Regret

by W.F. Price on June 26, 2012

Jessica Bennett, writing for the NY Times, reminisces about a marriage that could have been. Not willing to sacrifice her career, she postponed engagement while in her mid-20s, turning down her boyfriend’s proposal, only to change her mind around the age of 30.

We had talked about marriage. I knew we would get engaged eventually. He had asked about my ring size. Still, I was oblivious. I never thought this would happen so soon.

So, as he knelt beside me and reached into the bedside table, my heart pounded and my hands became sweaty. “Will you marry me?” he asked, taking out a ring that had been his grandmother’s.

I didn’t know what to do. Was this a momentary panic?

“Yes,” I said, terrified I had paused too long. I stuck out the wrong hand.

We were engaged for 20 minutes, until I mustered the courage to choke out, “What if I’m not ready?”

I loved him desperately. I knew, as much as I would ever know, that he was the one I wanted to be with. We balanced each other. I wanted to frame his dimples.

And yet the moment I saw that ring, I was terrified. I saw dirty dishes and suburbia, not lace-covered wedding gowns. Rather than thinking about the family we’d someday have, I saw the career I had hardly started as suddenly out of reach. The independence I had barely gained felt stifled. I couldn’t breathe.

Her boyfriend, still being a young, lovestruck man, overlooked the rejection… for a time. Ms. Bennett justified her decision to postpone nuptials by writing articles about how young, single women didn’t need it.

In 2010 she wrote an article downplaying the importance of the institution, and it seems she finally convinced her boyfriend:

I was working as a writer at Newsweek by then. One afternoon, a colleague and I sat at her desk and added up the number of weddings we had been to that summer (at least a dozen), the dollars we had spent on each (thousands) and how many we believed would last (maybe half).

A few data searches, some interviews and a pitch to an editor later, we were issuing a manifesto of our own. “I Don’t,” we would proclaim a few months later in a 2010 cover line in Newsweek: “The Case Against Marriage.”

Our argument took romance out of the equation. As we explained it, Americans were already waiting longer to marry, and fewer than ever believed in the “sanctity” of marriage. As urban working women in our 20s, we no longer needed marriage to survive — at least not financially. We weren’t religious, so we didn’t believe that unmarried cohabitation or even child-rearing was an issue.

But we were also cynical. As children of the divorce generation, we had watched cheating scandals proliferate in the news. We had given up on fairy tales, and we didn’t know how anybody could see the institution of marriage as anything but a farce. It was “broken,” one sociologist told me. So, what was the point?

“Happily ever after,” we proclaimed proudly, “doesn’t have to include ‘I do.’ ”

I told my boyfriend about the article, and he rolled his eyes. I assured him it wasn’t about us, but he said it didn’t matter. Over the years, he explained, I had convinced him that he didn’t believe in marriage, either. And so we carried on, partnered but not married, in love but not legally bound.

Finally, Bennett changed her mind. It seems to happen right at about this age for career women: around 30. What happens is that the balance changes. The male attention starts to fade a bit, the working lifestyle is no longer so glamorous and filled with potential. Suddenly, it kind of sucks to be single.

However, much to her dismay, Bennett’s boyfriend lost his enthusiasm. She counted on him to stick around for her, treating him as a sort of plan-B in case she didn’t meet someone better, and he finally figured that out. No man wants to be a woman’s plan-B — it’s humiliating.

When she saw the writing on the wall and started asking him about marriage, he blew it off:

THEN one day, in the most tired of clichés, I, too, started daydreaming about a wedding. I covered a gay wedding at City Hall, the day that same-sex marriage became legal in New York, and I cried as the couple read their vows. I began to wonder what he and I might wear, who would be there, and whether we’d write our own vows.

I brought the issue up tepidly, to feel him out. Lying in bed one night, I asked: “Do you still want to do it? Do you really not believe in it?”

“I’d marry you at City Hall,” he replied, then dropped it.

Another time, he threw my argument back at me: “Why do we need marriage? It’s only a piece of paper.”

And then I brought it up again as we were planning a summer vacation with his family. His was half Greek, and they had gone to the same Greek island since he was a boy. There was a little love boat there that people would take to sea to marry.

“Why don’t we get married there, on the love boat?” I asked.

He laughed. “We’d have to talk about it seriously.”

The boyfriend had finally started to stand up for himself. Perhaps he realized that he, too, had options. He felt he’d been strung along, and it was an insult to see her change her tune when she’d disparaged the idea of marriage. Maybe he thought her sudden interest in marriage smacked of desperation, and was at its heart just another self-centered move on Bennett’s part.

Nevertheless, he let her down easy, like most men do:

we re-signed our lease and decided to paint the apartment. We threw out our suitcases because they were taking up too much room. And then, in a moment of sweet insecurity, he told me he was worried he would always love me more than I loved him.

I assured him it wasn’t true.

A month later, he broke up with me, a half-hour before midnight, on New Year’s Eve. We were in Seattle for the holidays, just as we had been when he proposed six years before. There was no warning, no conversation. He simply told me he didn’t want to marry. He had never forgiven me for turning him down.

When we got back to New York, he packed up his stuff, quit his job, paid a final month’s rent and moved back to his hometown, 2,000 miles away.

In the end, we had no shared bank account or property. We didn’t have to go through a trial separation or mandatory counseling. We had spent seven years living in a 600-square-foot New York City apartment, inseparable and intertwined. Yet in the end, the relationship ended in one night. No discussion required.

Although it’s probably true that he loved her more than she loved him, as it’s pretty clear that Bennett loved herself above all others, what had really changed is that he had started to care about himself as well. Women have a way of teaching men how to do that. Use a man enough, and eventually his self-preservation instinct kicks in.

When I wrote an article telling women that they ought to start thinking seriously about marriage by at least 25 if they want to have a family, it provoked the ire of a lot of 20-something women. I thought it was pretty good advice, but the denial is so strong these days that a lot of women – like Jessica Bennett – are bound to find themselves staring right into the face of regret.

{ 189 comments… read them below or add one }

Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM) lzozozozozlzo (TM) June 26, 2012 at 11:29

What it comes down to is that women are terrible long-term planners and thus terrible investors.

For women do not operate in the realm of abstract, exalted ideals, but rather they operate in the realm of gina tingles and butt tingles. The ancients realized this in their Great Books and Classics which exalt Zeus, Moses, Jesus, and Thor over a woman’s butt tingles.

A woman’s greatest asset is her youth. With it, she can gain her way into an exalted mythology of wife and grandmother. But too, too many women waste it on pursuing the imediate gratifiction for their butt tingles and gina tingleszlzozlzolzozlzozo.

Then, they hit 30, and their tinglez tingl gina tinglalzizyzzizlz and butt tinglelzlzlelele aren’t so great anymore. But by the time she hits 30, her greatets asset is gone.

Today’s Bernanke elders smile upon this, as the depopulation of the responsible class is achieved. Ben Berannke rubs his hands and smiles, creates a few more debt-based dollars which men must some day pay off, and funds more feminist studies with it.

I wrote a poem for all the poor, deosuled, asscoked women with cats. I will share it soon.

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Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM) lzozozozozlzo (TM) June 26, 2012 at 11:31

Here is a little poem I wrote for Jessica Bennet:

“da professional womenz ode”

alpha fucks and beta bucks
dat is how we roll
da butthexting cockass we fucks and sucks
and in our anuthes it doth deosul
alpha fucks and beta bucks
it is da way of da fed
to transfer assetss to dose who butthext
cuckold dose who pay for our bread
beta bucks and alpha fucks
it’s what day teach us we;’re entitled too
da assetts from betas we plucks
after da alphas desol us through our hole for poo
lzozozlzzolzlzlzlz
cuckold da betas cockhold da alphas
datsz what day taught us in mba grad school
as da feiisnsits see no truth nor justice in their laws
and say da great books for menz was all fools.
yes, yes, i did very good on my gmats
dey bernenakifed my soul away, left me with cats

zlzlzzozozozo

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jynxi June 26, 2012 at 11:33

Lucky bastard! ):-)

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Huck Finn June 26, 2012 at 11:34

Bennet is an emotionally immature and self-absorbed woman. She is writing articles claiming insights and advice on life and marriage in a publication that gets a large readership? That is absurd and yet so is modern society.

Many men start waking up by their late 20s and seeing the realities of western societies and relationships, and how men are treated second-class in the West.

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AfOR June 26, 2012 at 11:34
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Veritas June 26, 2012 at 11:37

Good for him. Beta orbiter finally did something smart and kicked the self-centered bitch to the curb. Now, maybe, he can regain some self-esteem and, when and if he’s ready, settle down with a better woman.

Who knows, maybe he’s been reading MRA sites!

More of this stuff is happening by the day …. and the bitches have no one to blame but their miserable selves.

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Okrahead June 26, 2012 at 11:41

Poetic justice? Irony? In a pickle for being fickle? Now she’ll end up settling for a plan C who’s beta enough to take her. If, that is, she gets that lucky. I know schadenfreude is not a mark of good character, but cases like this certainly make it tempting.

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ahamkara June 26, 2012 at 11:41

Good for that guy. He dodged a bullet. I bet he is sitting on his front porch in his hometown thanking his lucky stars that this woman didn’t want to marry him. I’d be willing to bet he has a girlfriend who treats him ten times better than she ever did.

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Eric June 26, 2012 at 11:44

It’s a hopeful sign that this kind of thing is happening with more and more younger men. Hopefully, the guy will take a trip outside the country now and meet some real women.

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Zorro June 26, 2012 at 11:44

Case #356,241 of Princess Entitlement Complex presenting with a classic dose of Sex And the City Narcissism.

Stick a fork in this bitch’s ass. She’s done.

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Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM) lzozozozozlzo (TM) June 26, 2012 at 11:47

i luvs you allls o ye of little faith

to all the jessica bennets spinsters with cats
who teh fed tricked into spinsterhood/serving debt lxolllozlzl
who were allowed 2 let their feminine avarice
and tehir fmeinie lust get the better of them
for ye cannot have it all, womenz,
no matter what the berankifierz told ye
to all the fanboys in ther single mom’s basements
whose dads they never knew because the fed tookawy fatehrhood lzozlzl
to all the broken familes
who were split up by the need to make two salaries to feed the kids
to all aging necon womenz celeberating secretive tapings of butthex without teh girlths conthent lzozllzlzozlzl they tircked you too
to all the spinster chix again i am sorry they sdesouled you
in asscokcing sessins drugged you up on prozac
told you to abort your kids no wonder your’re d[pressed and all fucjked up no lozlzlzlzling here
my heart goes out to you while tucker max & goldman sax laugh zlzolzlzl
too all the aborted fetushes we ask for forgiveness we deserve not and to all those tricked into aborting the gift of life lzozllzllzl we forgive u too and pray for teh fethuses, but not in school as prayer is illegal in school lozlzllzlz
to all those inthe rising genertaion who will have to pay off their parents cultural and monetary debts lzozlz war isn’t fun but it’s part of teh fed’s fiat bubble cycle lzozlzllz so like after th e country goes bust the war starts in the ultimate pump and udmp scheme you thought enron/worldcom/fannae mae was bad lolzozlzlz just you wait lzozlzlll i hope not and ai pray for peace lozlzlz maybe we can all learn to live and get along but i think we would have to start with truth and nobility and honor and ocurage and virtue and not with fiat debt and butthex lozlzlzl that’s just nmy gues from reading heroduts and the great boooks and classis in greek and latin zlzolzllzlzl

and the bible too about sodom and gomorroah did yuknow taht sodomycame form sodom and gonnoreah came from gommroah? lzozllz kidding about that second one i doubt it did but maybe who knows i have never had eitehr sodomy nor gonorreah and i ahve never been to sodom nor gomoorrah

sodom must;ve been a funny place lzolzlozolllzzll and a crazy party or two and the editor in chiefstress priscilla painton at simon and schuster would have fit right in publishing tucker max’s books yah i betin gmorrah they had a tower of babel with the ofices of simon and schuster at the top across the hall form the fed lzozlzlzllzlzlzlzllzlzlz

sometimes i wonder if poets and prophets can still change the world?

or have they trainde too, too many women to hate, and dumbed down and drugged up too many menz? have they destoryed too many fathers and killed to many families? have the y deocnstructed tyoo many books and spilled too much blood and aborted too many fetuthes as one is one too many. have they prescribed ritalin to too many cretaive sols in chool in prozac to too many who need to be depressed and face it when they abort fetuses as god gave us feelings and makes us not pay attention to boring stae corproate teachers as all creativity comes from not paying attention to the state lzozlzzll and now it is diagnoses as a diseas lzozlzlz.

lozlzlzzlzl

well juust wanted to say i luv u all and nice 2 know ya and welcomes abords lzozlzl

and 2 asnwer my own above questions
let me jsut say
teh great books
wouldn’t be great
if they weren’t immortal
and they offer us redemption
the moment we start living by tehir ideasl
and epic higher stories
so put down your hate and your secretive butthex tape
and pick up a cross
and come follow me
and let me shoulderyour burden
for my yoke is light
dante wrote la vita nuova–the new life
and it is time 4 u to find your new life
for to loseth one’s old way is to fuind the new path
so do not fear
lozlzlzlzlzlz omg wtf am i saying lzozlzlz
i almost blew my cover here as teh messiah lzozlzllll i hide it beind all my lzozlzllzlzlzlzlzlzlles but a couple of you ahve caught on lzozlzlzlzllzlzl

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Donkey June 26, 2012 at 11:49

Comments are disabled. I wonder why.

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Anonymous age 70 June 26, 2012 at 11:54

Oh, man, I Love stories with a happy ending!!!

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Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM) lzozozozozlzo (TM) June 26, 2012 at 11:59

Bennet is the reason men are not getting married these days.

Simply put women are making marriage impossible by:

1. refusing to settle down
2. refusing to commit
3. changing their mind after they commit
4. taking a man’s children and assets after they commit
5. giving their gina and butthole freely in their youth, as they are desouled
6. after giving away their gina and butthole for free, trying to charge an enormous amount for it, after they are loose and gooey and oozing with stds
7. cheating on men as never before, before, during, and after “holy” matrimony

and then,
and then after all this,
women and their socon scheisters tell men to “man up”
and get married
to the dishonest, std-addld, bernankified, desouled, haggard, selfish tarts, who have been asscoked so many times that they are just waiting for a nice beta to lay their vengeful wrath upon, assoccking him in divorce sourt, so as to fund the asscocking sessions they were addicted to in college which no longer teches great books for men knowledge

zlzoozolzz

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Traveller June 26, 2012 at 12:00

I did not read the piece on that site.

