Originally posted on A Voice for Men
Every man knows that when answering the question posed in the title that he does so at his own risk.
It’s a typical non question, designed more for adulation on demand than an honest answer.
And you have seen it before, or one of a thousand variations of it, because it’s a universal part of the male experience in dealing with women in relationships.
The general rule is, women ask a question and men search for the “right” answer, or at least for one that will result in as little trouble as possible.
Perhaps illustrating further with a joke will help.
A man and woman are leaving a movie. The woman asks, “Do you think Sigourney Weaver is pretty?”
The guy knows this is potential trouble, but he also knows he has to answer.
“Well, yeah, I guess,” he says, trying not to sound at all enthusiastic. Nothing else is said and the guy feels relieved.
Two weeks later they are in a restaurant having dinner.
“How’s the meatloaf?” she asks.
“A little dry,” he says.
“Well, then,” she says, her tone snide and suddenly hostile, “Maybe you should have had Sigourney Weaver make it for you!”
It’s a funny joke, and might be best left to the realm of humor until you consider that this is how many, many men live their lives; trying their best to not say the wrong thing, even if they have to lie, and constantly being set up with a series of questions for which there is no right answer.
What does it say, one might ask, about a human being when they not only insist on being told what they want to hear, regardless of its truthfulness, but will also, in fact, deal out retribution when given the wrong answers to impossible questions?
I have three words for it.
Complete moral bankruptcy.
Actually, I have three more words that are more accurate.
Spoiled rotten child. That is actually more fitting because we don’t expect children to have the moral development that we would an adult. And nowhere but in modern western culture are we satisfied when women measure up to the moral development of a five year old.
It’s a state of affairs that affects both men and women. But there is a major difference in how and when and why it happens between the two.
First, for a man to have the world around him lying to him for the sake of his over inflated sense of self importance, he has to have a lot of money. You can bet that Donald Trump and Bill Gates have a slew of people around them that would point to a blue sky and call it green if they thought that is what those guys wanted to hear.
But The Donald and Gates represent a very decided minority of men- and they have to pay, literally, for the privilege of being surrounded by obsequious Yes Men.
Any of the rest of men that expect automatic deference, that become childish and punishing when denied agreement or coddling, are rightfully regarded as immature pricks and written off, by men and women alike.
It has to be mentioned though, that there is some reason to question whether the self importance of men like Gates and Trump is all that over inflated. Arrogant and spoiled? No doubt, but they have accomplished incredible things in their lives.
Women, on the other hand, have a much different set of circumstances. All men are Yes Men, or are damned well expected to be, and it costs those women absolutely nothing to realize their expectations; their only qualification for that status is the possession of a vagina. No need to build and empire or revolutionize technology. Just sport the P-nay-nay and the lap dogs will come a yappin’.
You don’t have to look any further than the comments on MRA websites to see what happens when some of us get uppity and start telling the truth, without say so from the Princess Collective.
I can even hear even more of it coming now. Eeewwwwww! That’s so hateful and misogynistic! You’re just frustrated because you can’t get laid!
Sure, cupcake, and I have no doubt you fully expect people to agree with that assessment. Aren’t you entitled to that, as a woman?
I will answer those comments, should they occur, in advance.
First, the truth isn’t hate speech. Never was. Second, if you don’t like the truth, grow the hell up and quit living by a standards that require people to lie. And third, grow the hell up and quit living by standards that require people to lie.
Failing any of this, quit expecting anyone to regard you as an equal. It just doesn’t work that way.
Sheesh, and they say men have fragile egos? Gimme a break.
I often consider all of this when women question me about a gender wage gap that does not exist. Or about the myth that women in this culture were ever oppressed. Or about domestic violence being only committed by men.
And my conclusion is that those questions aren’t really those questions.
Those questions are “Do you think my ass looks fat in this dress?”
Of course, I am supposed to maintain the status quo and give the answer that is expected to those and a litany of other non questions, for fear of getting Sigourney Weaver thrown back in my face. Just as I am supposed to not recognize that such inquiries are really just fishing expeditions from the imagined infallibles that are the fairer sex in modern culture, NAWALT’s notwithstanding.
Unfortunately, I lost interest in the right answers to anything a long time ago, figuring that the best answers are always the truthful ones. That became necessary when I discovered that I could not seek the truth and placate children at the same time.
But it gives women what they have claimed to want for so, so long.
Equal treatment.
