The Myth of Equal Suffering

by Pro-male/Anti-feminist Tech on December 19, 2011

When someone is talking about mens’ rights issues or anything that only affects or disproportionately affects men, a common response is some derivative of “women have it just as bad.”  This response will be used no matter how absurd it is when applied to the issue or issues being discussed.  For example, if an MRA is discussing what happens to men during and after divorce, someone will respond that women suffer just as much from divorce. Obviously, this is not the case, because women wouldn’t disproportionately initiate divorce proceedings otherwise. What these people are doing is promoting a myth of equal suffering.

Why do we have a myth of equal suffering?  It is because feminists – and even many anti-feminists (who are really anti-feminist in name only, or AFINOs) – don’t want to admit that there are certain issues (such as divorce) where men bear the overwhelming brunt of the negative impact. Feminists will use this myth in an attempt to shut down any effort to show that their policies and actions are attacking men. AFINOs will also use the myth to hide the fact that women who don’t claim to be feminists are still benefiting from feminism.  For them, it’s an attempt to pretend that the benefits of feminism are going to some far away group of feminist women instead of both feminist women and AFINO women. This can be seen with divorce where women who don’t claim to be feminists divorce as often as self-admitted feminist women do. It can also be seen when someone says, “But feminism hurts women too”.

The myth of equal suffering is not used in the opposite direction. If something were to disproportionately affect women, these people will not talk about how men are suffering just as much from the same problem. This is because the true purpose of the myth of equal suffering is not to demonstrate that men and women suffer equally: it is to diminish problems experienced by men so that women can be shown to be suffering more. This serves the purpose of adding more power to women via victimhood. It is similar to how feminism in general claims to support equality when in reality it is promoting an agenda of female supremacism.

{ 74 comments… read them below or add one }

Opus December 19, 2011 at 05:56

So true, and it puts me in mind of the article on page 2 of this week’s War Cry (the Salvation Army newspaper). This was the story:

A woman had married in 1993 and born her husband two children. In 2000 her husband died of Leukemia, so guess who is suffering the most here? The children? No, of course not. The Man whose life was cut short? Are you kidding! No, as you could see it was the woman, and the hardest thing she ever had to do was explain to her young children that Daddy isn’t coming back (wow life is so tough for females) and as we know children get used to anything in minutes. It’s all about her. The only odd thing is that she does not appear to have found a replacement man, even after ten years.

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Rod December 19, 2011 at 06:06

You’ve hit the nail on the head here. It isn’t only feminists who cling tenaciously to victimhood status. Even where women enjoy clear and objectively obvious advantage (like the majority status they enjoy in college enrollments now), that will often be cast into victimhood. The first time my mother really got on my nerves was when my father was in pain with terminal cancer. It was as if everything she did and said was calculated to draw attention to her suffering (worry, lack of sleep, etc.), and away from his. I wanted to say, “Mom, just let him be the victim for once, OK?” I’ve seen those same tactics played out on many other occasions in many other ways. “No, don’t look at MEN’S suffering/disadvantage; look at MINE.”

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King Alfred December 19, 2011 at 06:14

I realize that this may be controversial, but there may be some truth in the statement that women suffer more than men from the effects of feminism. I don’t mean to minimize men’s suffering in any way; I am fully aware if it, and it is the result of pure evil. But please consider this: Men WANT women. Women NEED men. There is a world of difference between WANT and NEED. If all the women in the world were instantly vaporized, a great many men would be better off. If all the men in the world were instantly vaporized, ALL women would be in BIG trouble. The Biblical “weaker vessel” really is the weaker of the two. Feminism has the uncanny ability to mentally twist SUPERIOR NEED of females into female superiority. I quoted this a few days ago, but here it is again for those who haven’t seen it:

Queen Victoria, 1870:
“I am most anxious to enlist everyone who can speak or write to join in checking this mad, wicked folly of ‘Women’s Rights’, with all its attendant horrors, on which her poor feeble sex is bent, forgetting every sense of womanly feelings and propriety. Feminists ought to get a good whipping. Were women to ‘unsex’ themselves by claiming equality with men, they would become the most hateful, heathen and disgusting of beings, and would surely perish without male protection.”

She would have died if her husband hadn’t taken an assassin’s bullet that was intended for her. She knew what she was talking about and had the courage to admit it.

Basically, all the press doubling down on men to “man up” is really an admission of what Queen Victoria knew: The little dearies really do NEED us. So, the most devastating response to feminism is simply for the maligned man to walk away and let “sweetums” fend for herself.

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Annonymous December 19, 2011 at 06:34

Everything this article says and points to is quite accurate and objectively true, but per Chairman Mao … “you cannot counter tyranical and oppressive power with rationality, objectivity, polite essays or pleadings, aesthetic words, paintings and forms, fine embroidery pleasing to the senses or so delicately refined, so leisurely, so gentle, so temperate, so kind, courteous, restrained and magnanimous at all times.”

No. A revolution is an insurrection of the oppressed, and an act of ongoing violence by which one class overthrows another by whatever means that are nescessary … And in gendertopia, there is no class so oppressed, so violated, so abused and so missused to the extent of his voluntary disposability of self, as the all mighty man.

Others may have a different opinion.

If men of whatever station, pride or rank don’t implicitly and correctly understand these true sources and origins of their own low moral status, to be something organised and mantained by their own efforts and exertions … their sons, their grandsons and their great grandsons in turn, are destined to inherit this mantle, this stigma and this burden of eternal social inferiority forever.

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Opus December 19, 2011 at 06:38

@King Alfred

I like what you write, so much so that I wish I had written it myself, but one thing puzzles me: Are you suggesting that Queen Victoria’s husband, Albert of Saxe-Coburg who incidentally died 150 years ago last week was shot defending his wife? I had always previously understood that he died a natural though tragically young death. Victoria never remarried.

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Aharon December 19, 2011 at 06:41

“AFINOs” anti-feminist in name only

— Thats great. It’s like the acronym RHINO or republican in name only.
And a WINO is a wife or woman in name only.