So, just to be the devil’s advocate, it does not seem from the phrases you quoted she is feeling regret. For what we know, she could just be upset and blame men.

If she said something like “I did wrong” or “I should have accepted and tried to concile work and family” in that case, yes it is regret.

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Mr. J June 26, 2012 at 12:06

“male attention starts to fade a bit”

Thats MOST of the problem….Moron and idiot “males” who shower attention on whores because they either can’t tell the difference or don’t want to.

Its all about “getting laid” until that certain “something” changes…………….Morons…Their own worst enemies.

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Charles Martel June 26, 2012 at 12:10

Farking brilliant, Bill.

Every young man should learn about The Marriage Zone. When she’s still young enough and attractive enough. And you’re young enough and dumb enough and the hormones are running high enough.

Used to be that older women would counsel young women they should sacrifice now so he will bond and take care of you when you’re old. Now young women get the opposite advice, “slut it up, focus on your empowering career, you’ve all the time in the world!” What could possibly go wrong?

I’d like to write more but I need to go to work. Gotta put in a solid two or three hours.

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Brigadon June 26, 2012 at 12:19

Porn- for when you care enough to get the very best.

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Anon June 26, 2012 at 12:30

Girls are being advised to ‘whore it up’ earlier and earlier. When I dropped my son off at college last year, we passed a room in which the bunks were arranged (to maximize space) about four feet off the ground. A mother was in the room saying “yes, it’s efficient, but what happens when my daughter comes back to her room drunk at 2 in the morning? She’ll kill herself drying to climb up into that thing…”

After four years of this, with a useless liberal arts degree in their pocket, these women wander off to the big city where affirmative action (in its various forms) guarantees her a paycheck just like the one husbands brought home a generation ago, but given in exchange for no useful work.

In that context, I guess Jessica Bennett is right on target with her columns. Pity it took the boyfriend so long to get around to reading them and understanding what they meant.

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Georice81 June 26, 2012 at 12:32

They were both idiots. She certainly still is. Maybe he grew up and learned something. She is done. He isn’t. He still can get any woman. She can’t get any man.

Justice is served.

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Tom936 June 26, 2012 at 12:34

As children of the divorce generation, we had watched cheating scandals proliferate in the news. We had given up on fairy tales, and we didn t know how anybody could see the institution of marriage as anything but a farce. It was broken, one sociologist told me. So, what was the point?

Odd. Because it’s true that marriage is broken, but she’s very much like the people who broke it. I don’t know her writing so I won’t say she is one of those who broke it, but since she is a female mainstream journalist, it’s a good bet.

And its brokenness rebounded on her. Which is almost poetic, except that it happened because she correctly believed it was broken and hysterically believed that it was broken for women too. So she put herself in the same situation as MGTOW and received the very brokenmess she probably helped cause.

The irony abounds here.

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Anon June 26, 2012 at 12:38

“…I knew, as much as I would ever know, that he was the one I wanted to be with…
“And yet the moment I saw that ring, I was terrified. I saw dirty dishes and suburbia, not lace-covered wedding gowns. Rather than thinking about the family we’d someday have, I saw the career I had hardly started as suddenly out of reach. The independence I had barely gained felt stifled. I couldn’t breathe.”

Jesus. I just finished an article about how indulgent American parents have been raising self-absorbed, unhelpful children. Jessica, at age thirty, is obviously way out ahead of this curve…

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Rebel June 26, 2012 at 12:45

At first I thought it was a fairy tale. It’s the story of man who wanted to jump off a bridge but who was rescued by a generous soul.

Kudos to the lady for saving this man’s life.
Hats off to that man who opened up his eyes.

All is well that ends well.

If you have more stories like this one, we invite you to share them with us.

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Just1X June 26, 2012 at 12:55

She’s missed out on the lifetime posts that could have followed
“So, I got married”
“Marriage, great”
“Marriage meh…kids”
“Divorce”
“finding myself by ho’ing it up”
“cats and urine soaked knickers”

p.s.
best of luck to the guy. you dodged a magazine load of bullets

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greyghost June 26, 2012 at 12:57

Jessica Bennetts story is voluntary on her part at any time she still had a choice to make. when it was too late she decided to make the marriage choice when she had nothing to offer. I do see her story as tragic in that i will give it to her she didn’t openly sacrifice a father and child for her girl power. The next guy that comes along and wifes this bitch will get the 41 to 43 year old resingled heroic single mom treatment. He will most likely be the one that pays for this woman’s feminism.
Me as an MRA type I want this story to be involuntary and childless. I also want young women to see these story and live in fear of it happening to them. Welmer nailed it if a women isn’t married and being her husband helper and raising a family by 25 she is just booty call material. She is not a wife but will make for a good piece of side pussy (mistress) if she any social skills on how to be pleasing.
That male pill is going to be a mutha fucka if we get this story from this woman.

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Traveler June 26, 2012 at 13:17

Stringing him along for years was horribly cruel. She seems to not mind, but what if this rejection means he’ll have trust issues now…even if he manages to find a diamond in the rough? What she did was extremely selfish, she obviously thought he would stick arouund forever, just waiting for a little give on her part. How could she say she’s a responsible adult when she manipulates her partner like this? Absolutely pathetic.

Now, I’m one of those twenty something career girls who doesn’t want to marry or have kids. That is my choice, and if I’m disappointed later in life…well, sucks to be me then. But at the same time, that’s why I am very sincere with my “friend with benefits”. Both of us know it is only for fun/companionship and will never lead to anything. I would never be so arrogant and mean to date someone and expect them to wait for me to ‘changgenot my mind’.
At least if I screw up someones life, it’s only mine…

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gunner451 June 26, 2012 at 13:18

After googling her photo I can say without a doubt that at 30 she is way past her sell by date. Man, that gal is already hitting the wall hard and it’s all down hill from here. No wonder the guy bolted, she was an idiot for turning him down back then.

Had a similar situation with a gal that had turned down a marriage proposal when she was in her mid-20′s as she wanted to play the field for a few years. She turned 30 and started freaking out as she found out that the guy that proposed to her was getting married. She actually thought that the guy would hang around and wait for her while she went and screwed everything in sight. Now she complains that she can’t find any “good men” and wants kids as her bio-clock is going off. She’s Indian and while she had a hot body in her early 20′s it’s way past its prime now and the face is starting to hagify. Oh well I imagine she’ll find some poor beta schmuck to knock her up, mores the pity as all of these women seem to find some sucker even when they’ve hit the wall. Amazing what guys will put up with for a little pussy every once in a while.

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Ollie June 26, 2012 at 13:21

I sincerely hope that Ms. Jessica Bennett comes across this post. I doubt she ever will, so thoroughly cocooned in delusion as she is, but it would be fun to see the horrified look on her face when she comes face to face with an honest assessment of herself.

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Geography Bee Finalist himself June 26, 2012 at 13:25

Are we supposed to feel sorry for this cunt?

I’m not even going to play the AIR violin for her, and I know I’m not the only one.

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deti June 26, 2012 at 13:32

Fascinating. Welmer, your headline says it all. This is a tale of regret. Another reporter/journalist/career firster writes a tell all about her One That Got Away.

How many more of these Kate Bolick wannabes will women read about before they finally get it? Jessica Bennett got one shot. She missed it. She had a good man who loved her. She rejected him. He never got over it. He ended it when he figured out that his options were better than staying with a woman who rejected him.

It’s not even about schadenfreude either. It’s about her making a bad decision. It’s about her letting a good man get away. Hopefully some young woman will read her story and will not make the same mistake.

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AfOR June 26, 2012 at 13:40

Note that the guy in the story was smart enough to make a clean cut, zero warning and no more than dust in the wind 24 hours later.

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Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM) lzozozozozlzo (TM) June 26, 2012 at 13:47

i have made a thong for all of the jessica bennetts of the world who ask two questions when they hit 30:

http://www.cafepress.com/greatbooksformen.653757685

on the front it says, “where have all the good men gone?”

on the back it says, “& why is my butt sore?”

lzozozozozlzoz

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Szebran June 26, 2012 at 13:55

Her boyfriend dodged a bullet. No doubt his life is better because of it.

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Peter South June 26, 2012 at 14:00

No way she’s only 30.

How do some women age like that so quickly?

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poochmule June 26, 2012 at 14:00

No doubt, he would be saddled with child support and maybe alimony with 1 or 2 kids that he doesn’t get to see on a regular basis, expecting to have to work 10 years longer and wanting to die sooner than later!!

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Poiuyt June 26, 2012 at 14:01

It is better we stop romanticizing marriage altogether.

Marriage is a dying, dead and extinct basis for the engagement of human relationships, as far as these gender obsessed lands are concerned.

Indeed the social, moral, interpersonal and spiritual grounds on which marriage and all other male/female relationships once stood have been here so abused and exploited as to have fallen into obsolescence and desuetude.

Why would any man choose to be in close or prolonged proximity to a woman whom’s primary, secondary and tertiary grooming has been in hatred and bitterness towards males ? Its just not worth the effort.

The women of gendertopia have been sold the idea, that their inferiorities, inadequacies and short comings are the fault of discriminatory and chauvinist men. Yet they have also been schooled to believe and assert that wherever or whenever it is they, that have the superior aptitudes or talents [for example in child birthing or nurturing infants], then they are also owed compensations and restitutions for it.

No man through marriage, can ever hope to school a woman out of these self destructive ideas and self serving political postures. He is better off acquiring the children and family he craves via professional surrogates abroad, whom can be paid handsomely to deliver and to go.

The ideological and genderist laws are what they are, and absolutely no man can do anything about their mendacity. But what a man wanting a family can do, is to innovatively and thoroughly plan his future ahead, meticulously excluding all potentially malign persons or institutions from the onset.

It can be done.

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Eric June 26, 2012 at 14:13

When I first came to the MRM, I was depressed after a relationship where I’d gotten strung along just like that and dumped for thug for my trouble. After I started reading sites like the Spearhead, I came away thankful that I’d escaped with my scalp intact.

I won’t touch amerobitches with a ten-foot pole anymore. Like Greyghost says, they can wait till they’re 45 with three kids by three different thugs and give some Futrelle-type the kind of ‘woman he deserves’ LOL

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greyghost June 26, 2012 at 14:15

Looks like we all can see how lucky the boyfriend was. Just imagine if she had hostages (his kids) We need a male pill. As I said before her story is self inflicted The true end of feminism is when a man writes the script and hands it to an unworthy of marriage woman. Blood in the water shark fest. They will vote to have the womens vote repealed on that one.

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Andy June 26, 2012 at 14:19

And he will marry the first sweet younger girl he meets.

And Miss cat woman will be bitter to the end…hahaha.

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keyster June 26, 2012 at 14:45

I was him 20 years ago.
Her self-created drama of “regret” allows her to be a victim.
It’s almost as good as getting married, regretting it and asking for a divorce after a child or two. Then she’s a victim AND a hero!

So, as he knelt beside me and reached into the bedside table, my heart pounded and my hands became sweaty.

That’s the issue right there. Men need to start taking control of the moral decline of society by not succumbing to her sexual temptation. Used to be religion and women and society (supposedly) controlled men’s yearnings for poohtang. Now men need to climb upon the moral high ground and refuse to have sex with a prospective wife until they marry. The wise ancients got that one right. They knew.

Having sex with a woman out of wedlock is having sex with a whore. Say no, tell her you will not compromise on this position. If you’re still friends with her one year after meeting her and not having sex, she’s probably a wife and mother.

Pre-marital sex, whether in a religious context or not, ads to a greater chance of failure later. The chemicals released from sex deceives the mind. It’s not love. Love and lust are incongruent. One shouldn’t be confused with the other.

You don’t have sex with someone to consumate the bond. You bond with someone first, to consumate it later.

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crella June 26, 2012 at 14:46

Wow…those snarky articles on how marriage is unnecessary were written by women like this, based on their personal lives and feminist BS? Heeeeehhhh……

‘How do some women age like that so quickly?’

The drinking, and not taking care of their skin? Young women drink a LOT, and caring for their skin is playing into the hands of the Patriarchy (rolls eyes). End result, a helluva lot of haggard-looking women.

I was disgusted by her writing that she turned up at the hotel where her boyfriend was going to propose drunk and with her make-up smeared. This whole ‘you’ll love me no matter what I do’ attitude is totally unrealistic. No man wants to see his woman drunk every weekend; even in the closest of relationships decorum and manners, and dignity, are required. Then these drunk-every-chance-they-get women are surprised when no one wants to commit to them. It defies all logic.

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Tom Smith June 26, 2012 at 14:52

The deal is this. If a man marries an educated career climber like her, he will eventually have sex rationed, be told that kids will be had at her convenience, and disparaged if he doesn’t “contribute” enough financially and emotionally to the relationship.

Why bother. Jessica, you got what you deserved from your boyfriend. And you got what you wanted in your career- a spot at a top publication which have been filled by a man (who had a family to support).

Spare us your remorse- we don’t care. And is it any wonder why men do not want women like you????

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ce9999 June 26, 2012 at 15:03

The problem I have with Bennett’s story is there seems to be a distinct subtext that reads, “If we had gotten married back then, we would have split up at the exact same time anyway, except it would have been a divorce so it would have been oh so much more painful, so it was better that we never got married in the first place.”

I.e., her entire essay is an exercise in hamsterization.

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Notbuyingit June 26, 2012 at 15:11

Marriage is a dead institution for the most part Guy’s, look at relationships all around you or better yet look at marriage stats with thinking man’s approach fellow’s.!!

I believe we shouldn’t be mocking her in anyway shape or form Guy’s after all the ending was great for the guy!! Think about it Guy’s he really did dodge a full clip of bullet’s, (alimony, divorce,losing his children, years of recovery from self blaming) she did him a favour.

