Sandra Tsingh Loh: Women’s Lib Created “Monsters”

by W.F. Price on September 28, 2012

Sandra Tsing Loh takes another look at the dissatisfaction that plagues the modern Western woman, and as usual comes to no useful conclusions, but makes interesting, insightful observations along the way.

The title, “The Weaker Sex,” suggests it’s another one of those “we’re better than men” pieces, but it really isn’t about that. In fact, her piece questions why women, despite having lives that approximate the 1950s patriarch, are so unsatisfied. She doesn’t resort to the typical accusation that men don’t do their fair share around the house, because, after all, in her circles the men do a lot. They spend a lot of time cooking, shopping, taking care of the kids, and other tasks.

However, for some reason, women can’t come home from work like Ward Cleaver and relax with slippers and a pipe.

I’ve written before that I suspect there’s something that bothers women on a sexual level about the role reversal, but Loh brings up another issue: a sense of ownership. It’s something I hadn’t thought of before, but it makes sense.

The gentle, almost Beatrix Potter–y images make me feel weepy; they actually draw a tear as I remember my own German grandmother—the homemade chicken soup with fresh-from-the-­garden parsley, the warm strawberry crumble cake in the afternoon on a rolling glass tray, the doilies on couch arms, the polished, chiming grandfather clock. And then there’s us: like Scarlett O’Hara, on our bellies in the dirt, wearing vinegar-scented T‑shirts, we raise our four-cup Pyrexes filled with sewage water!

Day by day in our frenetic, chaotic modern homes, how many of us become inexplicably unglued, suddenly losing our equilibrium in a disproportionate vale of anguish, as we open our refrigerator door (and what is that moisture our left foot is in—is it a puddle from the malfunctioning ice maker?) and confront the spillage from the leaking Ziploc bag or the microwave-deformed GladWare that forever will not close. On the one hand, these are a simple technical malfunction; on the other, they are another small but precise omen pointing to a world without the deep domestic comforts—and care, and arts—not of our mothers (many of whom were in a transitional leaving-home-to-go-to-work generation) but of our grandmothers, who still ruled the home with absolute power. No one is taking care of us! No one! And that is no small thing.

Having a salary – getting cash for your time – is a poor substitute for the feeling of having something of your own. Loh looks back to a time when women really owned the home, and misses it sorely. For men, I suspect feeling that you have a wife of your own, rather than one who divides her time between you and work, is probably sorely missed as well.

Today, however, more than ever our allegiance and our time is shared. Women are claimed as much by their jobs as they are by their families, and it appears to be causing them great psychic distress:

Further, not only do we 2012 women fail at being 1950s wives, we fail even more spectacularly at being 1950s husbands. In the Mad Men era, the archetypal dad came home; put down his briefcase; received pipe, Manhattan, roast beef, potatoes, key-lime pie; and was—­apparently—content. By contrast, dwelling in a grayscale midlife pur­gatory of grinding Pilates and ever-shifting diets (Atkins? Zone? South Beach?), if we breadwinning women were handed a Manhattan at the end of the day, we’d be likely to burst into tears and wail, “What’s THIS? What’s IN this? Why are you UNDERMINING me?!” We 21st-century female monsters are used to fussy bistros featuring spa cuisine and quinoa and dressing on the side. These husband-cooks whom Mundy lauds, however, want to make us some risotto (too carb­y) even while we are curled up in the fetal position, sucking in our ever-present pot­bellies (which the 1950s Dad didn’t worry about), dreaming desperately of a Manwich.

Was it really liberating for women to cast off their duty to the family, only to find themselves slaves to their jobs and a judgmental, critical world? Did it create empowered, confident new women, or a generation of emotionally torn wrecks who feel deeply disappointed with their lives?

if we listen to the women themselves, it definitely appears to be the latter.

{ 37 comments… read them below or add one }

Poiuyt September 28, 2012 at 12:46

Of course women’s lib created human monsters and social vermin:

The good female companion that used to be a wife, a mother or a lover over here, has by now lost her manners, her virtues, her charms and her graces.

The male/female relationship on which good posterity was once founded is now on a downward spiral to the bottom of human degradation from where it will not recover quickly.