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Nugganu December 19, 2011 at 06:57

I think I would tend to agree – that women suffer quite a lot from feminism, the only difference being, they are quite unaware of it. Only when it’s too late, and a woman finds herself alone, childless, and well past her expiry date for having children, will she discover how duped she was.

I’m seeing it all the time, amongst my female friends, and we’re also seeing the fruit of it in the proliferation of ‘man-up’ articles being written. Women do suffer the ill effects of feminism, watch over the next couple years as spinsterhood reaches pandemic proportions. The women born in the 70s are now entering their 40s. I see it everywhere I look.

My own ex is a victim of it, it’s too late for her – she’s a constant victim of pump-and-dumps.

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King Alfred December 19, 2011 at 07:25

@ Opus

Albert was not killed by the bullet; in fact, it is not clear that he was even injured. He later died from an illness.
Thanks for the fact check. Although the film Young Victoria shows him being shot, there is no evidence that he was actually injured in the attack. He did act to protect Victoria. Here is an account of what happened: http://www.historyhouse.co.uk/articles/queen_victoria_assasination.html

The part about him being shot was apparently a Hollywood dramatization.

The overall point of my comment still holds, even if the example I selected is not historically accurate. I will try to be more careful to check my facts in the future. My apologies.

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Stoltz December 19, 2011 at 07:43

I was watching a Subway commercial the other day with my 8yr old daughter, and reality hit me pretty hard. The commercial goes like this:

1. Office (cubicle) setting. Geek-looking man sitting down getting ready to enjoy his Subway sandwich. An attractive woman sitting in cubicle near him also with a Subway sandwich.
2. Every person in the commercial is an adult, but talks in a child’s voice (subbed over). Very important.
3. An attractive woman walks up to the man and starts berating him about giving a sandwich to the woman sitting in the cubicle (I can’t remember the exact dialogue).
4. The woman then walks away, but before leaving the scene, she shakes her head and says “MEN!”

My daughter watched the commercial, smirked a little, and then said “Men” as well. Now besides the obvious (that is, the brainwashing commercials inflict upon people – even children – with things such as beauty [women] vs. ‘geekiness/beta-ness’ [men], control, etc), I turned to my daughter and said, “You mean, WOMEN.” She thought for a second and said, “Yeah.”

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Opus December 19, 2011 at 07:54

@King Alfred

I am indebted – so often one is convinced one knows the facts only to discover one is mistaken – to ones chagrin, but on this occasion Hollywood is to blame, though I take your overall point, and undoubtedly Alfred would happily have taken the bullet.

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Taqman December 19, 2011 at 07:57

I have a perfect example of this:

Why young couples aren’t getting married — they fear the ravages of divorce

Notice how they use the word “they” in the title, they can’t admit that it is primarily men who fear divorce.

However if you read the article you find out that their own data contradicts the title. Women don’t really fear divorce most of all, but rather fear the restraints of marriage.

Working-class women, in particular, view marriage less favorably than do their male and middle-class counterparts, in part because they see marriage as hard to exit and are reluctant to assume restrictive gender roles.

This is something that those of us on the manosphere are well aware of. Young women dislike marriage because it make carousel riding more difficult. The authors tried to equate this “suffering” with the much more severe consequences for a man who ends up in a bad marriage.

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Lara December 19, 2011 at 08:05

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keyster December 19, 2011 at 08:52

“You’re GENERALIZING!”

That’s the common retort meant to shut down the debate. In other words as long as there are some women suffering somewhere, it effects us ALL. (As long as a battalion of soldiers contains a few female clerks it must be referred to as “our brave men and women in the military”.)

It’s perfectly acceptable for them to claim something “disproportionately effects women”, because this get’s everyone’s attention. When anything disproportionately effects men, as long as there are a few women effected as well, it’s everyone’s problem. It stirs our innate need to help them.

Exceptions for this are clearly made for negative actions such as crime and violence. Men are bad is not a generalization because it’s known to be true. Bad women are merely statistical outliers that shouldn’t be considered.

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Bill December 19, 2011 at 08:54

I’m not sure where you get the idea of “equal suffering”. Most of the women I know are convinced as a matter of principle that women have suffered far more than men over the Millenia and that modern men must pay the price of standing back and letting women “have it all” for the rest of time.

(Women of course fail to understand that ‘standing back and letting women “have it all”‘ means that men need to work extra hard to create jobs that allow women to earn substantial salaries while only contributing what little work women are willing to do while still remaining feminine.)

Insofar as women do believe that they suffer as much as men, their belief is based on a false premise: namely, that they can imagine what it is like to be men. Women are not, as they sometimes propagandize, just like men except that they can have babies. Women are nothing like men. Men are the self-organizing (sorry, ladies, there is no separate entity called the “Patriarchy” that tells men what to do) creative and intuitive geniuses of humanity. Since women are nothing like men, they cannot possibly know that they suffer equally, either in terms of feelings or in terms of what men are forced to do to survive.

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Craig Himself December 19, 2011 at 09:07

And the hits just keep coming. Booya, sir.

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Lara December 19, 2011 at 09:30

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Ken December 19, 2011 at 09:53

The only “suffering” women have nowadays is that they are not getting MORE out of men via feminist/misandry laws, rulings, etc.
They are all on “milk-the-cow-milk-the-cow” mode and squawking about not getting “enough”, them being “equal” and all!

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Eject, eject! December 19, 2011 at 10:00

Women are all for ‘equal’ suffering — just as long as men suffer the most, and it is publicised the least.

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keyster December 19, 2011 at 10:08

“…they cannot possibly know that they suffer equally, either in terms of feelings or in terms of what men are forced to do to survive.”

A moral equivelance has been established as in:

Men dying = Women suffering; fearful or uncomfortable.
Men dead = Women being raped or sexually assaulted.