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Charles Martel June 26, 2012 at 15:16

Eric
When I first came to the MRM, I was depressed after a relationship where I’d gotten strung along just like that and dumped for thug for my trouble.

I’m sorry that happened to you. My guess is that’s an all too common story here. Many young men – early twenties – are consumed with idealistic love for young women while young women are generally in love with themselves and the endless (they think) attention they’re getting. The power differential is huge.

I had the pleasure of catching up with my version of your girl when I was in my early forties. Her life was an unbelievable train wreck. Never married, serious car accident (woman on woman), unemployed, mental problems, broke, turning tricks for groceries. And still delusional. In 20 years this woman had fallen from the upper middle class virtually into the underclass. She asked me for money and offered her body. I turned her down. It was very satisfying.

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Days of Broken Arrows June 26, 2012 at 15:19

This article, like the one the Atlantic ran a year ago, is actually a study in narcissism disguised as a regretful memoir.

The real purpose of such writing is for gals to up their value by saying, “Look at me, I’m so desirable men spend years wanting to marry me bus, alas, I pushed them away!”

The result from this will probably be a book deal and possible movie, so let’s be careful how much attention we give to people like Ms. Bennett. Because judging from her pics, which I also found, she would NOT be getting ANY attention in real life without her writing this sort of self-centered crap.

I’ve seen hotter fortysomethings who work at the grocery store. My lord.

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wrigrow June 26, 2012 at 15:21

Stupid whores.

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Art Vandelay June 26, 2012 at 15:50

Sounds to me like she didn’t really want a marriage, she only wanted a wedding?

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Thos. June 26, 2012 at 15:55

You may want install Askimet on this blog, Price. It’ll help you block that Good Books for Men clown and other spam.

Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 18 Thumb down 27
Theo P. June 26, 2012 at 16:01

An acquaintance of mine, of the “erudite stoner” type, once told me this story:

“I’d had a wild night on Saturday, so it was Sunday around noon when I was waiting at a bus stop in front of a Baptist church. Service got out before the bus came. The pastor was standing outside saying goodbye to everyone, and when that was over, my friend lit a cigarette, one of the congregants lit a cigar, and the pastor pulled out a pipe.
Then the pastor said, ‘You know what the difference between a cigarette, a cigar, and pipe is? A cigarette is like a whore. You get a few minutes of pleasure, and then you throw it in the trash. A cigar is like a New York girl. It lasts a little longer, but in the end, that butt goes in the trash just the same. Now, a pipe is like the girl you marry: treat it right and it’ll give you pleasure for years and years.’”

Smart man to throw out that cigar when it was done.

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Days of Broken Arrows June 26, 2012 at 16:25

Just a quick FYI to all the Googlers. There is a (married) Jessica Bennett from California who models and a Jessica Bennett who is a character on the soap “Passions” and is played by Danica Stewart.

These women are both pretty hot. But they’re not who you’re seeking.

The Jessica in question is associated in the Google photo search with The Daily Beast, an accurate description if there ever was one.

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Charles Martel June 26, 2012 at 16:29

Here she is. Scroll down. Busted Yugo is just around the corner.

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Rapscallion June 26, 2012 at 16:34

In her original Newsweek piece (arguing that marriage is a meaningless institution that no longer serves the needs of modern women) she wrote:

“Before we get into specifics, a caveat: check with us again in five years. We’re in our late 20s and early 30s, right around the time when biological clocks start ticking and whispers of “Why don’t you just settle down?” get louder.”

I wonder how loud that voice was whispering in her mind, even as she was furiously arguing the opposite?

just desserts.

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djc June 26, 2012 at 16:55

“I saw dirty dishes and suburbia, not lace-covered wedding gowns.”

Ha ha ha ha ha. What a horror movie. Women today truly don’t have a clue how much they have it made in the US do they? It’s astounding.

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Darryl X June 26, 2012 at 17:06

@ Zorro -

I wasn’t going to stick it in her ass.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 11 Thumb down 3
Darryl X June 26, 2012 at 17:28

@ Ollie -

Someone should send her the link. I’m sure she’ll appreciate the sentiments.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 9 Thumb down 1
JFinn June 26, 2012 at 17:32

Notice how dramatically she paints her worries when he proposes and how dismissive she is about his(“sweet insecurity.”) Good for the guy for dumping her. Her writings have probably sown a lot of doubt in his mind, and her future partners will probably feel the same way.

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Darryl X June 26, 2012 at 17:39

@ keyster -

“You don’t have sex with someone to consumate the bond. You bond with someone first, to consumate it later.”

I would have given this post a thousand thumbs up if I could.

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GT66 June 26, 2012 at 17:44

Just another self absorbed bimbo pimping out her silly, self-absorbed personal dramas to turn a buck. What a tool. My dog running his ass along the carpet shows more personal insight and wisdom than this bint.

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BobH June 26, 2012 at 17:50

Has anybody considered the possibility that the entire column is pure fiction and none of it actually happened, written to empathize with a bunch of 30-something female readers who really are in a similar position?

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My Cunt Is Wet With Fear June 26, 2012 at 17:52

Her blog is really annoying: http://equalitymyth.com/

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Uncle Elmer June 26, 2012 at 18:12

Sad story.

Off-topic but am traveling East to a convention of Dull Men. I still find time for my Forbes harem though. Lately they are obsessed with all things Facebook.

Facebook Update Status: 900 Million Subscribers, One Woman On Its Board

http://www.forbes.com/sites/connieguglielmo/2012/06/25/facebook-update-status-900-million-subscribers-one-woman-on-its-board

elmer :

If they had more women on the board they would prolly spend all their time updating their “Facebook” accounts, because women like to do that a lot. So it would hurt the bottom line.

Sheryl Sandberg Named To Facebook Board. Finally.

http://www.forbes.com/sites/meghancasserly/2012/06/25/sheryl-sandberg-named-to-facebook-board-finally

elmer :

Criminy you gals are obsessed with “Facebook”.

What are their capital assets, exactly? A room full of servers?

It’s not like they’re GM or some other manufacturing concern.

When The Boss Hits On You

http://www.forbes.com/sites/susanadams/2012/06/26/when-the-boss-hits-on-you-2

elmer :

Sexual Harassment is good business; for female co-workers, HR drones, and blood-sucking lawyers that is.

The rest of us are just trying to do our damn jobs.

Move Over, CEOs: Why The Second-In-Command May Be The Secret To Success

http://www.forbes.com/sites/alicegwalton/2012/06/26/move-over-ceos-why-the-second-in-command-may-be-the-secret-to-success

elmer :

Ya think he’s bangin’ her? See ForbesWoman : When the Boss Hits on You.

Sex, Lies and Suicide: What’s Wrong with the War on Sex Trafficking

http://www.forbes.com/sites/julieruvolo/2012/06/26/sex-lies-and-suicide-whats-wrong-with-the-war-on-sex-trafficking/

“Ann” has a suggestion :

The solution to sex trafficking and sex offenders as well as all dangerous violent criminals:
1. Castrate all sex offenders after the first conviction.
2. Repeat offenders should all be executed.

Criminals will never change their behavior, it is a fact. The only way to stop them is to eliminate them from society. 1 billion guns on the streets makes no one safe. Execute all the sex offenders, killers and dangerous violent criminals and everyone is safer.

elmer replies :

What if the offendors are women? Should we cauterize their vaginas and remove their ovaries? Because despite all the rhetoric about “sex-trafficking”of women there’s a growing problem of sex abuse at Women’s Day Spas that nobody wants to talk about.

The New Case for Women on Corporate Boards: New Perspectives, Increased Profits

http://www.forbes.com/sites/katetaylor/2012/06/26/the-new-case-for-women-on-corporate-boards-new-perspectives-increased-profits

After women spend three hours in the morning “putting on their face” they immediately gravitate to the aptly-named “Facebook”, so I don’t see how on earth making them part of the board of directors will increase profits.

Not only that, their competing male board members will take advantage of the situation while the gals are engrossed in updating Facebook.

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Leif June 26, 2012 at 18:22

This woman looks around 40, not 30. Not only does she look like she probably hit her prime 10 years ago, but she’s also living in NYC with inflated expectations of snagging some rich investment banker. Who of course would be impressed by her credentials as a…err…feminist blogger.

And how can any self-respecting man marry a woman who’s lived with a male acquaintance for 7 years? She’s used goods. Talk about sloppy seconds.

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Charles Martel June 26, 2012 at 18:41

BobH
Has anybody considered the possibility that the entire column is pure fiction and none of it actually happened, written to empathize with a bunch of 30-something female readers who really are in a similar position?

Crossed my mind. This woman has made a career out of writing trash. The article above could be anything between the literal truth and outright fiction.

I’m not religious and I’m not a prude, but more and more I think we’re out-Sodoming Gomorrah. Why would any man get married when this is what Jessica Bennett and her peers are thinking? Is Cheating the Secret to a Happy Marriage?

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YB June 26, 2012 at 18:44

@crella: “…even in the closest of relationships decorum and manners, and dignity, are required…”

You got it wrong, it should read: “…especially in the closest of relationships, decorum and manners and dignity are required…”

The problem with these women: they treat men badly as a matter of course. The problem with these men: they allow themselves to be treated badly instead of spanking her ass. Vicious cycle. The old adage: spare the rod and spoil the child. They have no discipline or respect, and are allowed to get away with it.

So they get used (I don’t often pass up a free fuck if it’s decent-looking) yet constantly passed-over as being completely non-marriageable-material. Until suddenly their “decent-looking” stage is gone and they get miserable and resentful and broken-up about it.

And then begins the wailing and the gnashing of teeth and the bitching about “where have the real men gone”, and “all men are pigs”, and “man-up and marry me”.

Slap of reality: The real men have found their decent girls, despite being distracted by you tramps. (I won’t say whores, because you gave it out for free.) All you have now as options are the men that don’t excite you, and who are now waking up to the fact that you’re just another sex-toy that has been hard-used.

Tough.

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Eric June 26, 2012 at 19:23

Martel:
These stories are very common over here. Another thing I remember, from one of the first Spearhead columns I ever read, was a thread where men were describing some of their experiences with women. There were like a 150 posts and every one of them sounded like a story that had either happened to me or to someone I knew. I was just ‘lurking’ at the time, but could have easily added a dozen more just off the top of my head.

The only time I’ve ever actually enjoyed interacting with women was when I was in Latin America. The differences between the women here and elsewhere is stark. That was another eye-opener.

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Eric June 26, 2012 at 19:27

Peter South:
This is another strange phenomenon. Anglo-American women do seem to age a lot less gracefully than their foreign counterparts. A friend of mine has a Lebanese wife—they’ve been married for 25 years and Ms. Jessica looks older than his wife does.

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andybob June 26, 2012 at 19:28

In a ‘Newsweek’ article about (cringe) workplace discrimination against women, Jessica Bennet wrote this:

“Somewhere along the road to equality, young women like us lost their voices. So when we marched into the workforce and the fog of subtle gender discrimination, it was baffling and alien. Without a movement behind us, we had neither the language to describe it nor the confidence to call it what it was.”

Lost their “voices”? Is she fucking kidding? We are bombarded by their endless whinging about everything from imaginary workplace discrimination (sob) to how much they regret mismanaging their relationships (double plus sob). Princess has a megaphone that reaches millions of people who have to hear how sad she is that she lost the grip on the whip she wielded over her boyfriend. And she proclaims (to millions of people) that she doesn’t have a voice.

Does Ms Bennet expect me to be heartbroken at how ‘baffling and alien’ it was for her when walking into her workplace for the first time? She interprets her feelings of bafflement as evidence of gender discrimination. She claims that she couldn’t identify this discrimination, not because it didn’t exist, but because it was ‘subtle’, ‘hidden in ‘fog’. She didn’t have the ‘confidence’ or the ‘language to describe it’. Funny, I can’t describe something that doesn’t exist either.

Ms Bennet claims:
“The sad truth is that when we do see women rise to the top, we wonder: was it purely their abilities, or did it have something to do with their looks?”

The person most likely to raise that question is an envious female colleague. Ever taken a gander at some of the brittle battleaxes who barge their way onto the AA elavator? I wouldn’t cite their looks as their greatest assets. Uncle Elmer, would probably know better than me. Please chime in, good sir.

My favourite line from Ms Bennet:
” In a highly sexualized, post-PC world, navigating gender roles at work is more confusing than ever. ”

You’re confused (as well as baffled and alienated) by the sexual politics of your workplace, are you? Allow me to simplify things. You have a vagina, so you can say or do almost anything you like – with total impunity. That includes destroying the lives and careers of any person who doesn’t have a vagina. If you are caught in a lie, then you can claim to be ‘baffled’, ‘alienated’ and ‘confused’ – that’s if you can manage to find your voice.

The half-Greek guy didn’t need a voice at all. His actions spoke louder than words. He put 2000 miles between himself and this deluded creature. ‘Nuff said, buddy.

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X7 June 26, 2012 at 19:31

OT: The ultimate in equality of the sexes as women join in annual Los Angeles BEARD championships

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2164331/LA-Beard-Moustache-Championships-2012-Equality-sexes-women-join-contest.html#ixzz1yxORYjQp

How pathetic is this?

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shmiggen June 26, 2012 at 19:41

I’m really digging these thoughtful essays, Welmer. Keep em comin’.

Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 20 Thumb down 0
Eric June 26, 2012 at 19:56

Andybob:
That’s another interesting side to the story. Ms. Jessica, being a ‘successful career woman’ should theoretically be able to bounce back from a broken relationship fairly easily. But instead, she lashes out publically about the one man who didn’t bow down to her sense of entitlement. I think what’s really going on here. It’s like you were saying on another thread about how these entitlement queens can’t even stand the fact that gay men reject them. They have to feel superior to the man at all costs.

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walking in hell June 26, 2012 at 19:58

@ keyster

Great post keyster.

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walking in hell June 26, 2012 at 20:02

I read this post and my eyes are tearing up. I am so jealous for the man. God must really love him, to save him from such a horrible fate.

I often feel that I am cursed by God because I got married and had a child (through no fault of his own). To this day I often think that my ex-wife was not sent by God, but by Satan. Seriously.