But is it really the fault of women that they have here grown to be what they are, when all along, their men have goaded, abetted, suborned and encouraged their most debased and barbarous side ? That is, as a measure against other men.

Whom really is it, by gender, that validates these women and their behaviors, by official and by non-official means ?

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livingwell September 28, 2012 at 13:00

I for one have always welcomed women taking over in the workplace, and the military (sorry little girl, it’s yours now) as they are finding out…it sucks. Long hours at soul-killing jobs in dead corporations missing your kids events and taxed at at point where the drink(s) at the end of the day provide the only way to kill the “quit desperation.” Batted down by the Capitalist at work, and fleeced by the socialist on the way out the door, no thanks. I stopped this a few years ago, making a lot less money, but learning how to let go and allow the “ladies” their turn in the grinder. I love this new life. Simple, cheap, and always something new because I have the time to enjoy it. Let them work their ass off. Let them grab for all that “power” and watch the result. Be very, very careful what you wish for. You only have one go at this, and it’s a short one at that, and they have made a major blunder in their goals. Sorry.

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Ollie September 28, 2012 at 13:09

You should read the comments. Damn near everyone is tearing her (Tsing Loh) a new one, and there are 200+ comments and counting. It seems the “strong, empowered, victim” act is wearing very thin.

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Avenger September 28, 2012 at 13:12
dragnet September 28, 2012 at 13:13

Believe it or not, reading this just makes me sad. It seems so obvious that despite clear flaws with patriachal norms that the old system, on balance, was better for both genders and society more generally.

Women went from spending most of their time in the service of their families and an alpha who loved them will all his heart, to spending a good chunk of that time in the service of a cold, far more distant alpha who considers them almost entirely expendable. That’s why it’s not terribly surprising that many studies nowadays are finding large pluralities and even outright majorities of younger women wishing to become stay-at-home moms. Women have gotten a taste of disposability for the first time and they can’t handle it. And who can blame them? Disposability is hard even you’re built to handle it–just ask the guys.

And it didn’t have to be this way, really. In the 1950s the technology was already on its way that was going to pave the way for women to enter the workforce en masse (ie, birth control, houshold appliances, safe/cushy jobs, etc). Due to tech and medical advances, at some point women were going to be liberated from the home–feminism wasn’t really responsible for that. No, all feminists really accomplished was the destruction of gender polarity. But turns out the ladies need that to, 1) maintain attraction for their spouses, and 2) avoid experiencing male disposability.

And look what we have—an almighty mess.

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Avenger September 28, 2012 at 13:21

And Ward got plenty of sex too :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7AQkui_fcA

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Uncle Elmer September 28, 2012 at 13:25

I stopped reading after joining her for some white sangria and pesto hummus and hearing the professional lady’s anecdote about bitching at her husband for not changing the light bulb rather than doing it herself.

I would post a link to A Man Wants a Wife, Not a Co-Worker but am banned from commenting at the “Atlantic”.

Thing is, they are making a lot of money with this genre, and we are not.

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Anonymous September 28, 2012 at 13:36

“We 21st-century female monsters are used to fussy bistros featuring spa cuisine and quinoa and dressing on the side.”

Are we supposed to feel sorry for these bitches? I know I don’t.

Remember that feminists make a mess, yet even when they admit to making a mess, they still expect men to clean it up. I would love to see feminists clean up one of their own messes for once.

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Zorro September 28, 2012 at 13:53

It’s an election year, and the Atlantic is going to print numerous “Men Suck” pieces just to inflate the Democratic vote among women.

Women are morons. Liberal women particularly.

Suck it, bitches. You threw down. You suck the results.

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justaloser September 28, 2012 at 13:58

I like how women always live in the present. Women cannot see and adjust to the future. She talk about money like money will always exist , gas at the pump will always be easily available, food will always be cheap and plentiful.

Women cannot envision the possibility that eventually real useful skill will be needed such as vegetable gardening, raising urban chicken and rabbits, keeping your car going without new parts, making preserve,…

These kind of women are totally useless in difficult time and will probably be left on their own once the collapse passes the threshold point.

It is pretty obvious at this point that jobs are vanishing, specially the office cubicle jobs that women have: auto insurance seller, making spreadsheet, …

Sometimes I wonder if men have already accepted the fact and leaving the system behind because it is already dead.Men are lowering their life standard and waiting for the new system to start appearing whatever it might be.

