porn is more popular than men’s rights. While I’m sure this is the case for Futrelle, it doesn’t matter all that much whether people are interested in men’s rights specifically so long as they get the message about feminism.
MRA is never going to be a broad-based, widely popular movement like feminism, because men are never going to be able to all get together in one big circle singing solidarity songs. We don’t do that kind of thing. At least not the normal men. But what men can do is get together and fight a common enemy, and that’s what we’ve been doing.
Being popular is far more important for women than for men, and that’s one of the weaknesses of feminism and strengths of MRA. In fact, as men, whether people think we are nice or not doesn’t even matter. All that matters is that we aren’t contemptible, sniveling weaklings. I know that really bothers some people, but those are just the cards we’ve been dealt. Men are hated most of all for their weaknesses.
Recently, I saw some feminists suggesting that the SPLC playing politics and siding with the feminists in their little “hate the haters” campaign against men must have crushed our souls. You know, that’s pretty funny. If I were a woman, I might feel that way, but as a man I just think “screw them.” I know, for example, that SPLC founder Morris Dees is widely hated where he lives in Alabama. Do you think Dees, rolling around in his luxury car or swimming in his private pool, gives a damn? Nah — he just thinks “screw them” and collects a check. Dees is loved by his liberal allies because he beats up on their enemies; not because he’s a nice, friendly fellow. Actually, from accounts I’ve read he’s a grade-A asshole who leaves “broken lives” in his wake. But he is a strong, resourceful, unintimidated man, and that’s what counts.
For women, however, it’s a different ball game. Women’s power rests largely on the public perception of femininity as inherently good. This perception is instinctive for men, who are programmed to see all sorts of goodness in women from birth. It’s an enormous source of power, but it isn’t guaranteed, hence women’s constant insecurity over what people think of them. For the most part, it is quite literally based upon the male concept of beauty. Men see beautiful women and this activates the “good” response in their brains. Men then immediately fall all over themselves to serve the woman in order to obtain some of this goodness.
But a few changes have come about. The “women good” perception can be severely damaged by certain things. First, men do not feel good when the woman they desire is screwing other men. It’s very distressing to them on an instinctive level, and today women are very promiscuous. Secondly, when women start acting like men (e.g. compete with them in careers), it also significantly erodes their appeal. Combine promiscuity with competition in the workplace, and women have really shot themselves in the foot. It’s like a reverse makeover where they come out looking uglier than when they went in, and this is leaving the obesity epidemic – the real elephant in the living room – out of the equation. To men, feminists have begun to epitomize all the worst things about contemporary females, and young women are starting to catch on and run very quickly away from the feminist label.
So, in order to beat the feminists, all we have to do is show them as the awful, nasty, unattractive, slutty and hateful people they are, and as women they instantly lose most of their appeal and power. Fortunately, they do a pretty good job of that themselves, so we just have to remind people from time to time, helpfully point out the terrible things they do and promote, and keep up the pressure.
If the feminists fight back with all they’ve got and get vicious, calling us names, smearing us personally, getting low-down and dirty and so on, we win. We win because while they may have some success in smearing us, they’ll come out with just as much filth on their faces, and it will look worse on them.
I suspect we’ll see them trying to drag more men in on their side as they get desperate, but it won’t be enough. Just look at the guy they had with them in Toronto — that’s the face of male feminism’s future: drug-addled street scum.
There’s only one way that the feminists can ultimately preserve their power. They have to adopt femininity again. They have to stop being sluts, stop trying to rule men in the workplace, and stop trying to match us on the battlefield. In short, they have to stop being feminists.