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Natália June 26, 2012 at 20:07

“When I wrote an article telling women that they ought to start thinking seriously about marriage by at least 25 if they want to have a family, it provoked the ire of a lot of 20-something women.”
Since I was 18 my grandmother tells me I should start thinking about marriage :) I take grandma’s advice seriously, after all she does have more experience than I do.

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Huck Finn June 26, 2012 at 20:26

“Somewhere along the road to equality, young women like us lost their voices.”

If only we we could be so lucky since the peace and quiet would be really nice. Women will, as a group, never be happy or fulfilled. They are the eternal whining spoiled child. Women are generally delusional, irrational, and unrealistic. Science-fiction stories are sometimes more real.

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walking in hell June 26, 2012 at 20:34

Guys,

I just read this article on the NY Times. Anything from the NY Times should always be suspected as state sponsored propaganda. It looks like a pure propaganda piece to me. This is the conclusion of the article:

” When he was packing his stuff, I remembered a conversation my Newsweek co-author had had with her mother about our article. “I’ll tell you why you need marriage,” she told her. “Because it makes it harder for the other person to leave.”

At the time, we snickered at her words. Legally requiring someone to stick around? It was desperate, pathetic. ”

Remember guys, as the number of “legal” marriages goes down and the birthrate goes down, several things happen:

1) The number of divorces go down, and with it the amount of money divorce lawyers and judges make.
2) The number of taxable bodies goes down in the form of new children.–the tax base shrinks.
3) The amount of child support goes down, and with it the amount of money the state agencies make.

Feminism was designed to increase the tax base by adding women to the work place. But the long-term effects of feminism are just the opposite.

Feminism is an economic disaster for our elites–for the wealthy families who collect taxes, for the judges and lawyers who make money from divorce, for the state agencies who make money from child support.

I would expect lots of 30ish women to begin putting pressure on men to get married after reading this article, thus creating more potential divorce revenues and possibly more tax slave children.

Check out this other article from the UK:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2137070/At-A-judge-fights-marriage-Senior-family-court-judge-campaigns-break-Britains-divorce-addiction.html

This propaganda piece is doing nothing more than promoting “legal” marriage so that there will continue to be divorces that feed this judge and his carrion eating lawyer buddies. The divorce judge has brilliantly been cast as the savior of marriage. Talk about double speak!

For the future, you can expect a strong propaganda push for “legal” marriage. You can expect NO push against “legal” divorce.

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Paul Murray June 26, 2012 at 20:46

A sad story. Dude spent ten years of his life in the city, and on this girl. Eventually gave up. I hope he built some savings – there’s nothing else worthwhile he is taking home.

“There was no warning, no conversation. He simply told me he didn’t want to marry. He had never forgiven me for turning him down.”

Women do not understand – or choose not to believe – that men feel deeply. The old saying is “Women forgive, but don’t forget. Men forget, but don’t forgive.” It comes from being slow to judge, from taking people as you find them. After doing that, when you finally do form a judgement, you trust it.

This person showed her colours. He was not fooled twice. Well done, that guy. It would have been better if he’d left her and found a decent woman, but there aren’t many of those to pick from, in the Big City.

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JFinn June 26, 2012 at 20:55

“Her blog is really annoying: http://equalitymyth.com/

Her blog is flooded with false caricaturistic statistics, bigotry, and paranoid conspiracy theories.

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Lord Simon June 26, 2012 at 21:03

Off topic.
This is how young men feel about the world today.
http://youtu.be/VIuU1enG5eY

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 4 Thumb down 0
The Whammer June 26, 2012 at 21:19

I’d give her advice but Herrick said it better in the 1600′s

Gather ye rosebuds while ye may,
Old Time is still a-flying:
And this same flower that smiles to-day
To-morrow will be dying.

The glorious lamp of heaven, the sun,
The higher he’s a-getting,
The sooner will his race be run,
And nearer he’s to setting.

That age is best which is the first,
When youth and blood are warmer;
But being spent, the worse, and worst
Times still succeed the former.

Then be not coy, but use your time,
And while ye may, go marry:
For having lost but once your prime,
You may for ever tarry.

And btw, Robert Herrick was a bachelor and died at the age of 83. Henry VIII and Shakespeare, both married men, died at 52. Still think married men live longer? That’s bullshit and disinformation put out there by females. Most men with illnesses and disabilities don’t marry so of course their life span is shorter. But even most disabled females somehow manage to marry.
You may find this amusing:
http://www.forces.org/evidence/hamilton/other/oldest.htm

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W.F. Price June 26, 2012 at 22:09

I’d give her advice but Herrick said it better in the 1600′s

-TW

Of course. Can’t believe I forgot about that one when I wrote the original “wasting time” post…

evilwhitemalempire June 26, 2012 at 22:14

What happens is that the balance changes. The male attention starts to fade a bit, the working lifestyle is no longer so glamorous and filled with potential.
——————–
that’s because loosing their looks means actually having to work at their job

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evilwhitemalempire June 26, 2012 at 22:37

when i think about the whole feminists teaching girls to not get married till it’s too late thing i find myself revisiting the depopulation agenda theory of feminism

i mean it used to be the girl that wanted to get married and the guy that was allergic to the idea

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Douchie McDouche June 26, 2012 at 22:51

They don’t call it the New York Slimes for nothing you know!

What a tragedy that their relationship ended.

Not!

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 12 Thumb down 1
Charles Martel June 26, 2012 at 22:53

Perhaps it’s not too late to point out that at the seven year mark in a relationship or marriage you’ve already had 98% of the sex you’re ever going to have with that woman and 200% of the pleasure. (200%? The pleasure goes negative, eventually bringing you back to the 100% mark).

Mr. half-Greek got very lucky.

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Observer June 26, 2012 at 22:57

There’s no shame in losing physical beauty. Everyone has that happen to them. If they don’t have a winning personality by the time that happens though, they’ll find people aren’t as magically drawn to them.

This lady seems to be experiencing what it’s like to be on the other side of rejection. Instead of honestly dealing with her mistake, she ends her article pondering how it might have been “harder for the other person to leave” had they been married. That’s pretty revolting.

It’s like we’re stuck in the first few paragraphs of Kafka’s Metamorphosis were Gregor tries to go back to sleep after finding he has turned into an insect. These ladies know what they’ve become but insist on falling back into their useless ideologies in hopes that they’ll magically get a better deal.

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walking in hell June 27, 2012 at 00:40

Hi guys,

I don’t think I shared this yet.

Introducing Pastor Nicole Crank. Nicole represents the future of American Christianity. In this sermon titled “Damaged Goods,” Nicole talks about her “not so sweet” past. Nicole is one of the girls who didn’t let her man get away. I only hope her husband discovers the-spearhead when Pastor Nicole delivers her “I have sinned” speech.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v_F-7IJIkVI

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Opus June 27, 2012 at 03:18

I thought The Boyfriend (mini-marriage) had gone the way of the Dodo to replaced by Hook-Up?

She’s only thirty (so she says) so what on earth is she complaining about? I don’t fancy that asymetrical face of hers, but you can be sure there will be no shortage of guys willing to step up to the plate.

I think we fall for female rhetoric if we buy into the idea that life is more or less over for women should they not be married by thirty. Those are merely crocodile tears she is shedding. After all, at the end of the day you can only sleep with one person or be married to one person at a time. You only need one guy and I am sure NYC has at least one single man who’s fancy her.

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andybob June 27, 2012 at 03:20

“I wanted to frame his dimples.” Jessica Bennet

Indeed. She’s as nutty as a bucket of brittle. Yet, she still manages, as Mr Eric astutely points out, to exact revenge on her ex-capee by spreading details about his private business. After a decade-long relationship, everyone in this man’s life – family, friends, colleagues – knows that he is the man that she is writing about. She even refers to his ethnicity, just to ensure they identify the right guy.

Ms Bennet knows that she doesn’t need to outright condemn this man because all of her female readers, including the women in his orbit, will do that for her. She is counting on Team Vagina to humiliate him by proxy. How many women have already pointed to him as he walks down the street and sneered to each other:
“There’s that mysoginistic bastard who dumped that poor woman after all those years. What a prick!.”
“She doesn’t even criticise him. She’s too good for him. Aren’t we all?”

Mr Eric is correct. Her article was an act of spiteful revenge – a multi-media broadside cleverly disgised as humble self-reproach. Just reading a smattering of her journals makes it clear that she’s all about blaming and shaming men. Her work is heavily under-scored with the assumption that her readership is totally OK with that. What a shock.

Her by-line photo glares accusingly at us with the same set-jawed arrogance that Mr half-Greek guy woke up to one day in broad daylight. He wisely scarpered. Neither she, nor her female readership, will learn a thing from this experience. They’ll just wail even more deafeningly about their self-inficted woes – and not having voices, of course.

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DCM June 27, 2012 at 03:32

I sure she comes here and reads the comments.

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Darryl X June 27, 2012 at 03:51

@ andybob -

Wow that was really well-written.

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anonymous June 27, 2012 at 03:57

This article, as someone in comments above noted, suggests regret of not forcing a man to finance her wedding-day princess fantasy.

Still, I knew he was the one, or at least I thought he was. He had moved across the country for me. He was funny and spontaneous. He wore his heart on his sleeve. If I ever were to marry, I imagined it would be him. But I wasn’t the type of girl to fantasize about “happily ever after.”
“Unlike me who camouflaged my disdain for marriage, he was upfront with his idea of marriage.”

I should have. We had talked about marriage. I knew we would get engaged eventually. He had asked about my ring size. Still, I was oblivious. I never thought this would happen so soon.
“See? The only thing I did not know about his intentions was the timing of the proposal.”

And yet the moment I saw that ring, I was terrified. I saw dirty dishes and suburbia, not lace-covered wedding gowns. Rather than thinking about the family we’d someday have, I saw the career I had hardly started as suddenly out of reach. The independence I had barely gained felt stifled. I couldn’t breathe.
“I was foolish to think about life beyond the wedding-day. He caught me off-guard.”

There were plenty of times over the next six years that I wished I had said yes. We could have had a long engagement, I told myself. In a few years, I would have been ready.
“If I was alert, I would have just played along with a phony ‘yes’, until the day I crave for wedding”

Besides, we had outlasted a lot of married couples. Why did we need a piece of paper to prove we were committed?
In fact, what was the difference between our staying together with or without the label of ‘marriage’? We actually lived together longer than my friends who acted to accept marriage proposal from their boyfriends.”

And then we entered an age in which we were engulfed by other people’s weddings. My credit cards were maxed from bridesmaids’ dresses and shower gifts, and our refrigerator was covered with “Save the Date” cards.
“My wake-up call was the flurry of weddings I had to participate. Seeing how the bride gets to choose her wedding dress and the rain of gifts she gets, it was a drama I distanced myself from through my own naiveté”

But instead of becoming teary eyed as one friend after another proclaimed “I do,”… I became obsessed with justifying my decision.
“I could also shed crocodile-tears of joy, yet I clung to rationalize refusing marriage.”

I was working as a writer at Newsweek by then. One afternoon, a colleague and I sat at her desk and added up the number of weddings we had been to that summer (at least a dozen), the dollars we had spent on each (thousands) and how many we believed would last (maybe half).
“I contributed a lot of money to other people’s wedding. Everyone knew at least half of the brides did not take marriage seriously. All they wanted was the lulz of wedding…I could have been one of them. Why did I take marriage seriously?”

THEN one day, in the most tired of clichés, I, too, started daydreaming about a wedding. I covered a gay wedding at City Hall, the day that same-sex marriage became legal in New York, and I cried as the couple read their vows. I began to wonder what he and I might wear, who would be there, and whether we’d write our own vows.
“This was the straw that broke the camel. I became obsessed with marriage wedding.

In the end, we had no shared bank account or property. We didn’t have to go through a trial separation or mandatory counseling. We had spent seven years living in a 600-square-foot New York City apartment, inseparable and intertwined. Yet in the end, the relationship ended in one night. No discussion required.
“Right. We broke up. No. We divorced, but without taking him to cleaners. No divorce court was involved because we did not have that much common property. I could not pursue alimony because he quit his job. If anything, it would have been me who had to pay him. All of this loss because I did not say a mere “yes” to his proposal.

When he was packing his stuff, I remembered a conversation my Newsweek co-author had had with her mother about our article. “I’ll tell you why you need marriage,” she told her. “Because it makes it harder for the other person to leave.”
“If I had said a dishonest ‘yes’, he would not have left me that easily. He would have been on hook. He left me after enjoying all the perks of marriage, but without suffering the bitter end of divorce process. He can move on from me without any encumbrance. Yuck! Gals, never, never, never, never, ever let your prey walk unscathed as I did. Marriage is there not for the fairy tales of living together, let alone being happy. Marriage is there for you to fulfill your princess fantasy in a grandiose wedding. As an icing, you get a hefty payday when you check out a few months, may be a year or two after the big day. Marriage has got nothing to do with doing dishes, losing your freedom or any sacrifice on your part. He is the sacrificial lamb on the alter of marriage. Don’t repeat my mistake of refusing wedding just because of fearing marriage. Go for it!”

There.

A drunken interpretation of the article written by a strong and independent woman.

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interested June 27, 2012 at 04:04

Here we have a woman in a position to influence her peers. She was given a nice pulpit to espouse her not so worldly views on marriage when she was 25. She co writes “I Don’t”.

But a mere five years or so later she pens this article and ends it with the following:

“But would it have worked? I’ll never know. What I have learned is this: While “happily ever after” may indeed be a farce, there’s something to be said for uttering “I do.”

Here’s a little something to contemplate. How many young women out there read her “I Don’t” manifesto and dumped some guy or turned down a marriage proposal because they bought into her nonsense?

How many of those now older ladies now read her latest piece and go WTF!

I doubt good old Jessica contemplates or even cares how her words might have negatively changed the arc of some woman’s life. It’s all how SHE feels right now. Everyone else is grey background.

Here’s a prediction: Five years from now she will pen an article espousing the liberating, empowering unwed mother route. Kids don’t need Dads! They just need Mothers like me. Oh, and ladies, make sure you get pregnant by someone who makes good coin. Cause kids are expensive!

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andybob June 27, 2012 at 04:13

Thanks, Mr Darryl X.