Me personally, I could never let a women by head of household or of my relationship. Women lack the ability to adapt to ever life changing condition.

Never I will submit myself to the authority of someone that is incompetent being a women or a men. I really don’t work well with authority structure.

Women in general lack leadership abilities and should not be in charge of anything critical to the well being of human.

I am watching with great amusement the desperation of women as thing are crumbling down,

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Anonymous September 28, 2012 at 14:38

“Sandra Tsing Loh takes another look at the dissatisfaction that plagues the modern Western woman”

Do we really need any more examination of Western women’s dissatisfaction? Why don’t we sum it up in eight words:

“Western women will whine over anything and everything.”

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walking in hell September 28, 2012 at 14:52

If you read this article, you can really see the change in public opinion in the comments section. Ameriskanks are getting less and less sympathy, almost by the day.

I want to tell the guys here a true story that happened about five days ago. I was in a European city and a drunk, loud, obnoxious Ameriskank fell down and hit the back of her head on the curve. No one helped her. People just looked at her in disgust as she lay unconscious in the street. People asked me if I was going to help her because I speak English and am an American. My reply was “no way!”

Finally an ambulance came to get her ugly, fat ass off the street.

The lesson is this guys: turn your back on the Ameriskanks. Undo all the white knight programming and turn your back coldly on them. They are not human. Saying they are lower than animals is an insult to animals.

Walk away from Ameriskanks, and never look back. They are terrible women in a world that has many good, kind and beautiful women.

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Anonymous September 28, 2012 at 14:59

“a generation of emotionally torn wrecks who feel deeply disappointed with their lives”

Boo-hoo. I wouldn’t describe these women as the wrecks themselves, but rather the tornados or wrecking balls that wreck other people’s lives.

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externalangst September 28, 2012 at 15:07

‘Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way’

They should have listened to Pink Floyd

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Rebel September 28, 2012 at 15:52

An interesting article, but a little bit irrelevant, in my opinion.
We can’t undo what has been done: we can only move forward.

Maybe women are miserable and that’s unfortunate. But I have the general feeling that men are happier now. It’s about time men got a break.

Women are strong and independant now: they just are going to be that way forever. They will get used to it: this is no big deal.

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greyghost September 28, 2012 at 18:52

Now this article was a tell fellas. Lets make this article reality for the majority of women. with a little added something somethin. Make sure these women are childless and unmarried. With some activism and luck maybe we can get a male pill and then it is entirely involuntary for a woman to be childless.
Fuck them and BTW suicide is out doing car accidents as a cause of death. I’m waiting for the female rate in relation toi the male rate to look like college graduation 60/40 women/men. I also want the the old spinster “what is that smell” “I think there was an old woman with that cat that lives there” Yeah buddy bitch dies and nobody knows she is there until she decomposes and the odor gets out to annouce a death in the family. I want that story to have the same 60/40 ratio as the man relaesed from prison after 20 plus years story for a rape he was innocent of.
So don’t be alarmed if one you sees greyghost on a manginea site encouraging staying single and true to yourself for our young high school graduates and freshmen cock carouselers. “high five bitches, you don’t need some man to hold you back you have an education and credentials.”
Very good reconnaissance photograph Welmer Price.

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greyghost September 28, 2012 at 18:57

PS As an MRA I like the approach that greyghost guy has taken. You all should pay attention if you are serious about ending this madness and enjoying yourself.

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justeunperdant September 28, 2012 at 19:20

Just checking my new Gavatar, justaloser is now justeunperdant that is french translation for just a loser

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Ed September 28, 2012 at 21:08

Yes – and all those monsters are victims!

“The former Texas high school teacher jailed after being caught on tape having group sex with four of her own students — while a fifth filmed — now says that graphic video makes her a victim.
Brittni Colleps, a 28-year-old wife and mother of three, was convicted on 16 counts of having improper relationships with students in August and is currently serving a five-year jail term.”
- http://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime/jailed-texas-group-sex-teacher-brittni-colleps-i-victimized-video-article-1.1170856

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Cuban Guy September 28, 2012 at 22:20

Living in an urban area- I know the type too well. You’re better off finding a couple of like-minded buddies, and hang around chatting, joking, and saying anything that comes out of your head without fear of a harpy clampdown. Some women are only good for one thing- and most are good for absolutely NOTHING.