The lead story of Bosnia as an example was not the thousands of men and boys lined up at giant ditches only to be shot in the back. It was the rape of women, and that some of these women commited suicide. The death of the men was secondary to the suffering of the women, because woman’s pain elicits more interest, emotion and compassion.

Men actually dying pales in comparison to the suffering of the women left behind, who also happen to still be alive to talk about it. There can be no compassion for men as long as women are incapable of it, preferring instead to protect their own self-interest.

The sea-change that’s slowly boiling is that men are losing compassion for women, to protect their own self-interest. This is a grand shift in the social structure of civilization, that’s never happened before now. This is what feminism did.

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Rocco December 19, 2011 at 11:15

@ Keyster

This change was 150 years in the making…..the change back will not happen in my lifetime.

Women decided 150 years ago to ignore Queen Victoria and give up the feminine while failing to acheive the purpose of the masculine which is to assist in society…..to be giving…..the ones risking their lives are not war mongers, although, IMO, they’re pussy beggars and fools.

Women have nothing to offer except debt and emotional abuse including stealing your children, leaving you a slave for 20 years, the best years of your life……

What a great scam.

I have compassion for women…..who are related to me.

I wouldn’t piss on a woman if I saw her on fire in the streat.

A female friend of mine was mauled by two pitt bulls last week and was shocked that the crowd just watched, men included.

Like Lara says, they don’t need us, we just need to leave them alone….like the little rascals in reverse…….you go Darla!

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Enrico from Italy December 19, 2011 at 11:41

@Rocco

Women have nothing to offer except debt and emotional abuse including stealing your children, leaving you a slave for 20 years, the best years of your life……
Like Lara says, they don’t need us, we just need to leave them alone….like the little rascals in reverse…….you go Darla!
—————————————————————-
Well said!

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The Trend December 19, 2011 at 12:07

Lets not forget colleges- yes yes…women are getting the majority of college degrees which (of course) proves that all women are all better at all things than all men at all times but you take your life in your hands if you suggest rolling back any of the female preference policies on campus or doing ANYTHING for men in schools especially the rigged K-12 system that blatantly favors girls.

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Little John December 19, 2011 at 12:09

Laura:

Oh so we men are so bloodthirsty and violent? Really. Yet each year in the U.S., women, usually for the sake of convenience, murder 1.2 million unborn babies. Bloody indeed.

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Larry December 19, 2011 at 12:42

Lara: “We don’t want men to protect us.”

Alright, run right down to the post office, sign a draft registration form and support new law that requires it of all women. After that, your claim might gain tacit correlation with reality.

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DCM December 19, 2011 at 13:18

“Lara December 19, 2011 at 08:05

We don’t want men to protect us.

All we want is men not to attacking us. That simple.”

I promise I will neither attack nor protect you if we ever happen to be
in the same place.

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Anonymous December 19, 2011 at 13:27

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Anonymous December 19, 2011 at 13:35

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The Truth December 19, 2011 at 14:07

Lara, you really haven’t thought your posts through. Your lack of attention to facts as well as grammar has proven as much.

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Taqman December 19, 2011 at 14:59

Once again Lara has derailed the thread, vote her down and ignore her.

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Avenger December 19, 2011 at 15:28

Alfred- Prince Albert was never shot and that was obviously a Hollywod invention in that film you saw. It’s a pity that most people believe these films because in general they have a negative impact on men. I’m sure that most females believe that men have always been drunkards who beat their wives or went around raping women based on these films.
Film is the best way of shaping public opinion and for propaganda (as Hitler who was a pioneer in this matter knew)
There’s a saying that a picture is worth a thousand words;then a film must be worth a million. When you see something it makes a direct imprint on the primitive emotional areas of the brain to the extent that even though logiccaly you know it’s only a fake film with actors you still are greatly influenced and biased by what you saw.
Reading something is entirely different. First, you have to learn how to read, while seeing things is natural and is passively recorded in the brain. It may take you a second to read a sentence but the brain must go through certain stages before it makes any sense. Very simply, you’re looking at a white piece of paper with black marks on it. You’ve learned that these marks are letters and that a combination of them is a word and then a collection of words is a sentence Then you get some idea or conjure up an image in your mind.
The monopoly who run the media and films are brainwashing people, especially kids, constantly, so that they’re predisposed to believe or favour certain ideas. These are the sort of people who sit on juries where some fictional show like Law and Order may influence them more than the actual evidence in the case they’re hearing. If it’s some rape case they’ve probabaly seen a 100 shows where the evil man is raping the innocent female and they have an anti male bias even before they hear the facts.
Before films it was harder to brainwash people because the average person only knew reality and what he observed everyday and pretty much saw female behaviour first hand not in some unreal or idealised depiction in a film.

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Leichhardt December 19, 2011 at 15:37

There are two trends I notice growing these days:

The “MAN UP!” trend, perpetuated by the booming population of feminist daughters, realizing that The Daddy State is losing his generousity, due to the economic crisis, and that the life of a career girl is not all that fun, as their mommies promised it will be. So they are desperately and forcibly looking for rich and marriable “private sector investors”.

The “GAY IS OK!” trend, perpetuated by western leftist governments, realizing that homosexual population is substantially smaller and therefore cheaper to “antidiscriminate” than the population of “poor dearies”. (Sorry, grrrl, you are fired from public sector paper clip department assistant manger job. But, hey, take it easy, you can still marry another grrrl and get a baby from sperm bank for free. Now, are we progressive or what? Remember to vote for us on the next elections.)

I wonder how this will continue.

Will “marriage starved” feminist daughters start to burn rainbow flags, crash pride parades and forcibly cure homosexual men with whipping, cold water and electroshocks?

Or will men start to fake homosexuality (like those two guys in Chuck&Larry movie) in droves, to gain state enforced immunity from female marrige pushers?

My, my, my, what an interesting age I live in!

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Avenger December 19, 2011 at 15:54

A female friend of mine was mauled by two pitt bulls last week and was shocked that the crowd just watched, men included

Are you sure that wasn’t a crowd of females?