And may I say what an honour it is to have been ‘mocked’ by David Futrelle this week alongside a worthy MRA such as your good self. We feature in back-to-back articles (if you could call them that) in which he claims that I’m not very bright and you use too many “ands”. I think he’s been smoking too much catnip.

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Darryl X June 27, 2012 at 04:42

@ walking in hell -

Dunno what your take is on Nicole but I’m skeptical about her story. I’m a numbers guy. A statistician.

The odds of being abandoned by your father are very tiny. In the US it’s less than one-tenth of one percent of children.

The odds of being the victim of a real rape are very tiny. In the US, it’s less than one in seventy-two thousand women per year (and that depends upon how you interpret false allegations of rape so it could be even smaller). That number might very by a multiple of two or so but not a significant number. Certainly not an order of magnitude.

The odds of being molested (depending upon your definition which does not include any affectionate gesture) are very tiny (I don’t have data on that conveniently available but it’s less than rape).

The odds of being a victim of two of these developments in a lifetime is infinitessimally small. The odds of being a victim of all three is less than infinitessimally small. Not that it’s impossible. But extremely improbable.

The part that’s missing from her narrative is her responsibility for these developments (if they are in fact accurate). She fails to take any responsibility.

I was taken to the cleaners by two different mothers of my children. What they did is wrong and horrible. And I was a real victim of their malice and of the system that enabled and rewarded their criminal behavior.

But I also accept some responsibility because I was stupid enough to get involved with them knowing in advance the odds of being defrauded in the first place. So, I’m responsible to a degree.

That she was a victim of all these developments (and again I’m skeptical) reflects more upon her than it does those who allegedly violated her. But she hasn’t considered that. She’s just manipulating her audience with the public spectacle of her chronic victimhood.

I hear stories like hers all the time from women and whenever I inquire or dig deeper or investigate, their stories always (ALWAYS) fall apart. I’m not familiar with a single instance in which a woman has told me stories like the ones Nicole is telling which have ever turned out to be true.

She’s an example of why women should be subordinate in the Church.

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Nehalem June 27, 2012 at 04:44

Interested: “Oh, and ladies, make sure you get pregnant by someone who makes good coin. Cause kids are expensive!”

I think that will be the article in 10 years after the 5 year one about how awesome the single mother by choice path is.

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Darryl X June 27, 2012 at 04:50

@ Observer -

“These ladies know what they’ve become but insist on falling back into their useless ideologies in hopes that they’ll magically get a better deal.”

A good definition of insanity is to keep doing the same thing over and over again but always expecting a different result.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 11 Thumb down 0
Darryl X June 27, 2012 at 04:53

@ The Whammer -

“Still think married men live longer?”

No, it just seems that way. LOL

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AfOR June 27, 2012 at 04:56

@ DarrelX

My own particular psycho skank ho ex claimed she had been raped (multiple times by each guy) by eight or nine different guys in her not so very long life, she wasn’t sure of the number as it varied from testimony to testimony.

Me pointing out that “I think you would fucking well know if it was 8 or 9″ went down like a planet of pork on a rabbi.

So when the secret family court judge looks daggers at me the psycho skank ho ex’s lawyer takes note, and says “Mr AfOR, you don’t seem to be showing much compassion to your ex-wife suffering.” and invites me to reply.

I do not disappoint him (long past the time I knew where this case was going) and state that if as she claims every man who ever met her raped her repeatedly, you’d think she was getting used to it by now.

You could literally have heard a pin drop, these niggerz aren’t used to men doing anything but taking it up the ass and saying please sir can I have some more, in the vain hope of being allowed to see their kids one weekend in 4.

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crella June 27, 2012 at 05:00

‘Lost their “voices”? Is she fucking kidding? We are bombarded by their endless whinging about everything from imaginary workplace discrimination (sob) to how much they regret mismanaging their relationships (double plus sob).’

Yes, that ‘s a classic, isn’t it? Until recently Femisting’s home page had a comment about giving women a voice. When have they not had one!?

‘Here’s a little something to contemplate. How many young women out there read her “I Don’t” manifesto and dumped some guy or turned down a marriage proposal because they bought into her nonsense?’

Yes! She won’t take responsibility, though. I live outside the US. Once in a while I would pick up a Newsweek or Time to catch up (pre-internet), as many stories in the US aren’t covered here. I remember these articles, and remember being very alarmed by them. These are (were?) major news magazines…I expected the articles to be well-researched and to have some kind of foundation. I never expected that such declarative articles about the status family and marriage would be written by women like these, pushing a personal agenda. Considering that the quality of these magazines was so low then, despite the reputations of both publications, is it any wonder that after years of this kind of “journalism” being given a free pass, that networks like MSNBC present edited video as objective reporting?

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Ode June 27, 2012 at 05:16

Paul

A sad story. Dude spent ten years of his life in the city, and on this girl. Eventually gave up. I hope he built some savings – there’s nothing else worthwhile he is taking home.

Every beta male needs to learn this:
“Never make someone your priority, when they only make you an option.”

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zed June 27, 2012 at 05:45

Yet in the end, the relationship ended in one night. No discussion required.

“It just happened…”

No, sweetcheeks, “the relationship” died a long. slow, lingering, painful death. You spend 7 years poisoning it, and finally it breathed its last breath. All he did that one night was sign the death certificate.

There is a very annoying subtext to the whole whine that I have found to be very common among women – any offer a man makes them is not considered to be something they need to decide on right then, but is considered as a sort of IOU, or “chit”, that the woman can cash when she gets bored or there is no BBD on the horizon.

The bus done left, bimbo, and you weren’t on it. Camptown buses DON’T run all night, so there is likely to not be a another one, better than the last one, coming down the road at you.

The most important word in a man’s lexicon should be – “Next!”

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Towgunner June 27, 2012 at 05:58

This is what we have become. Give women their “voice” and all we hear is incoherent gibberish that makes no sense. Seriously, this kind of thing makes the case to muffle women’s voices again. She said – I don’t want to be married, I hate marriage its an oppressive institution, I need to concentrate on “my” “career”…blah blah blah. And now this…well I didn’t really mean that. Well, what did you mean you idiot, because what you’re demonstrating is that you don’t think things through, aka use critical thinking, you just follow a scripted and inherently spiteful narrative. Hence you’re not free; you’re a drone and conformist. And what did it get you? Nothing. So what good was it? None. Why should we be listening to you anymore? We shouldn’t. Also, has anyone heard or read the latest whine-fest in the article “why can’t women have it all”…I’d rather eat glass then read it myself. Here are some of the highlights – that women can’t have it all because the system isn’t designed for them. For instance, they say the school year and education isn’t optimized to their schedule. SSSSSTTTTOOOOOPPPP! Dam it women, stop…stop everything, stop talking, stop writing, stop thinking…stop it with this hysterics! Are you seriously that selfish to suggest that the whole world has to change for you! So, the reason why you can’t have it all is because the world doesn’t revolve around you? What? To women – MAN UP, you want to be like us, this is what it’s like being a Man. You deal. And if you’re good and lucky enough you might be able to get a lead on the system. How is it that every little thing is working against you, especially today how can it all be due to some mythical male oppression…NO women, you have everything going for you today in 2012. They drug young boys, re-write history, they give you jobs you don’t deserve…all because you whine and some white knight delivered. You know why you can’t have it all -it’s because of you, no one else is to blame and for that reason…maybe you’re not that good after all. After all the outlays, all the emotional outpourings, all the quotas, all the artistic plays, all the social engineering, all the reduced standards…the world is being given to women on a silver platter and they’re still underperforming – for those reasons its now painfully obvious women are the second sex.

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Yeoman June 27, 2012 at 06:15

As others have said, the key to his clean getaway was not having children. A clean break would not have been possible otherwise.

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Darryl X June 27, 2012 at 06:24

@ AfOR -

“I do not disappoint him (long past the time I knew where this case was going) and state that if as she claims every man who ever met her raped her repeatedly, you’d think she was getting used to it by now.”

Ha ha ha ha. I needed a good laugh this morning. Wish I coulda been there.

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American June 27, 2012 at 06:28

These days a man doesn’t get a fatty fat pork bloated US bureaucratic job unless he is “Sexually -Gender correct”.
The lefty white Gender-Raunch bureaucrats want socialism, but just for themselves. They want state and federal pork bloated socialist paychecks with full bennies for themselves (which they already got), and don’t give a rats ass those that are not in their community.

Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 21 Thumb down 14
Opus June 27, 2012 at 06:36

For her next article (why waste a good story) may I recommend that Miss Bennett write of the Divorce which surely would have been had the marriage which might have been come first. I think that what pisses her off is that she has been deprived of a much better story – the abuse, the adultery (his or hers – it hardly matters as it’s his fault), her working late and producing babies, his lack of concern for her, for her mother for her career, how she became unhaaaaaapy etc etc etc. God- where’s my tissues.

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Darryl X June 27, 2012 at 06:40

@ andybob -

Wow. I just visited Futrelle’s site (never been there before). Is he on our side or there’s? I couldn’t tell. Good to see he’s getting our message out for us.

I’ll have to remember not to use “and” so much. I’m a student of Cormac McCarthy and don’t like punctuation. It’s messy. Instead, I like to use “and” instead of commas. The literary criticism is welcome though. Although I agree with Mr Futrelle, I’ll probably just keep using “and” for artistic expression.

Concerning citations, there are plenty but I’m not writing a Doctoral dissertation. I’m sure in many other posts at The Spearhead and other sites I have given citations. So Mr Futrelle is welcome to consult them. And if not my posts (or those by others), he is welcome to check the facts himself. There is considerable volume of data and their objective analysis which have been reported in refereed scientific journals. They are abundant.

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Opus June 27, 2012 at 06:44

Imagine a man writing how he let some woman escape because he was working hard trying to build a career so as to provide adequately for himself, his future wife and future family, when the woman having had enough of waiting ten years bails out. Would the man get so much as one iota of sympathy? Not only would he not get any sympathy, everyone would blame him for waiting too long and regard him as a LOSER.

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Charles Martel June 27, 2012 at 06:47

Zed
There is a very annoying subtext to the whole whine that I have found to be very common among women – any offer a man makes them is not considered to be something they need to decide on right then, but is considered as a sort of IOU, or “chit”, that the woman can cash when she gets bored or there is no BBD on the horizon.

So true. For women, deciding who to marry is not really about falling in love (aka dopamine addiction) as it is for men, it’s about deciding whether the deal on the table is the best deal likely to be available.

Fortunately for you bitchez, men have already figured out who you should marry. It’s the same as deciding where to stop for lunch on a road trip and the answer is known as optimal stopping theory. I’ll spare you bitchez the simple math and go straight to the answer. If you reject the first marriage proposal you receive, you should marry the next man who proposes who is more attractive than the last man you rejected. This method works well for the small minority of women who are likely to receive multiple marriage proposals – three or more. For ordinary women, like Jessica, waiting until you’re thirty to effectively reject your first marriage proposal virtually guarantees a poor result, as the quality of the marriage proposals you receive will march relentlessly downwards from then on. Thus, you’ll wind up marrying the least attractive man who proposes to you if you marry at all. It’s inconceivably dumb to reject Mr. half-Greek and then continue living with him for six years as you’re then eliminating the theoretically better marriage proposals you may have received during that time. It’s a pretty good bet that Ms. Jessica will never get married as a result.

Yes, optimal stopping theory, another one of those boring man things.

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Ethical June 27, 2012 at 07:43

Powerful and insightful article. Coming up with great new posts on this blog day in and day out is an achievement in itself, but on top of that the writing here keeps on getting better and better.

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JFP June 27, 2012 at 07:49

Jessica Bennett eh? Adopted daughter of Bill Bennett? ;)

Billy says (10/4/2011 cnn.com):
“We may need to say to a number of our twenty-something men, “Get off the video games five hours a day, get yourself together, get a challenging job and get married.” It’s time for men to man up.”

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 13 Thumb down 0
keyster June 27, 2012 at 07:49

Do you know what’s happened to the characters on “Sex and the City”. The show was on 6 years and later 2 movies on, and they’re still searching for “Mr. Big”. Is that the ideal for women today?

Ms Bennet claims:
“The sad truth is that when we do see women rise to the top, we wonder: was it purely their abilities, or did it have something to do with their looks?”

Looks has as much to do with it as anything else, regardless of male or female. Management can never be sure exactly how competent you are or how hard you work in Encorpera; so they go by how you “look”. If you “look” like executive material, you’re a rather handsome man or woman, and you seem well spoken, dress sharply, drive a nice car, (have a cute wife if you’re a man) – carry yourself with a certian aplomb, and work the politics – with a little luck – you’ll rise to the top.

It’s a complete myth that if you work hard and are really good at what you do that you’ll succeed. You MUST have a certian look, a certian charisma, be “likeable” and be politically aware and/or connected. If you meet the nebulous criteria that a given corporate culture deems pertinent, you’ll succeed. If the President is an ex-marine and you’re an ex-marine, that’s good for you. If the deciding Executive happens to be female and you were a member of her sorority, you’ll do fine. Little connections like that are what really matter. Those who “work long hours” and do actual “work” are fools. It’s all about the IMAGE you present, some of which is out of your control.

The Forbes women are being completely misled with pop-culture work place tripe – and I won’t try to correct them.

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Firepower June 27, 2012 at 07:50

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

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keyster June 27, 2012 at 08:05

Yes! She won’t take responsibility, though. I live outside the US. Once in a while I would pick up a Newsweek or Time to catch up (pre-internet), as many stories in the US aren’t covered here. I remember these articles, and remember being very alarmed by them. These are (were?) major news magazines…I expected the articles to be well-researched and to have some kind of foundation.

Be aware the Internationl versions of those magazines have always been very different from the domestic versions. The anti-American/Leftist propaganda and cultural decline sentiment in both the European and Pacific Rim versions are not even the same magazines. Hatred of America drives subscription rates abroad.

If Americans read the international versions of Time or Newsweek, they’d be astounded at how blatantly anti-American they are. The Liberal publishers and editors HATE American exceptionalism.

Hot debate. What do you think? Thumb up 20 Thumb down 10
Charles Martel June 27, 2012 at 08:06

Oh those darn NYT liberal femcunts!
What hypocrites!!
WHEN WILL they ever LEARN!

Thank you, Numbah TEN!