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Pirran September 28, 2012 at 22:21

@walking in hell @Ollie September 28, 2012 at 13:09

“You should read the comments. Damn near everyone is tearing her (Tsing Loh) a new one, and there are 200+ comments and counting. It seems the “strong, empowered, victim” act is wearing very thin”

This is becoming key now. Every time I see a whine-think piece in the Atlantic or the Times (or even, increasingly, on Slate), the comments are extraordinary. They overwhelm the victim chorus and demonstrate a development you wouldn’t have dreamed of as little as 5 years ago. Guys (and a fair number of women) keep pointing out that the Empress has no clothes; that the 50 something riot grrll is just deluded, not empowering. At some point, even the MSM might catch on.

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ActaNonVerba September 28, 2012 at 22:28

I WANT A PONY…I WANT A PONY….I WANT A PONY…I WANT A PONY..I WANT A PONY !!!

(gets pony)

IT’S TOO MUCH RESPONSIBILITY…..IT’S NOT FUN….IT’S TO HARD TO DEAL WITH !!!

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hisoj September 29, 2012 at 06:22

the sleep of reason produces feminists.

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imnobody September 29, 2012 at 08:05

@ActaNonVerba nailed it

Further, not only do we 2012 women fail at being 1950s wives, we fail even more spectacularly at being 1950s husbands.

Most women are always dissatisfied. I think this has evolutionary reasons. Women who were dissatisfied, made more demands from their men, so they got more resources for them and their kids. Their kids had more chances of survival so they passed their bitchy genes to their daughters.

If you are the dependent sex, it pays to be always dissatisfied with your man and with the things your man offers. Squeaky wheel gets the grease.

Women are slow learners. After forty years of feminist indoctrination, the brightest of them are starting to realize in a partial way that the so-called “patriarchy” was the better deal they could get. They pushed for more and they are getting less.

The patriarchy was the golden age for women, especially, the 1950s patriarchy. Doing a bit of household chores (with the help of appliances), caring for your children for five years (before they go to school) and after school hours in exchange of being economically supported forever. Great deal for women. Especially because women enjoy being with their children and being the queen of the home (and gossiping and watching TV). And they hate, hate, hate work (with passion).

But being dissatisfied beings by nature, women had not enough. They had this vague feeling of dissatisfaction: “the problem with no name”. Its name was: “being women”. Even if the world was perfect, women will never be satisfied. Feminists convinced them that their dissatisfaction stemmed from the fact that they were not cubicles drones and these evil, evil men were banning them from a paradise: the career lifestyle. This evil men were having all the fun in the office and were determined not to share this fun with women. The fact that men do not complain for slaving themselves to death didn’t help. Women thought that the lack of complain of behalf of men meant that work was completely rewarding. They projected their natures onto men.

So women considered that being with your children, with no schedule, in your beloved home was oppression. And the liberation was going to a office with a boss who doesn’t care a sh*t about you, only to have lots of pressure and demands.

Once I believed women were as intelligent as men. The fact that women were convinced of such nonsense is the better proof that women are kind of dim. No men would have believed this BS.

The fact that it has taken about forty years for women starting to realize this that is another proof.

Expect more and more articles longing for the dead patriarchy, as women realize how good have it then. As the saying goes: “Be careful what you wish for…”

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Anti Idiocy September 29, 2012 at 08:42

For another example of people overwhelmingly rejecting the whining of Ameriskanks, take a look at the comments after this article:
http://www.businessinsider.com/money-is-ruining-my-marriage-2012-9.

I LOVE seeing this.

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Highwasp September 29, 2012 at 11:48

test

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V10 September 29, 2012 at 21:40

@livingwell: “I for one have always welcomed women taking over in the workplace, and the military (sorry little girl, it’s yours now) as they are finding out…it sucks.”

I can’t help but wonder if that’s the next chapter of the feminist narrative, that the Evil Patriarchy, in a Machiavellian masterstroke, tricked them into trading the chains of the kitchen stove for the chains of the cubicle.