Personally, whether it was a man or woman being attacked and I had my gun or some spray I would have done something. And I’d be endangering myself because I’d have to shoot them at point blank range of a few feet so as to not hit the victim. The dog could also attack me when it sees me coming and it’s not so easy to hit a running dog. If wounded they don’t go into shock like a normal dog and will still keep attacking until they’ve lost a lot of blood. In my opinion these bloodlines should be eliminated because these mutant animals are worse than wolves. Sure, there may be vicious toy poodles but they can’t really do any damage to an adult with their bite and they still behave like a normal dog so if you kicked them they’d run away.

OK, now watch all of the pit bull nuts tell me why I’m wrong and how gentle their dog is (probably a golden retriever mix lol)

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freebird December 19, 2011 at 16:19

@Avenger:
You would be arrested for shooting the dog.
Only our masters in blue have the prerogative of using force these days.

So unless you’re a cop, you should know better.

Now if you laid down and exposed your throat to save a girl that would be heroic!

But not for a little boy, that would just be creepy.

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Leichhardt December 19, 2011 at 16:20

Mark my words of prophecy, brethren:

After the fall of communism, Russia became the world’s leading exporter of brides.

After the fall of femminism, America will become the world’s leading exporter of prostitutes.

Welcome to the global market, cupcakes!

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Anonymous age 69 December 19, 2011 at 16:45

>>Women don’t really fear divorce most of all, but rather fear the restraints of marriage.

You may miss the point of this. Women may be afraid of divorce, because they are generally too st*pid to know that women themselves file most divorces, and most of the time it is because they want the man they are banging in an adulterous relationship. And, only with a calculator to see how much money they will get.

So, the unmarried women think divorce happens like catching the flu or something.

I even encounter feminists who will not admit women live longer on average than men do.

@Lara:>> All we want is men not to attacking us. That simple.

Do you get attacked a lot? If so, perhaps you should be more discriminatory about whom you associate with. Few men attack women, and few women are attacked by anyone. Women are more violent than men are. The human race has survived only because men are stronger than women.

@Lara: >>Yeah, men are unique organizing and creating,,,,,war, conflict, aggression, destruction, violence, bombs,,,,,

Walk over to the window and look out. Everything you see out there was either made or invented by men, and usually both made AND invented by men.

The streets. The street lights. The sidewalks. The cars; trucks; and motorcycles driving by. The electric wires. The telephone wires. The cable TV wires. The water pipes under the ground. The sewage pipes under the ground. The storm sewers. Anything else you see out there that is made by humans was invented or made by men.

The floor or carpet you walked on to get to the window was almost certainly installed by men. The window was installed by men. The wall the window is in was installed by men. The foundation of the building was installed by men.

The electrical wires in your building were installed by men. The telephone was invented by a man. The computer and its software you are using to read this was invented by men.The climate control which keeps you comfortable was invented and developed by a man.

If everything made or invented by men were removed, you would be looking at native plants from the entrance of your cave. And, you would be hungry and cold and wearing rabbit skins.

If you want to see what it’s like when women are in charge, visit your local slum, preferably at midnight if you dare. Every town over 10,000 people has a well known place like this.

The yards will be unmowed and littered with junk. Houses will be boarded up. Burned cars will be lying in the streets. Nobody has a job; except for prostitution; pimping; burglary; and dealing drugs. Every house you see is a female headed household.

Find the best part of your town, where the streets are clean, the yards are well maintained; the houses are in great shape. Most of these houses belong to male headed households.

For forty years, every male has had to listen daily to a litany of male failings and evils. Yet, everything I have written here is absolute truth.

>>The sea-change that’s slowly boiling is that men are losing compassion for women, to protect their own self-interest. This is a grand shift in the social structure of civilization, that’s never happened before now. This is what feminism did.

Actually, it may have happened before. In fact, it may have destroyed all major civilizations in history. It has been reported by historians on MRA boards that the Roman Empire went through the same thing. The dearies got the vote, demanded all sorts of goodies like no-fault divorce; large property settlements, and the men stopped marrying. So, the Emperor passed a law that men who did not marry by age 35 were to lose all their properties. So, they started marrying foreign women. And, stopped volunteering to work for the good of the empire.

@anonymous >>I understand that most divorces are caused by adultery, and as it is the women that file for divorce, it is safe to assume that the divorce was caused by a husband’s cheating.

FEMINIST ALERT! FEMINIST ALERT!

Please, please don’t be stupid on a men’s board. Women file for divorce BECAUSE OF THEIR OWN ADULTERY, because they want the other man. So, it is NOT safe except in your twisted misandrist brain to assume the divorce was caused by a husband’s cheating. I supplied no-fee counseling to over 1,600 divorced men over a ten year period. I never encountered one case of a woman who filed who had not already had sex with the other man.

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Leichhardt December 19, 2011 at 17:01

On a lighter note:

I couldn’t fail to notice the growing hysteria surrounding “2012 Mayan doomsday prophecy”. And the fact that women are much more prone to it than men. So, let me add my two prophetic (heh) cents to the topic.

The following year might have 2 stages:

BEFORE DOOMSDAY STAGE:

Great number of women will behave like there is no tomorrow.

Firstly, many women will try to “live out all their fantasies”, female alcohol consumption will skyrocket, vagina prices in casual sex market will plummet into the abbys and PUAs will have a ball of their lifetimes.

Secondly, many women will try to prepare for entering the nirvana, by increased ingagement in meditation and spirituality. That is good news, because they will lose interest in bashing every male that comes their way. They will “forget and forgive and make peace with man kind on its death bed”, so to speak.

To sum it up, it will be a black year for feminist ideals all over western civilization.

AFTER DOOMSDAY STAGE:

In the morning of December 22, 2012, hundreds of millions of women will wake up and realizing that the world is still here, with all its problems. That in the last months they have been behaving like insane drunk cheap whores and the witnesses of their behavior are still alive out there somewhere. And that the man kind they have so generously made peace with “on its death bed” is still alive and kicking and “oppressing” them.