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 11 Thumb down 2
Take The Red Pill June 27, 2012 at 08:13

“Finally, Bennett changed her mind. It seems to happen right at about this age for career women: around 30. …”

Now THAT’S a coincidence!
(sarcasm off)

There’s no more fitting punishment for a feminist than to have her most deeply-held beliefs become fact.
She’d better snuggle up to that career — there isn’t going to be any handsome prince on a white horse that will come riding in and play ‘Captain Save-A-’Ho’.
It takes a long time, but there’s such wonderful schadenfreude watching these privileged princesses play ‘strong, empowered career woman’ as they slowly cut their own throats.
Especially when they find that the bicycles have realized that they don’t need fish, either!

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Dokney June 27, 2012 at 08:24

@keyster

“Be aware the Internationl versions of those magazines have always been very different from the domestic versions. ” -Keyster

Agreed. I was floored when I had perused a copy in Europe of a major weekly that I had seen on the other side of the Atlantic several hours before. Same cover, different stories.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 9 Thumb down 0
Reader June 27, 2012 at 08:38

I wonder if we’re beginning to see a long-awaited shift in power balance back to males on the marriage market. For the last 5 years or so it seems that women have held the upper hand and they’ve been saying “no” to relationships and commitment, while men have been much more interested in these things, reversing the traditional stereotype. Jessica Bennett herself wrote about this 2008-2012 trend in Newsweek:

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2012/02/21/why-men-are-settling-for-mrs-good-enough.html

Right now, however, the trend may be reversing yet again, with women starting to become more concerned about getting married and starting families, while men are having some more choices and are a little more relaxed. Bennett’s latest article is a case in point; we may be seeing more of these in the future.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 16 Thumb down 2
zed June 27, 2012 at 09:19

It’s time for men to man up.

We don’t need to – women are doing plenty of “manning up” these days. Leaves us men with more time for fishing.

“Hey, sweetcheeks, since you are up, how about getting me another beer?” ;)

Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 28 Thumb down 0
ahamkara June 27, 2012 at 09:41

@walking in hell

If anything I think God chose you to fight for your son, and to tell your story. It may not be a winnable fight, but by leading by example you may be able to prevent the tragedy for someone else in your son’s honor – maybe even for your son himself. You are worthy of the task. Make that woman work for the rest of her life to prop up her spiteful existence. Living a morally corrupt life is tiring. She will break before you do.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 0
Towgunner June 27, 2012 at 09:50

@ Keyster

“It’s a complete myth that if you work hard and are really good at what you do that you’ll succeed. You MUST have a certian look, a certian charisma, be “likeable” and be politically aware and/or connected. If you meet the nebulous criteria that a given corporate culture deems pertinent, you’ll succeed.”

Its unfortunate, but true. And this has and will always exist, but, what matters is to what degree. First, I attribute the acceleration of this dynamic over the recent years to the artificial rise of feminism. So, we can thank the newly added female “perspective” to business for this inherently inefficient paradigm. Nepotism, used to be less about looks, which was actually a fairer situation when you think about it. Again, thank women and their innate worshiping of superficiality…but according to them it’s not looks but what’s on the inside that counts – hypocrites. Concurrent with the demise of the middle class along with the retardation of social mobility we now have “the look” trumping innovation, genius, hard work etc. It’s sad. Certainly, Donald Trump doesn’t have “the look” ref his hair or lack thereof…nor did Bill Gates etc. In the not so distant past you could work hard and make a very decent living, matter of fact that was the essence, power and appeal of the American Dream, which is dead. For me feminism was an integral part of destroying the American Dream. And they call this is “progress”…its up to the MRA to bring this to light and to show the world that giving her “her turn” HAS not resulted in a better world but a worse one.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 9 Thumb down 4
crella June 27, 2012 at 10:00

‘Be aware the Internationl versions of those magazines have always been very different from the domestic versions.’

And, they cost twice as much and have half as many pages. They did have more news in them than the local English newspaper, though. The English newspapers very often have two and three page features on other Asian countries, with no page increase…you buy a paper only to open it up to find three full pages devoted to Thailand, and they do that regularly. You don’t know when you’re going to get a newspaper or a travel brochure. So until I could read Japanese Time filled the gap.

‘any offer a man makes them is not considered to be something they need to decide on right then, but is considered as a sort of IOU, or “chit”, that the woman can cash when she gets bored or there is no BBD on the horizon. ‘

How true! And how rude! I can’t imagine a man doing this to a woman and having it end well. Someone proposes to you and you have to ‘think about it’? There’s your answer right there, but they hang on, in case nothing better comes along. Rude, inconsiderate and selfish.

Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 22 Thumb down 1
Ecclesiastes June 27, 2012 at 10:26

This is such a great story!

I can’t wait for the sequel. I hear her bad boy wrecks the car with the 20 year old co-ed he’s been banging in the backseat. She discovers that her insurance lapsed when the check bounced by finding the notice in the trunk with the maxed out credit card statements. Bad boy gets her money and the girl let him move in with her to “save money”.

It’s a feel good romance story. I love’em!

Popcorn?

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 11 Thumb down 1
Eric June 27, 2012 at 11:07

Darryl X,
I don’t like visiting Flabtrelle’s site either. He’s not finished though; I checked him out today he featured an article with a whole bunch of regular Spearhead commentors: Keyster, Ryu, Mojo, Anon70 and some others.

Nothing like free advertising! LOL

Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 17 Thumb down 1
Firepower June 27, 2012 at 11:31

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

Poorly-rated. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 4 Thumb down 30
Eric June 27, 2012 at 11:34

Andybob,
‘Her article was an act of spiteful revenge.’

Her ex was really lucky that he got off that lightly. She could have made a false accusation and then he’d really be hosed.

Somebody posted an article on another blog a few months ago about singer Katy Perry doing the same thing. She wrote some song/video about ‘the one that got away.’ Katy Perry—young, rich, pretty, talented—she could have her pick of men. But what did Ms. Princess do instead? Used all that power to pounce on some guy who didn’t line up at the Pedestal like he was supposed to.

These feminised bitches always complain that men ‘are obsessed with sex’ and that they ‘don’t need a man’. The reverse is actually true; they’re completely obsessed with forcing men to give them attention.

Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 25 Thumb down 0
Towgunner June 27, 2012 at 11:37

@ Keyster

“It’s a complete myth that if you work hard and are really good at what you do that you’ll succeed. You MUST have a certian look, a certian charisma, be “likeable” and be politically aware and/or connected. If you meet the nebulous criteria that a given corporate culture deems pertinent, you’ll succeed.”

Its unfortunate, but true. And this has and will always exist, but, what matters is to what degree. First, I attribute the acceleration of this dynamic over the recent years to the artificial rise of feminism. So, we can thank the newly added female “perspective” to business for this inherently inefficient paradigm. Nepotism, used to be less about looks, which was actually a fairer situation when you think about it. Again, thank women and their innate worshiping of superficiality…but according to them it’s not looks but what’s on the inside that counts – hypocrites. Concurrent with the demise of the middle class along with the retardation of social mobility we now have “the look” trumping innovation, genius, hard work etc. It’s sad. Certainly, Donald Trump doesn’t have “the look” ref his hair or lack thereof…nor did Bill Gates etc. In the not so distant past you could work hard and make a very decent living, matter of fact that was the essence, power and appeal of the American Dream, which is dead. For me feminism was an integral part of destroying the American Dream. And they call this is “progress”…its up to the MRA to bring this to light and to show the world that giving her “her turn” HAS not resulted in a better world but a worse one.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 4
Georice81 June 27, 2012 at 11:43

@OPus

“Imagine a man writing how he let some woman escape because he was working hard trying to build a career so as to provide adequately for himself, his future wife and future family, when the woman having had enough of waiting ten years bails out. Would the man get so much as one iota of sympathy? Not only would he not get any sympathy, everyone would blame him for waiting too long and regard him as a LOSER.”

Yeah. They made a movie about a man who did that once. Ever hear of Scrooge?

Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 18 Thumb down 0
Anonymous Reader June 27, 2012 at 11:46

But, but, but, gosh! She’s a strong, independent, woman who needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle. Why regret anything, when if she had to, she could do anything. She is strong! She is invincible! She is Woman!

Welmer, you nailed it with Plan B. She was waiting for her SoulMate(TM) to come along and sweep her off to Disney Princess Snowflake land on his unicorn, but when that didn’t happen, eh, whatshisname is good enough.

We know why 30 is a magic number, because that’s when extra hormones start kicking into gear in women. It’s basic evo-bio; if a woman hasn’t reproduced by 30 her odds of succeeding are dropping fast. So testosterone and estrogen both kick up, making her desire to get pregnant screamingly intense. She’s approaching the “wall”, and her body knows it.

This little drama is surely playing out across the country. I hope that whatshisname has the good sense to learn some Game and find himself a younger, hotter, woman in Seattle.

Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 20 Thumb down 0
Eric June 27, 2012 at 11:50

Anon Reader:
‘ find himself a younger, hotter woman in Seattle.’

Unless he finds one in the Asian community here, his odds are worse than NY. Otherwise the only young, hot women you see in Seattle are on TV.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 10 Thumb down 1
keyster June 27, 2012 at 12:05

Darryl X,
I don’t like visiting Flabtrelle’s site either. He’s not finished though; I checked him out today he featured an article with a whole bunch of regular Spearhead commentors: Keyster, Ryu, Mojo, Anon70 and some others.

Apparently Manboob HeatherN plays video games, but can’t even figure out how to make a block quote.

@blitzgal

“This is starting to change in video games, to the point where if I start up a game and find that I can’t play as a female character, I turn it off.”

I often do the same…except Bastion and Half Life…those are just awesome.

Also, off topic, but can anyone tell me how to do the block quotes? I keep failing.

Yep, she’s a technical wizard!

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 1
zed June 27, 2012 at 12:12

Also, off topic, but can anyone tell me how to do the block quotes? I keep failing.

Start with the less-than symbol

Then what you are quoting.

Close it with the ending tag /blockquote enclosed in the symbols.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 1
Peter South June 27, 2012 at 12:14

@Firepower
“I think your leadership is what The Kids around here need.They can learn to complain elegantly too, so when they hit 40, they’ll be successful Internet Activists!® like you and carry on your work.”

Don’t be so humble! We need a new generation of douchy firebrands with tough sounding names to follow these 40 year old successful Internet Activists around making random snarky comments and wasting their reader’s time with vaguely coherent, bitchy gibberish.

Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 26 Thumb down 1
zed June 27, 2012 at 12:14

crap.-

Also, off topic, but can anyone tell me how to do the block quotes? I keep failing.

Let’s try this

Also, off topic, but can anyone tell me how to do the block quotes? I keep failing.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 1
zed June 27, 2012 at 12:17

Crap again.

I see why this board software keeps defeating you. Let me try this again –

Also, off topic, but can anyone tell me how to do the block quotes? I keep failing.

</code)

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 1
zed June 27, 2012 at 12:19

One mo’ time –
let’s try this –
(blockquote)your quote(/blockquote)

Use the less than and greater than symbols in place of the parenthesis.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 4 Thumb down 1
Eric June 27, 2012 at 12:30

Keyster;
‘Yep she’s a technical wizard.’

Grrrrl Power is on display at Flabtrelle’s 24/7. LOL

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0
Anonymous Reader June 27, 2012 at 12:41

Eric, it appears that Zed does the same thing I do, hand insert HTML.

To introduce italics: “”
To end italics: “”

Take out the quotes ” and that gets you started. The basics of HTML are very logical, you can do bold the same way. Turn on a text effect by putting it in brackets and turn it off the same way, with a forward slash .

Helpful?

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 1
Anonymous Reader June 27, 2012 at 12:48

Hah! Again I shall try.


Open italics with
Close italics by

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 1
Anonymous Reader June 27, 2012 at 12:51

Man, I’m getting annoyed.
Looks like the “less than” and “greater than” signs are reserved here.

Open italics with “less than” i “greater than”.
Close italics with “less than” / i “greater than”.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 1
TFH June 27, 2012 at 12:57

Zed! There you are…

I was worried about your multi-month disappearance over at Dalrock’s.

Good to see you back.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 10 Thumb down 1
Rusty Shackelford June 27, 2012 at 14:02

She wanted everything on her terms and is now upset she didn’t get what she wanted. Boo hoo. I’m amazed the guy stuck it out – she basically told him that she had no problem shacking up with him but would not become his wife. If that were me, I would have ended it the second she rejected my proposal. I’m glad she feels the regret, she should.

I was in a somewhat similar situation, although things didn’t get as far as a proposal. I had dated a girl four about four years, which covered an overlap between college and “real world” years. I was working hard at establishing myself in a career (one that, ten years later, I am very successful in), and made it no secret that I was very serious about her. She decided she’d rather have a “Sex and the City” type lifestyle, which I understood. We were in our early twenties and settling down is not for everybody. I think she was caught off guard at how quickly I accepted her decision to split up. I moved on, found somebody else, and got married a few years later (I know, flame away if you want, but, as sure as anybody can be about these things, I believe I’ve got a great woman). She flipped out on me when she found out. I didn’t understand. Later on found out through some mutual friends that she had it in her head that I would be around for her once she got all the fun and partying out of her system. What she didn’t understand was the second I realized that she was not as serious about the relationship as I was, she became dead to me. Last I heard she’s still single and bitter about it. Oh well.

Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 62 Thumb down 0
Darryl X June 27, 2012 at 14:35

@ keyster -

Yeah I saw the article. I dropped a post there. I don’t know why. It’s a compulsion of mine to try and enlighten others about reality and our economy and the fate that is going to befall everybody (including women and feminists). Someone there named “pecunium” kept citing data from 1991 to make a point. I dunno. A little out-dated. And she kept citing data from the Census incorrecly identifying reports by mothers of child support received and equating that to what fathers actually owe and then using that number to calculate or predict incomes and then claiming we don’t have it that bad. There’s a steep learning curve there. Also, some others kept referring to something called a steampunk octopus. I dunno what that is. Is that another name for penis or child support? Pecunium also kept using the word “bullshit” which I didn’t think was very ladylike. I wonder if she ever gets laid. I guess I just want to go live in a cave. After forty-four years, I just can’t relate to people anymore.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 14 Thumb down 0
Darryl X June 27, 2012 at 14:46

@ Eric -

Sorry. My last post was probably meant for you and not keyster. I’m tired. It’s been a long day. Not paying attention.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 0
Brigadon June 27, 2012 at 14:53

Hey, does anyone know where David Futrelle lives? City is enough, I can get more specific from there.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 8 Thumb down 1
Charles Martel June 27, 2012 at 14:57

Rusty Shackelford
I moved on, found somebody else, and got married a few years later (I know, flame away if you want, but, as sure as anybody can be about these things, I believe I’ve got a great woman).