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Anti Idiocy September 30, 2012 at 07:16

“I can’t help but wonder if that’s the next chapter of the feminist narrative, that the Evil Patriarchy, in a Machiavellian masterstroke, tricked them into trading the chains of the kitchen stove for the chains of the cubicle.”

http://pjmedia.com/blog/men-the-gender-wars-are-over-—-we-won/?singlepage=true

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ActaNonVerba September 30, 2012 at 15:02

@Imnobody

Thanks.

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nugganu October 1, 2012 at 05:07

I’ve slowly been building a soft harem of Canadiskanks up here; women who will sleep with me but insist they do not want a boyfriend. I started this after numerous attempts at dating white western women and failing. I thus changed my tactic and targetex the urban feminist skank types, I just don’t talk politics with them, instead nodding in silent agreement.

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lavazza1891 October 1, 2012 at 05:58

I couldn’t get through the article, but I read some comments. My guess is that this woman is making up stories and friends adapted to make as many people as possible angry and abhorred. At least that’s my hope.

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Towgunner October 1, 2012 at 06:01

Actually, to be honest with everyone I really think feminism and “women on top” has peaked and is now declining. You can see this percolating in the ether with this article and others too. women won’t take over the workforce…they are realizing that work is actually work and not the “fulfilling” “career” that they were sold over the last 15 years. What we’ve seen here is a massive media-based cheer-leading exercise that encouraged women to be something they were not. Rah rah rah goes only so far especially when there is very little in return. For instance, all the undeserved diversity awards over the last 15 years given to women might have boosted their fragile self esteem, but now women are realizing those are just worthless pieces of paper.

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bruno October 1, 2012 at 06:50

Of course women will never quit complaining and wining and playing the victim role.

It is their strength.

They have already a ton of privileges, and discrimination against men is written in all laws, and cemented in our culture.

And they all got that because they are so successful in playing the victim.

Why would they ever give that up?

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Gamerp4 October 1, 2012 at 14:55

Aw…. That is cute But SUCK IT UP LADIES, 1950 is gone and now its the era of MGTOW and PUA’s (Excluding those who had snagged some beta dudes :D Stick with them ladies because you might not know what lurks after a divorce).

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Anonymous October 1, 2012 at 20:28

dragnet
Believe it or not, reading this just makes me sad. It seems so obvious that despite clear flaws with patriachal norms that the old system, on balance, was better for both genders and society more generally.

Not me. I want more articles like this. I want ten thousand like this. I want so many tears from aging feminists, we could float Andrea Dworkin’s bloated corpse on them down stream, and out to sea where the garbage scows dump their load. I want those fish to lie in their shrinking puddle in the blazing sun, as bicycles coast by.

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Common Monster October 6, 2012 at 14:30

As the local expert on monsters…

Day by day in our frenetic, chaotic modern homes, how many of us become inexplicably unglued, suddenly losing our equilibrium in a disproportionate vale of anguish, as we open our refrigerator door (and what is that moisture our left foot is in—is it a puddle from the malfunctioning ice maker?) and confront the spillage from the leaking Ziploc bag or the microwave-deformed GladWare that forever will not close.

I’ve never seen that silly stupid feminist revisionist history chick show Mad Men, but I’m old enough to remember approximately those years, and all the rage (literally) among housewives then was “having a nervous breakdown” — or threatening to.

Sounds like the same old song and dance, women holding everyone in the vicinity emotional hostage, like some sort of weird bio-weapon or dirty bomb.

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Anonymous May 25, 2014 at 22:42

Yeah, women’s lib! Yippee whahoo. Thank you for letting me do everything you had to do before and more! I get to cook, wash the dishes, and clean the clothes. Yay! What fun! Clean the house. Wahoo! Joy!! Watch the kids every moment while I hold the house together. No problemo!! Isn’t this awesome? Are you feeling it!!! Let me work full time and make even more money than you even though I’m paid less than my male counter parts for doing it better. Gotta love it or die!! This is awesome!. It’s the best. Yipee for me. Way to go girl!!

Thank God I can do that and keep it all together without murdering you in your sleep!

You work from home and pay half the bills. Yay you for having the same responsibilities that you had in college!!

You win!!!! Hurrah for guys. You totally win. Totally your world. You can have this shit.

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