What will ensue, will be the largest collective hissy fit in the history of the planet Earth.

We can expect explosion of female suicide rates. Female psych wards will have to put up “tent departmets” to cater all the newcomers. Antidepressants and sedatives will run out of supply within days. Female alcohol consumption will go into stratosphere. Lesbians will strangle their partners. Black single mum will turn against white barren spinster. Mother will disown her daughter. Daughter will denounce her mother. Sisters will gauge each other’s eyes out with bare nails…

…and the first dawn of 2013 will proudly rise over the planet where feminism once has been but it is no more. :)

I hope and wish you all here to live to see that dawn.

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Anonymous December 19, 2011 at 17:01

Lara’s comment:

We don’t want men to protect us.

All we want is men not to attacking us. That simple.

So what was Lara’s lazy ass doing on her eighteenth birthday and every day until she turned twenty-seven? You will be attacked until you admit that you made every excuse in the book for not demanding Selective Service or other mandatory conscription registration for females. Thank you for bringing that up, Larry. She probably uses her biological sex as a disability and whines about what would happen to her in combat. B??-h??, t?? bad, s? sad.

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DCM December 19, 2011 at 17:37

“Anonymous December 19, 2011 at 13:27

I understand that most divorces are caused by adultery, and as it is the women that file for divorce, it is safe to assume that the divorce was caused by a husband’s cheating. Isn’t it a bit hypocritical to violate the wedding vows and then cry when women do not want to be married to a man that is not committed to his wedding vows?”

Divorces are caused by females being rewarded by the courts.
All females intend to get at least a couple of divorces before gravity takes its toll so they can get property, possibly insurance and bills paid off if not child support from at least a couple of men.
Children give the female influence with grandparents plus guaranteed income for 18 years and the possibility of getting more if the father’s income increases.
Females plan each divorce ahead with female friends and relatives and the lawyer.

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Rmaxd December 19, 2011 at 17:47

@anon 69

“I supplied no-fee counseling to over 1,600 divorced men over a ten year period. I never encountered one case of a woman who filed who had not already had sex with the other man.”

Great post anon 69 as always .. but that last bit wow … lol

I’ve always stated women dont really know how to love men, you just proved it …

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tiredofitall December 19, 2011 at 17:51

“The sea-change that’s slowly boiling is that men are losing compassion for women, to protect their own self-interest. This is a grand shift in the social structure of civilization, that’s never happened before now. This is what feminism did.” – keyster

Reminds me of something Eternal Bachelor said a while back:

“What will be feminism’s greatest ‘achievement’ is that, against all the odds, it managed to invade, remove and destroy the ancient desire in men to actually give a flying fuck about women. An ancient desire that was only put there by generations of a Patriarchy.

Well done fembots. Round of a-bastard-pplause! Bravo!”

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Rmaxd December 19, 2011 at 17:56

The Top rated comments …

Why young couples aren’t getting married
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2076013/Why-young-couples-arent-getting-married–fear-ravages-divorce.html

“It’s simple really. Would you go into business with someone where the business contract you both signed wasn’t worth the paper it was written on? Would you invest every last thing you possessed into such a business knowing that your business partner could fold up tent at any given time for any given reason and ruin you? What fool would? And yet this is how business is done in the current state of marriage. There needs to be an alternative to no fault divorce. It’s time to bring some sanity and reality back into the equation.

- William, San Antonio, Texas, 19/12/2011 ”

“Thats right. I don’t have or want children so I see no reason to get married. I have in the past lost half my house to an ex which I had started saving for from the age of 16 by doing two jobs and she who brought nothing to the table walked away with half the proceeds. Typical British (in)justice. I am not going there again. I am very happy living with my current lovely girlfriend but if we were to split up, which i can’t see as a possibility any time soon, I get to keep whats mine and she gets what is hers and if she hasn’t chosen to spend her hard earned on property but instead on 1000′s of pairs of shoes thats her business but not my problem. Than God Maggie got rid of commonlaw wife in England and Wales so she would have no legal right to any of my possessions. They still have it in Scotland though.

- I’m all right Jack, Wiltshire, 19/12/2011 “

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andybob December 19, 2011 at 19:17

Mr Tech must have been a fly on the wall during a recent exchange between myself and an earnest AFINO female aquaintance who should have known better than to try this ‘subterfuge’ with an MRA.

I was venting my anger about my best mate having to fight for his children and property when his ex-wife divorced him. She utilized every state-provided weapon at her disposal: false DV allegations, attempts at alienating his children, fraud – the lot.

The female aquaintance cut me off mid-rant to inform me that, “that happens to women too.” She then gave me the following two examples:

1) Woman A was sued for maintenance by someone she had taken in and basically adopted as a kind of surrogate ‘child’. (After a little digging, it seems that the surrogate child was a grown-arse woman, obviously exploiting a lonely older female. By the way, the grifter lost the case, incurring all costs).

2) Woman B was sued for a property settlement by her unmarried male ex-partner. The woman settled out-of-court – so unfair, sob. (More digging, and it emerged that the male had been paying the mortgage and every other bill for years. Oh, and this was in 1978, when it was still possible (if rare) for a judge to issue a reasonably fair settlement in Australia).

Like Mr Tech, and numerous men here, I have encountered this kind of derailing many times before. I pointed out that in all her decades of experience (she’s 50-something), she could not think of a single example of a woman being the victim of an unfair court settlement by a man. I could easily recall at least 2 dozen male victims of anti-male bias in divorce/family court – and that’s just within my aquaintance.

I asked her why she was unable to agree with me that my friend was getting a typically raw deal, choosing instead to bring up not one, but two, ludicrous ‘examples’ of this, “happening to women too.” She made some lame comment about ‘sharing’ her experiences.