Why would you be flamed for that? Most men would marry if they could find a sane woman. Hope you’re right about her.

She flipped out on me when she found out. I didn’t understand. Later on found out through some mutual friends that she had it in her head that I would be around for her once she got all the fun and partying out of her system.

She must have a rationalization hamster the size of a Shetland Pony.

Her: Oh yeah, Rusty’ll stick around while I ride a mile of cock. Why wouldn’t he? I’m so special!

Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 24 Thumb down 3
The Whammer June 27, 2012 at 16:18

@ The Whammer -

“Still think married men live longer?”

No, it just seems that way. LOL

“People who don’t drink or smoke don’t live twice as long, it just seems like twice as long”
-Winston Churhill

After a lifetime of drinking brandy and smoking cigars the poor man died prematurely at the age of 90. :)

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 14 Thumb down 0
The Whammer June 27, 2012 at 16:35

Perhaps it’s not too late to point out that at the seven year mark in a relationship or marriage you’ve already had 98% of

7 years?

During the first year of marriage put a penny in a jar every time you have sex. From the 2nd year on take a penny out every time you have sex. When you die they’ll still be pennies in the jar :)

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 12 Thumb down 1
meistergedanken June 27, 2012 at 17:22

Brigadon,
He is in chicago. He also has a LinkedIn profile.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0
Philip June 27, 2012 at 17:35

I feel happy for him. Imagine if he had been stuck with her. It is truly sad how blatantly narcissistic women are these days. That kind of selfishness will haunt her all her life. The only word I can think of that describes a person with that entitled self-absorbed mind set trying to build relationships is sabotage.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 8 Thumb down 0
Soapwort McFuggletoes June 27, 2012 at 17:42

It is far easier to regret being married than to regret being single.

Blessings to all who are though!

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 12 Thumb down 2
W.F. Price June 27, 2012 at 18:51

Hey, does anyone know where David Futrelle lives? City is enough, I can get more specific from there.

-Brigadon

Best to just leave the guy alone. As I’ve said before, the situation can get volatile and dangerous when strangers confront people in person. And there’s absolutely no reason to harass someone through telephone or anything like that. However, if he plans another public event, by all means show up and exercise your right to make your opinion known.

Eric June 27, 2012 at 19:02

Price:
Somehow, I would think that just BEING David Futrelle is punishment enough. Actually just imagining what his place must look like is kind of disgusting.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 9 Thumb down 1
Uncle Elmer June 27, 2012 at 19:41

“Uncle Elmer, would probably know better than me. Please chime in, good sir.”

You are doing a great job andybob.

I don’t want to lay any more hurt on Ms. Casanova Frankenstein.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 8 Thumb down 1
dannyfrom504 June 27, 2012 at 19:43

i’ve always said guys need to just hack out until they get into their 30′s, then they see that their outlook on women and relationships (usually) changes.

dude definately dodged a bullet, and i bet he knows it.

and many men are starting to realize that marriage just isn’t worth it and once a man hit’s his 30′s….his options get more varied. for women, they lose options as they age.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 13 Thumb down 1
MRA June 27, 2012 at 19:52

Perfect with the “plan B” issue, she was waiting for her career to get ahead and become “a successful writer”, she had many other men trying to get her into bed, her price in the free sexual market was high, her plan was to get a better man after she become “a successful writer” she did not want strings attached, married to a beta, she would get or at least she was thinking an alpha will come and offer marriage, that was her plan A, if that did not work she goes back to the plan B, the beta guy waiting down the stair.

The guy now has many advantage over her, looking like they are around the same age, he can still have children and when men are around 30s they get more attention from the early 20 something girls, he can now have a woman the same age the failed writer was when he was torn down.

This a the part MSM, education system don’t tell women, about delaying children, once the biological clock start running out there is not come back.

tick tock tick tock.

The last thing they know is that “warm” welcome of menopause.

Who knows, maybe she will be one of the many cougars on bars and nightclubs trying to get a early 20s unemployed guy by offering money and sex.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RYV68ChDrKs

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4sEB2nR83eo&feature=fvwrel

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 2
Glenn June 27, 2012 at 20:34

The man spends 10 years learning and growing, and as a result will be much better off in another 10 years.

The woman spends 10 years devolving, learns absolutely nothing, and will be utterly spent in another 10 years.

I see nothing wrong with this outcome.

Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 19 Thumb down 0
Pirran June 27, 2012 at 20:47

I’ve just read the obit. for Nora Ephron on HuffPuff. Here’s the conclusion to the commencement speech she gave at Wellesley, her old Alma Mater, in 1996:

“Whatever you choose, however many roads you travel, I hope that you choose not to be a lady. I hope you will find some way to break the rules and make a little trouble out there. And I also hope that you will choose to make some of that trouble on behalf of women. Thank you. Good luck. The first act of your life is over. Welcome to the best years of your lives.”

Way to go, grrls, keep giving it to the MAN and never settle for those beta schlubs. You’re all hot, sexy, GODDESSES. You deserve the Alpha that is yours by BIRTHRIGHT. THAT MEANS YOU, JESSICA.

Hey-ho. She made amiable comedies (life-changing events according to the HuffPuff hagiographies) and I’m sorry she’s kicked the bucket, but wow. It’s no wonder those Wellesley girls now feel regret; look at what they were brought up to believe in.

http://new.wellesley.edu/events/commencementarchives/1996commencement

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/06/26/nora-ephron-dead-dies-age-71_n_1627757.html?utm_hp_ref=mostpopular

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 7 Thumb down 0
DirkJohanson June 27, 2012 at 21:35

Thos.

Great Books for Men is kind of a genius. I’m not saying I agree with everything he writes, but if you can ignore his writing style, you will see why he is legend on other websites.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 7 Thumb down 2
W.F. Price June 27, 2012 at 22:22

Thos.

Great Books for Men is kind of a genius. I’m not saying I agree with everything he writes, but if you can ignore his writing style, you will see why he is legend on other websites.

-DirkJohanson

Yeah, he sure puts the effort in, and has good ideas. But as the editor it’s my job to make sure his posts are at least intelligible.

Then again, James Joyce got away with Finnegan’s Wake…

Anon June 27, 2012 at 22:53

Hey, does anyone know where David Futrelle lives? City is enough, I can get more specific from there.

I, like others, don’t advocate doing anything…

…But the answer to your question is Chicago.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0
anonymous X June 27, 2012 at 23:02

Money quote FTW:
[i]Although it’s probably true that he loved her more than she loved him, as it’s pretty clear that Bennett loved herself above all others, what had really changed is that he had started to care about himself as well. [b]Women have a way of teaching men how to do that. Use a man enough, and eventually his self-preservation instinct kicks in.[/b][/i]

I can damn well remember that lesson too.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0
Sun June 27, 2012 at 23:59

Since we are on the subject of Manboobz I decided to look at the first comment from Blizgirl. She quotes:

“The school curriculums are geared toward female success. Schools have countless women’s programs. Female teachers can be as hateful as they want towards male students without facing consequences. People cheer when girls succeed in school, but jeer when boys succeed in school. Even though females have every advantage in the education system, they somehow still have the audacity to complain. They take fluff majors but don’t realize anyone with less than half a brain could pass classes in the humanities and social sciences.”

Her response:

“What you’ve just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.”

Indeed. How cliche.

Um…

Except most of the poster said can be easily verified (i.e. programs). Soft sciences are easier then hard sciences by the credits that class has (although very inaccurate at times). I guessing she must be pissed because she majored in one of those soft sciences. At no point did she even attempt to disprove the specific programs and shelters at schools, because she knows it is true. The best “Blizgirl” can do is tell everyone how dumb the person is by the fact that he addresses multiple issues in a single paragraph. Of course they applaud.

I say lets follow up on Blizgrils advice about making them dumber. I’ll give someone else a shot for this statement by our intelligent friend “ragefromthebasement:”

“MRAs talking out of both sides of their mouth…again.

1. Women are bad if they look attractive because they’re giant cockteases/they’re bad if they don’t look attractive because that is an insult to male sexuality

2. Women are bad if they are independent from men and have a career/they’re bad if they’re a SAHW and mooch off of a man.

3. Women don’t deserve the vote because they can’t get drafted and serve in combat/women are weak and make terrible soldiers and shouldn’t be allowed in the Army.

4. Feminism is a global conspriracy that controls the world/feminism is a failure because it is illogical.

5. Women are cold hearted and have no feelings/women are too emotional and incapable of being reasonable.

I’m getting whiplash. Make up your minds, assholes!”

Indeed “ragefromthebasement,” you are about to get a whiplash!

After that, it gets to a really low grade form of stupid. So I’ll stop because it better for all our health, right Blizgirl?

Again I’ll leave this from one smart commenter, Jayem Griffin, “But if anyone can pass humanities and social science courses, then why do people fail?”

That was a response too someone on Spearhead saying, “They take fluff majors but don’t realize anyone with less than half a brain could pass classes in the humanities and social sciences.”

Epic fail.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 9 Thumb down 1
Eric June 28, 2012 at 00:13

Sun;
The best arguments that American women ever make is the argument that it’s better to avoid them like them plague. And every time they open their mouths, they make the argument more convincing.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 13 Thumb down 0
Sun June 28, 2012 at 00:16

@ Eric

The scary part is that not all of them are American nor women.

We got a diverse crowd here.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 4 Thumb down 0
Migu June 28, 2012 at 01:54

http://www.w3schools.com/tags/tag_blockquote.asp

Most of the tags on that website work here.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0
crella June 28, 2012 at 04:23

‘She flipped out on me when she found out.’

That’s so crazy, but exactly what Zed was talking about. Even a refused proposal is a chit to cash in on later. Come to think of it, aren’t most chick flicks plotted that way? They break up, she messes around , at the end of the movie he’s waiting on her doorstep?

Sun-

‘“MRAs talking out of both sides of their mouth…again.’

Clear evidence of how in lock-step these people are….they can’t imagine people in the same movement having different opinions…they don’t allow it, you see.

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 16 Thumb down 2
Rusty June 28, 2012 at 07:47

“He had never forgiven me for turning him down.”

Right, it’s HIS fault for not “forgiving” her. You see, a man’s life has no no value of itself, only the value that selfish, indecisive, greedy wymyn assign to it. He should have enjoyed being strung along by her! A feminist is always perfect, men are always to blame.

Kill liberalism, kill democracy, take back the vote from women. They have proven a million times that they have a hard time running their own lives, and are disasters at running the lives of others.

Well-loved. Like or Dislike: Thumb up 19 Thumb down 3
Darryl X June 28, 2012 at 07:58

@ Rusty -

“take back the vote from women”

Absolutely!!

Like or Dislike: Thumb up 11 Thumb down 3
Rusty June 28, 2012 at 08:46

This ugly skank Bennett (looks Jewish; Jewish women have been way overrepresented in feminist leadership) wrote that marriage no longer serves women’s interests. Society, culture, tradition, the country, the future, children, men, sons, and fathers — all be damned! Is there anyone more hatefully selfish than a feminist?

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Trimegistus June 28, 2012 at 08:48

Dorothy L. Sayers figured this one out nearly a century ago. In one of her Peter Wimsey mysteries, “Strong Poison,” Harriet Vane agrees to live with the man she loves without marriage (even though it’s 1920s Britain and that’s a big-deal scandal) — but when he finally pops the question she leaves. If women readers can understand this in a mystery novel written decades ago, why can’t they understand it about their own lives today?

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Brigadon June 28, 2012 at 10:37

one by one:

“1. Women are bad if they look attractive because they’re giant cockteases/they’re bad if they don’t look attractive because that is an insult to male sexuality.”
That is…what? MRA’s generally hate fat chicks because they are lazy, and a lot of ‘hot chicks’ get a pass for whatever dishonorable things they do just because they are ‘hot’. where’s the conflict?

“2. Women are bad if they are independent from men and have a career/they’re bad if they’re a SAHW and mooch off of a man.”
actually, the second part of that statement is a flat lie. SAHM women are NOT bad as long as they are faithful and supportive, and no MRA has ever claimed they are bad. of course, if they ‘mooch off men’ and don’t give back faithfulness and support, I’d be happy to see them locked in a ‘nag’s hood’ until their eyes bleed.

“3. Women don’t deserve the vote because they can’t get drafted and serve in combat/women are weak and make terrible soldiers and shouldn’t be allowed in the Army.”
How do these conflict? Women shouldn’t be allowed to vote.

“4. Feminism is a global conspriracy that controls the world/feminism is a failure because it is illogical.”
feminism is a global conspiracy that is utterly illogical. See ‘cult’ and ‘social darwinism’ for more information. thousands of people die each year from texting while driving, and yet at every intersection I see people texting and driving.

“5. Women are cold hearted and have no feelings/women are too emotional and incapable of being reasonable.”

Both, women are overly emotional in any situation where their own self-interest is threatened, and in response to that threat they are utterly ruthless and dishonorable. When it comes to men (who they percieve as a threat to their self-interest) they are utterly incapable of their vaunted ‘empathy’, which only exists for selfish purposes.

As far as their inability to be reasonable, that is simply-self evident, regardless of whether or not their emotions are involved. Women are incapable of seeing logic, thinking ahead, or even extrapolating results beyond their immediate desires. They are not even capable of making themselves happy.

Bear in mind, of course, that when speaking in generalities, it is always possible to pull exceptions. The difference is, females believe that exceptions ARE the rule, and men demonstrate that exceptions PROVE the rule.

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Legion June 28, 2012 at 13:06

GBFM, I finally love poetry.