“So, why didn’t you choose to tell me about some of the many examples you know about men being fucked over? And that includes your own brother whose cunt of an ex-wife refused to allow him to see his 10 year-old daughter as he lay dying of a brain tumor.”

Why?

Read Mr Tech: “…it is to diminish problems experienced by men so that women can be shown to be suffering more.”

Defending Team Vagina trumped all other concerns. I told her that her response demonstrated to me that women just don’t give a shit about men. This upset her, but I wanted to point out that it was improper of her to focus on some random women she barely knew, instead of the late kid brother she claims to have loved so much.

Most women possess little in the way of empathy and loyalty. (Note to younger dudes: demand these qualities in the women in your life – but avoid disappointment by never actually expecting them.)

All this sounds a bit harsh, and I wish it hadn’t happened. However, I expect women in my circle to understand that, like many men, I demand that women acknowledge the inequities forced on us by feminism. Don’t allow any woman to undermine such a fair and reasonable expectation with some lame, “women have it just as bad” attitude.

It is a lie. Call them on it.

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Art Vandelay December 19, 2011 at 19:45

I understand that most divorces are caused by adultery, and as it is the women that file for divorce, it is safe to assume that the divorce was caused by a husband’s cheating.

Even if that were remotely true, what about the whore he cheated with? So it stands to reason that even in this case a woman is still 50% at fault. Lawyered.

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Jimbo December 19, 2011 at 20:01

I was married for four years, but have been lucky to get custody of my two children, both boys. But, with having first endured a living nightmare. As I look at divorced women today, I can’t help but wonder as they frequently walk around in la di da di da fashion”What kind of hell did they put their husbands through?” They are too ignorant to realize what I’m thinking or that there has got to be millions of men who are no different than I am. It just about makes it extra rewarding to pump and dump them just to exact a little revenge on behalf of the poor bastard that had the misfortune to be married to the crazy bitch.

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Avenger December 19, 2011 at 20:57

If everything made or invented by men were removed, you would be looking at native plants from the entrance of your cave. And, you would be hungry and cold and wearing rabbit skins.

@69- I think yu’re being too generous here. First they’d have to be able kill a rabbit and skin it. But you cant’s just sew animal skins together whether hides or furs because the skin will rot and decay in a few days. It has to first be treated and preserved before using it. You can be sure that it was a man who invented tanning and developed the chemical process to do it well and to have the intelligence and patience to keep experimenting with various substances until he got it right.

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Bob Smith December 19, 2011 at 22:25

“Working-class women, in particular, view marriage less favorably than do their male and middle-class counterparts, in part because they see marriage as hard to exit”

That’s seriously bizarre. In what sense is marriage hard to exit for a woman?

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TFH December 19, 2011 at 23:03

Paging Uncle Elmer :

At ForbesWoman, another article demanding that 50% of Corporate Directors be female :

http://www.forbes.com/sites/forbeswomanfiles/2011/12/19/for-companies-it-pays-to-have-women-on-the-board/

They virtually write the same stupid article each week.

In this one, a particular gem. They say that more women in management leads to ‘more corporate philanthropy’. Therefore, it ‘pays to have women at the top’.

Wait, so a corporation paying out more to nonprofits (undoubtedly to FEMINIST nonprofits) somehow ‘pays off for the corporation’?

These people are getting stupider by the day.

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Rorschach December 20, 2011 at 03:53

The recent reports about women protesters being beaten in Egypt are an excellent example of the “it’s only important when it happens to women” mentality.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/africaandindianocean/egypt/8967424/Hillary-Clinton-says-Egypt-is-failing-its-women.html

Hillary the bigot completely ignores the fact that men are being beaten and even killed because she’s just so upset about the women.

In the video at the top of the article you can see a man and woman being viciously attacked – but it’s actually the man who is attacked for longer and one of the police jumps on him with both feet. According to the article you’d think it was only a woman being attacked.

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E December 20, 2011 at 04:04

Bill

I’m not sure where you get the idea of “equal suffering”. Most of the women I know are convinced as a matter of principle that women have suffered far more than men over the Millenia and that modern men must pay the price of standing back and letting women “have it all” for the rest of time.

I think you’ve just described 50% of what college is all about. Back when I was in college, my major was engineering. Math and science classes make poor vehicles for spreading feminist ideas. A degree in engineering, despite it’s fearsome reputation for being heavy on the hard sciences, still requires plenty of “elective” classes so yeah even I received my fair share of feminist bullshit teachings. I can only imagine how much more brainwashing I would of received had I majored in something non-STEM related.

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Ray Manta December 20, 2011 at 04:51

Avenger wrote:
I think yu’re being too generous here. First they’d have to be able kill a rabbit and skin it.

Even hunter-gatherers are incredibly dependent on technical expertise to survive. Videos of bushmen doing persistence hunting are instructive. The men doing it can’t just rely on endurance; they need to develop the skill to single out an animal and run it to exhaustion. It’s an ability that takes years to acquire.

So if women didn’t have men to rely on, I don’t think they’d be just reduced to wearing animal skins. I think humans would have died out.

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Lara Zhivago December 20, 2011 at 05:27

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

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Avenger December 20, 2011 at 05:49

TFH
At ForbesWoman, another article demanding that 50% of Corporate Directors be female

Well, that’s never going to happen. The shareholders elect the chairman at the shareholders meeting and he appints the boardor in some cases they’re elected too. Many shareholers are females who either inherited the shares from their father/mother or husband and apparently they dn’t want to put many females in especially in the high positions. I guess when it comes to their own money and their stock’s value and dividends they’re not so eager to allow a female to control it.

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andybob December 20, 2011 at 06:26

What’s with all the downvotes? Oh…hi Lara.

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Murray December 20, 2011 at 09:21

I’ve seen this. Up to the point where the situation can be framed as disfavorable to women, feminists and their auxiliaries use an inequality-o-meter which can register and highlight the slightest 0.000001% bias. The inequality-o-meter stops at 50%, though.

If the situation is favorable to women and can’t be framed in any other way even by advocates and professional grievance entrepreneurs, the focus becomes aggregate and broadgrained, and discourages any effort at precise analysis. They’ll talk about swings and roundabouts, they’ll talk about six of one and half a dozen of the other, they’ll talk about localized advantages and disadvantages that more or less even out when you add them up.

This encouragement to look at the world in a broadgrained, indeed blurred way, is typically made to go down by a good dose of “man-up”: noting inequalities makes you a whiner, a man takes his knocks in the world and doesn’t complain.

When women are disadvantaged, the argument will be for interventionism, legislation, judicial intervention, and social engineering. When men are disadvantaged, the same people will adopt laissez-faire attitudes, and will be happy to let social and market forces find their own level.

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Lara Zhivago December 20, 2011 at 12:35

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

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Roxanne December 20, 2011 at 13:18

The pain of loss from a divorce, even outside the financial, is a very ugly reality for men in that situation. I never saw my father more vulnerable and lost as I did when the mother filed for divorce. She let him keep the house, and my youngest brother, so he didn’t suffer from most of the typical financial backlash of divorce. Regardless of that fact, he was shattered for a long time, even now that he’s somewhat back to normal (they have been divorced for about 13 yrs) he still does not date, and who could blame him? They had been married for 23 yrs at the time she filed. My Dad worked hard to take care of us, sometimes 70 hours in a week, never hit the mother, and in my personal opinion, spoiled her as rotten as a working class guy could. What he got in return was his wife having an affair with a 20 something yr old guy, a wife who told outrageous lies to their children in a effort to turn us against him (that is a very sordid story in of itself that I guess I will save for another article on parental alienation), and divorce papers. Although my Dad hasn’t taken the Red Pill as of yet, he does appear to be going his own way – he has made my brothers, my children, and I the center of his world. I wish he could have the personal happiness he deserves with an equally deserving woman, but in the world we live in I don’t see that happening for him. I would even be happy for him if he was getting some pump and dump action – but I don’t think he’s willing to take the risk in that arena either. He deserves so much more than what he ended up with.

PS: sorry for the personal rant, but I imagine my Dad’s situation is not an isolated incident for men of his age.

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DCM December 20, 2011 at 13:27

“Lara Zhivago December 20, 2011 at 05:27
………………
PS: Don’t know who the other Lara is; but she ain’t me.”

Oh, she made you look bad?

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Geography Bee Finalist himself December 20, 2011 at 16:43

@ DCM

Lara made Lara zHIVago look bad by using her one extra brain cell (out of Lara’s two brain cells) to not make the Freudian slip of having a screen name that includes HIV embedded within the middle of it.

My guess is that Lara zHIVago did not spend her formative years as a girl from sub-Saharan Africa. Do I imagine that she is a racist white woman? Oh yeah.

She clearly is incapable of comprehending that feminism is the HIV of social movements in that it has no beneficial effect on any society it touches, just as the high prevalence of HIV in southern Africa provides no benefit there. Lara zHIVago’s screen name is a slap in the face to: Nelson Mandela, who lost his son Makgatho to AIDS;
to Joshua Nkomo, one of the freedom fighters in Zimbabwe who lost his son Ernest to the same disease;
to Graça Machel, the only spouse of more than one elected head of state of more than one country (widow of Mozambican president Samora Machel and third wife of Nelson Mandela) who lost her brother-in-law Boaventura from her first marriage;
Mangosotho Buthelezi, the head of the opposition to Nelson Mandela during Mandela’s term as South Africa’s first black president, who lost both a son and daughter to HIV;
and Kenneth Kaunda of Zambia, the first African head of state to disclose the death of a family member of his due to AIDS, namely his son Masuzyo

Remember that Lara zHIVago probably would not care if even Ellen Johnson-Sirleaf of Liberia, the first black African female elected head of state, lost a family member to AIDS. Remember that the MRM needs whatever support it can get, including people at the base of the the socioeconomic pyramid.

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Common Monster December 20, 2011 at 17:58

PMAFT is undoubtably right on the mark. However, there’s more going on than just “promoting a myth of equal [or greater] suffering, women who try and pull that sort of sheet are changing the subject. Back to them and their concerns. Wimminz first, always, and all that jazz.

IRL, the impulse to downvote translates into calling ‘em on this in no uncertain terms, since the idea is to stay on track. Masochists are always going to be suffering over one thing or another. That’s why they’re called woe-men!

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MRA December 20, 2011 at 20:12

@TFH from the link

epic Comment
“What I also don’t get is why do some women try so hard to belong to a club that according to them doesn’t want them? Why not fund their own startups and put the proverbial shoe on the other foot by hiring mostly women and minorities? I think the chances of getting a good position is way better than trying to climb the ladder in one of the dinosaur companies where 90% of the game is dilbertesque politics anyways. Getting onto the board or senior executive level of a Fortune 500 is a pipe dream. It’s probably around 10.000 positions total we are talking about here. The odds of dying by gunshot are way higher (especially for minority men).”

It is very easy, women don’t create jobs, women are not innovators as men, they just are designed (from feminist point of view) to wait for men to build and then they demand be on the top, many men failed compare to the few who become successful businessmen, Steve Jobs and bill and Gates weren’t the only men working on computer field, but feminist DEMAND a no failed businesswomen, what they really want is just because you are a women you can fail or work under male authority, >>feminist hate see women taking orders from men<<.

Why aren't more geeks girls? where are the women nerds? why girls in high school don't date the nerdy boy? why every time a man start talking about tech they say is boring? why aren't women watching science channel?

Lets make an experiment, take off all the fashion and gossip magazines from every supermarket, store, grocery etc and replace with STEM focus magazine and see how many women buy it.