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Anonymous Reader June 28, 2012 at 15:14

Cripes, people, don’t waste time over Manbooby. He’s like some 8 year old boy who roams around the neighborhood, then runs home to tell his Mommy and sisters about something some other child did – a tattletale.
“Mommy, mommy, Bobby threw a rock! I don’t throw rocks, I’m a good boy. Can I have a cupcake?” Whereupon his sisters tell him how good he is, and pull out a half dozen Little Debbie cakes for him to gobble.

Alternatively, Manbooby is the owner of a hair and nail salon, spending his days gossiping. “Did you see what that dreadful Robert MRA said? Oooh, he makes me so mad, I could just cry” and all the women in the shop nod and chatter to each other about how rotten men are, and how good Manbooby is. Then, of course, they charge their nail & hair work on plastic, with some man paying the bill…but I digress.

It’s just idle gossip. How pathetic is that? I’d much rather discuss issues – false rape accusations, divorce theft, misandry in the legal system, and so forth – than gossip about who said what to whom. I’d rather trade drink recipes than read about whose comment on what thread contained which “trigger words”.

Manginabooby just another beta orbiter. He’s perpetually seeking the approval of feminist women, and anyone who knows the slightest bit of Game can be sure where that leads. Discussing his gossip column, his hair salon, his latest foray around the neighborhood is an utter waste of time. I’m done on this.

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Anonymous Reader June 28, 2012 at 15:18

So back to Welmer’s original posting.

My cynical side has a question: isn’t this article by Ms. Bennett just a big, fat, book proposal? It’s not as if the market for “Poor, Poor, Me, I Am Woman, Man Up And Marry MeMeMe!” books has been saturated. Far from it.

So, anyone want to start a pool? I say she’ll have a book deal in 12 months or less. The working title is “Regrettable Men”. ‘Cause it’s All Men’s Fault – everything always is.

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Ric June 28, 2012 at 15:59

Anybody catch this part in the article at the end?

“I remembered a conversation my Newsweek co-author had had with her mother about our article. “I’ll tell you why you need marriage,” she told her. “Because it makes it harder for the other person to leave.” ”

I thought it was funny to see how even though feminism teaches that marriage is oppressive to women, here some women are actually inclined to use it just for that purpose, but instead to oppress men. Basically to bind and hogtie a man to them through legal services that guarantee he’ll stay regardless of whatever it is she does or becomes.

If that’s a woman’s attitude about marriage, then run before you become the unwilling grunt having to serve her selfish ass.

I’d have to agree that this woman does sound like she regrets her decision, but is she apologetic for it? Nah, she seems to be trying to displace the blame from herself. This I guarantee will ward off any reasonably intelligent man from committing to her.

Allow me to elaborate for a second there because its useful advice. If a woman cannot accept responsibility for her actions, then run. Often I’ve dated women who when it comes to relationships, always blame their ex’s. Little do they realize that no matter what, in a relationship both parties bear at least some semblance of responsibility for its outcome.

I’m reminded of a story of a man who left his umbrella in the cab on the way home. While heading to his apartment he was sorely dismayed.
“Don’t worry is friend reminded him, its just an umbrella, you can always get another.”
He responded, “You don’t understand. Because of my carelessness, someone tonight, will be tempted to steal my umbrella.”

This is a powerful example of how our actions influence others, and about accepting responsibility for everything we do and how it is perceived and responded to by others. In a relationship, if your ex goes crazy, accept the fact that she made the choice, but ask yourself, what could you have done to help keep her from going over the edge?

This doesn’t mean we are all terrible people, but rather it takes a great deal of character and integrity to be this responsible and mature about our actions. If we all did this, then it could change our outlook on life, on everything we do, and help us be better for it.

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PeterTheGreat June 28, 2012 at 16:06

A couple thoughts from Oscar Wilde:

“husbands of very beautiful women belong to the criminal classes.”

“When a woman marries again, it is because she detested her first husband. When a man marries again, it is because he adored his first wife. Women try their luck; men risk theirs.”

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zed June 28, 2012 at 17:34

“I’ll tell you why you need marriage,” she told her. “Because it makes it harder for the other person to leave.”

I thought it was funny to see how even though feminism teaches that marriage is oppressive to women, here some women are actually inclined to use it just for that purpose, but instead to oppress men. Basically to bind and hogtie a man to them through legal services that guarantee he’ll stay regardless of whatever it is she does or becomes.

If that’s a woman’s attitude about marriage, then run before you become the unwilling grunt having to serve her selfish ass.

Right at 25 years ago, I had almost exactly this same conversation with a woman that I had made the horrible mistake of allowing her to move in with me. Her contribution to the shared living expenses was that we split the grocery bill – I paid for everything else, including having the house cleaned.

After a few months of living together, she started harping on getting married, and failing at that trying to get me to put her name on the house. Over the course of several months the arguments over marriage got more frequent, and bloodier. I knew what she was up to, and was determined to smoke her out.

After one prolonged screaming match, I simply confronted her with why in the world she was making such a big deal about marriage. Religion was not a workable excuse for her because she was vehement in her rejection of Christianity and claimed to be Jewish. In reality, she was the daughter of an adopted son of Jewish parents – and his lineage was either completely unknown or a closely guarded family secret.

Even though I knew the answer to my question, the bald-faced way she responded still took me by surprise – “Well, now you are NOT LEGALLY BOUND!!

(or gagged, either, I thought)

While I had met quite a few women with user tendencies up until then, it took months of observing this woman to realize that she was completely and totally, and nothing but, a user.

I was in my late 30s, and had listened to years of “You are just too picky, you are looking for the perfect woman.” I had decided to “lower my sights” and “settle”, and gave this woman far more chances than she deserved.

Some of my historic animosity toward Christians goes back to this period. I kept telling her than I would not even think about “committing” until the relationship got better. It was part of the weird transition in mating relationships of the 1980s that we ended up in “couples counseling” – not marital counseling because I refuse to marry her until she grew up a little, but “couples counseling” – to see if we could ever pull the relationship back between the ditches so I would even consider marriage.

The “Christian” counselor took the stance which has become very familiar to Christians – “you are the man, so everything is your fault.”

Fortunately, I was stubborn enough, and clear enough on my values, that I held them both off, and after a few months threw her out. It was like getting rid of a tapeworm, and at that point I swore to myself that I would never allow a woman to live in my house again.

I think the only “regret” that Bennett actually feels is “the one that got away.” When the day comes for her that she wants to scale back her career, and indulge her baby-rabies, she may not find another stupid schlub to pick up the check.

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Sun June 28, 2012 at 18:21

@ zed

There was a post about Christianity and marriage on The Spearhead. Shouldn’t that be there?

I think it is cultural and the way people are (essence) rather then religion.

I’m not religious myself. However, I found that religious girls, despite possible incompatibilities, tended to far most agreeable then the liberal girls I grown up with who live in the South Bay.

They just are nicer. I’ve dated a girl, while she is not Morman, her entire family is, and she is from Utah. Very different way of looking at life then the typical Southern Californian girl. It is hard to explain but it seems like people from there believe in working for the greater good of a relationship often putting aside their self interest.

I can see that is not your take, but growing up here in this culture, women tend to give nothing but a shit about themselves. I’m not a big fan of Christians myself due the in your face attitude that many have and I just don’t believe in that stuff.

Also foreign women don’t have the same expectation or demanding attitudes and beliefs as here. They tend not to be as materialistic. There is also a feminine quality lacking. The feeling that she needs you and it gives you some sort of importance. I think love when they are important and can “fix” or “protect” her. It goes to our evolutionary instincts.

Any who, that particular girl, while not being religious, had some of the values rubbed off on her because she grew up in an entirely different culture. She was probably a great fit because she was not religious but yet retained certain positive traits. She unfortunately went back. But it was a very welcoming experience.

Unfortunately, due to a lack of money (of traveling), my experience tends to nearly non-existent. However, I can detect what “type” of women someone is and get a “feel” for her. If you know what I mean.

I haven’t dated a true feminist, but I have dated a post modern liberal Southern California woman. Let just say I should’ve left by the first date and finally bailed on the second.

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zed June 28, 2012 at 19:04

@sun,

I really didn’t intend my post to be about Christians – that was mostly an aside. I probably tried to cover too much waterfront in one post and didn’t really take the time to get my point across on all the issues.

I thought about commenting on Bill’s article about divorce for Christians, and pointing out the religious community’s response to Mary Winkler murdering her husband in cold blood by shooting him the back with a shotgun – by comforting her and going “there, there, Ms. ‘weaker vessel’, it must have been so traumatic for you.” I can’t see them getting their knickers in a twist over a small matter like adultery when the commandment above it – “thou shalt not kill” (“unless you husband wants to have sex with you and likes you to wear high heels”) – turns out not be really a “commandment”, but more of “pretty good suggestion, if you can manage it. But, if you can’t, that’s OK, too.”

Dalrock has done this subject far more justice than I would ever be able to – he has an insider’s perspective. Check out his blog – particularly his series on re-framing Christian marriage and his take-down of the Christian movie “Fireproof.”

I worked with hard-core addicts back in the 1970s, and learned a lot about people who are users. They would have never gotten as far into their destruction of self and others without people enabling them. All treatment programs which had any success at all (few of them, and very few successes) had zero tolerance for lack of accountability and responsibility.

If you let people slide, many of them will.

There was a sort of mantra among staff, and many of them even had plaques on their wall with the saying on it –
“Those who tolerate sick and intolerable behavior are, to that extent, responsible for it.”

As Ric pointed out above, people who feel that they have been victimized were not completely passive in the process. This woman that I spoke of above behaved in a completely sick and intolerable manner, and I needed to resist both her manipulation and the pressure from a “good Christian man” to excuse and tolerate it.

Fortunately for me, I am enough a of hard-headed, sociopathic, a-hole that I would not cave in to the pressure.

Thus, while I have minor-horror stories about a large number of different women, I have largely escaped the truly horrible punishments this culture visits on husbands and fathers.

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Charles Martel June 28, 2012 at 21:36

zed
I think the only “regret” that Bennett actually feels is “the one that got away.” When the day comes for her that she wants to scale back her career, and indulge her baby-rabies, she may not find another stupid schlub to pick up the check.

That’s what I got from Bennett’s article in the end. Her regret was that she hadn’t monetized her seven year relationship with Mr. Half-Greek in any way. This is because she’s one of the significant minority of careerist feminists that truly believes their own bullshit, that she doesn’t need a man to pay her bills. You could see the glimmer of cognitive dissonance in her article, that she got exactly what she said she wanted, but that winding up with nothing to show for her seven years of sexual service was, umm, oddly disappointing.

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uk Fred June 28, 2012 at 23:55

I can’t see what her problem is. She is just like a previous girlfriend I had and I would have thought that she should be thank ful that she has been allowed to have undisturbed time with the one she loves most and best, herself. I hope when she attempts to facebook friend her ex, he tells her exactly what I told mine, “Thanks, but No thanks!”

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Anonymous Reader June 29, 2012 at 08:08

Zed, the Mary Winkler case is a useful measuring tool. Someone who can’t bring himself or herself to a state of anger over her action is generally revealing their inner gynocentric nature. White Knights will babble on about many irrelevant things, rather than just come out and say “She belongs in prison for life”. Feminists will find some way to blame Rev. Winkler, typically the sex angle. No gynocentrist wants to explain why li’l Mary should have custody of her children, either.

People often blurt out the truth when they are under certain forms of stress; it’s part of many common interrogation techniques that police use. This is why it is important for men to stay centered, and observant, in all arguments – but especially with women. Because if the opponent becomes flustered enough – especially women – then some truth will pop out at an odd moment. The hardest part for me has been to believe what I actually just heard or saw. Yes, she really did just say that, and that is what she’s thinking, no matter how hard she tries to walk it back later, or how fast the waterworks turn on to try to deflect from it.

Hmm. Your personal history give me an idea, maybe one way to deal with shit tests is to escalate them enough to see if she’ll blurt out the truth. Not something I’d want to do on a regular basis, but from time to time it could be useful. I’ll have to think about that for a while.

Finally, I have to agree that Bennett’s article is full of “one that got away” type regret. It just isn’t clear to me if she regrets not being married, or just regrets not getting married – “Her Day”, and all that circus/hooplah. Does she genuinely regret not forming a permanent bond with another human being, or is she sad that a trophy got away, taking Her Day with him?

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WhatsNew June 30, 2012 at 08:11

Ahhhh that man dodged a bullett. A princess…

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Rich July 1, 2012 at 16:15

Well at least a dozen or so of the cats that are homeless and at the animal shelter, now will have a home with her.

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van Rooinek July 2, 2012 at 13:44

I we could find the exboyfriend and hear his side of things.

The male side of “Cheat Betray Leave” was ultimately tracked down, and he had remarried, produced a family, and had a much better life than his betrayer.

Maybe that will be the case here too?

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C July 3, 2012 at 07:11

I just left a relationship of ten years. You just get tired of her BS and controlling ways eventually. It’s nice to have a friend though. Still, this guy finally realized the girl has no depth in her love for him, shallow and empty she was, that’s what happened to me as well. You can tell a person you love them all day, but if you can’t show it in other non-materialistic ways, then they are just not capable. Still, I know guys who have no idea what love is either. Truth be told, the beatles were right, all you need is love, Lennon himself took it up another notch as well.

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Doc July 15, 2012 at 14:00

“Girls are being advised to ‘whore it up’ earlier and earlier.”

And there was much rejoicing… It was about that time – 30 – when I started stacking them up and openly seeing how far I could push things with the 30-ish women – just to see how far they are willing to go. Open sex for me, not for them – no problem, they can live with that. Have them trying to round up young women then call me to “drop by” to have sex with both of them – again not an issue. They started trying to play the – “you don’t have to give up other women to be with me, and I’ll help you bed as many as you want as long as you come back to me” game.

I saw it as more than a bit pathetic but that doesn’t mean that I didn’t and still don’t take advantage of it. Several of the women who have been with me the longest, 5+ years, are the ones who have brought over interns and such that they work with for me to sample. Who am I to turn down a good thing? Of course, I would have to be stupid to lock myself into only one such an arrangement when there are more and more women following the same road. Of course, some of them need some incentive – so they think it’s a way to get what they want, if you drop some hints at the right time… Hey, it’s a way for ME to get what I WANT, and that is all that really matters….

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