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Lara Zhivago December 20, 2011 at 23:55

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

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Art Vandelay December 21, 2011 at 00:04

It is very easy, women don’t create jobs, women are not innovators as men, they just are designed (from feminist point of view) to wait for men to build and then they demand be on the top

Well it’s not unlike most marriages and relationships isn’t it? The men build their career and wealth and the woman just latches on. Then, when the divorce comes half of it all is hers, because ‘she supported him’, of course lacking the second point, “she supported him like no other woman could”. I don’t think Tiger Woods ex wife was as world class a wife as he was a golfer.

It’s very parasitic, these feminists are in fact engaging in polygamy. They don’t just feel entitled to a good husband who can provide for them, they also feel entitled to a corporation as a second husband (corporations are people too you know) and of course if that doesn’t pan out they want the government as husband.

I’m kelvarnsen on forbes btw…

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Lara Zhivago December 21, 2011 at 00:17

Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

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Lara Zhivago December 21, 2011 at 00:38

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Geography Bee Finalist himself December 21, 2011 at 02:29

“None of the African women address”

@ Lara zHIVago

I hate to tell you this, but YeMENi women are from a country in Asia. YeMEN is a country on the Arabian peninsula in Asia that borders Saudi Arabia and oMAN. Now if Tawakkol KarMAN was Moroccan, Algerian, Tunisian, Libyan, or Egyptian, your clause would be both grammatically and geographically correct.

Still, nobody buys your story and I’m sure you hurt your lone brain cell fabricating it.

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Höllenhund December 21, 2011 at 08:41

Why the hell is Lara tolerated here? She adds nothing of value to the discussion.

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Opus December 21, 2011 at 09:09

Today we have yet another example of women suffering more than men. These are the facts:

We are fighting a war against the Afghanis (again) and therefore men are out in Afghanistan being shot at, so their wives (organised by Gareth – a man) – have got together to sing a song which has been recorded and is now, inexplicably – to me at any rate – shooting up the charts. There is a YouTube clip of these ‘Military Wives’ who have been to see the Prime Minister (another man). So who is suffering? Yes, you guessed – I’m not awarding prizes – the wives! Perhaps someone in the military would care to remind me what the divorce rate is for military wives, for you can be certain that even if one of their husbands are killed there will be plenty of men ready to take their husbands place. One of the wives (Scottish accent) was interviewed – she had, she said previously been ‘a meek little wife’ – obviously marraige and to a soldier at that is bad for self-confidence – but now she is feeling empowered. Funny what a chart success does and lots of attention does for ones self-image.

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DCM December 21, 2011 at 12:57

I, too, support both Laras’ right to their own opinions but I’d like for them to express those opinions in a more useful manner.

I, too, plan to refuse the Nobel Prize if I am ever awarded it — because I don’t want to be in the same category as the likes of Al Gore and Barack Obama.

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tiredofitall December 21, 2011 at 15:29

“That’s seriously bizarre. In what sense is marriage hard to exit for a woman?” – Bob Smith

She doesn’t get a big party and a chance to play “queen for a day” like she did when she got married.

I guess getting half of hubby’s stuff must soften the blow a bit though.

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WillPenny December 21, 2011 at 17:29

Has anyone here ever thought of actually promoting feminism. Meaning, start a SpearHead type website for feminists?

Think of all the damage this could do for gender relations!

It may actually be more effective for liberating men, then trying to “awaken” men by MRA, MGTOW, Ghost, etc.

I commend the guys in the manosphere. But I’m thinking, “there has to be a quicker way to finish off what’s left of our decaying society.”

I can think of no faster way than actually doubling-down and brainwashing more younger women and men with Feminist propaganda, and starting at an earlier age too.

The Spearhead might actually me slowing down the progress of men, what with trying to “spread the word.” In actuality, nothing works better than raising another generation of inept people who have no people skills. Less than what the current “iPad” generation has, which from the looks of it is close to none.

But anyway, I think we should be promoting more female oppression around here. We need more whackos posting crazy thoughts, to scare the women into creating more totalitarian rules. Because the only way to really free men, is to collapse the entire system.

Just some happy thoughts.

-WillPenny

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oddsock December 22, 2011 at 11:56

Actually WillPenny. The same has been said quite a few times over the years and on different MRA websites.

Depending on how you see things playing out. It is often opined that we need more feminism not less. Keeping in mind that feminism has inadvertantly freed men far more than women. The more it succeeds the more men sling their hook. I suppose it’s a case of the lesser of two evils. Do we promote it and risk what is left behind ? Can we endure a total feminist society ? Will it collapse? What happens if it doesn’t ?

Lots of ifs buts and maybe’s to consider.

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evilwhitemalempire December 22, 2011 at 22:24

anti-feminist in name only, or AFINOs
****************

Spread the meme far and wide.

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Attila December 25, 2011 at 09:54

Just ignore women — arguing with them only gives them more power.

Walk away, ignore her or wire her mouth shut. And if she attacks you physically-
then file assault charges if there are any traces (bites, broken limbs, bruises).

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Anon-e-mous December 28, 2011 at 17:51

Been married for 22 years. Been faithful to my wife. Seldom drink, don’t do drugs, and am gainfully employed. Make enough money my wife doesn’t have to work as all the bills are covered. She’s filled the house from top to bottom with stuff (neither furniture nor decorations, but stuff) that covers nearly every flat spot in the house. Can’t bring my suit case in the door because of the stuff in the way.

When I get home from traveling (a week or two out on the road doing field service). if I want a meal I cook it. She does wash my clothing but other than that she remains where she was when I left on Monday.

Sex? Given grudgingly if at all. Don’t get a hug or a kiss when I come home from traveling. If I want a hug or a kiss I must initiate it. Asked her many times about this but after this long it is one of those things that really is a lost cause. If we go our separate ways I will never remarry. She’s accused me of being a misogynist for not liking her daughter (foul mouthed 30 yr old). Do I hate women? No, but they’ve caused me incredible amounts of grief and misery over the years.

Might be cheaper and less hard on the soul to get a business manager to take care of bills when traveling than to stay married. This isn’t what I planned on when I got married.

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