After fifty years of endlessly disseminating information on the darker side of masculine nature- information that morphed into the unrestrained male bashing that now pervades modern consciousness, it is fair and just, in the name of equal treatment, that we begin to explore the darker, more destructive side of the feminine as well.
Funny how that does not sit so well with so many of them.
{ 90 comments… read them below or add one }
Many of my married male friends speak of how their lives are just one big capitulation to her whims. “Yes, dear. Yes, dear. You’re right. I’m sorry, I’ll do better next time. Yes, dear. Oh, whatever you want is fine with me.”
Men: Avoid marriage like the Plague. In fact, given the choice, get the Plague. They’ve got antibiotics for that stuff nowdays.
Excellent article Paul and very timely. I’m presently writing 3 separate chapters for the new collective MRM book whose working title is WOMEN ARE FULL OF CRAP!
I’ve completed the chapter titled ALL WOMEN ARE FEMINIST.
I’m working on the chapter titled TWO FACED WOMAN. This discusses the pre-marriage face women use to lure men in and after they get the ring through your nose the gloves come off and the claws come out. And because of this excellent article I’m writing a chapter titled:
SHIT TESTS
It warns men about how to put emotional terrorists in their places. Paul any ideas where I can send the manuscripts?
WOMEN DO NOT BELONG IN THE MRM!
Actually, I believe that Trump and Gates got rid of their yes-men years ago. Separation from reality impairs the business. That’s a great way to lose your money, unless you’re in the government, entertainment or education.
No, it’s your ass that makes your ass look fat.
Beautiful article. My wife always gets the truth when she asks such questions. “How is my butt?” Me: “You need to lose a few more kilos.” Here she usually sulks for maybe half a minute, then she is back to normal.
Recently she has been bringing up Nikki Reed because I said she is beautiful. Well, big deal. She is beautiful. Her: “How is your girlfriend Nikki?” Me: “Hot like always.”
The surest way to unhappiness is to care about what a woman thinks.
So … you’d rather treat women like men than get laid?
I guess your priorities are your priorities, but I think you’re a fucking idiot. The “Do I look fat?” question is just part of the female’s nature, and a Real Man accepts and deals with it.
Fair’s got nothin’ to do with it. Anyone who wants fairness from life is bound to live a long, bitter, miserable life – and no one will show up at your funeral.
Oh my goodness, it only took six comments for some pinhead to tell me how to be a real man.
Christian, come save me, lol!!
But really, Conrad, I am glad you posted. You have revealed one trait common to all manginas- you can’t laid without lying to women or concocting some other phony, servile pretense.
So tell me, what else do you do to get laid? The dishes? Do you tell her she is the most beautiful woman in the world? Say “yes, dear” a lot? Fetch things, etc.?
I pity you. No one needs to lie to women to get laid. That belief is reserved for manginas with no Game.
@ Mac MRM
Can’t wait to see your stuff, man.
Haha. It’s fonny cause it’s true!
What a relief to married men that female coworkers are not like that. On the job women are all straight talk and no complicated games. You don’t need a phd in facial expression reading to understand why they are walking around like they got a stick up their ass.
Wrong answer, so you get a nice green swastika.
Conrad’s next post will be “A Real Man wears a French maid outfit while his wife does him anally with a strap-on! Take it! Taaaake iiiitt!”
Muslim patriarch-You da man
In my dating days, my girlfriends learned early on not to ask me questions like this unless they wanted an honest answer. “Do you think she’s hot?” “For sure, and here’s why … “
Suitable for framing.
Paul I can’t find your name on the writer’s contact list. Can I get an email so I can send you the chapter titled ALL WOMEN ARE FEMINISTS?
WOMEN DO NOT BELONG IN THE MRM!
Sure. [email protected]
Paul this is an easy question to answer. You should get laid every single time your wife askes it!
http://www.marriedmansexlife.com/2010/01/answering-do-these-pants-make-my-ass.html
Al Bundy
“No, it’s your ass that makes your ass look fat.”
Hahaha…… very funny!!
Unfortunately, women’s ( male and female) preference for being told what they want to hear has some serious consequences. Politicians and Spin Doctors know they will take a pretty lie over an ugly truth any day of the week.
LOL! I can’t claim the NAWALT card because… I was like that (not with the Sigourney Weaver/meatloaf type of situation but with fishing for compliments). My husband is not a flatterer so I had to learn not to ask his opinion unless I truly want to hear it!
What is up with that “most beautiful woman in the world” thing?! That aggravated me to no end in my younger years because it’s something my husband would never say! I thought he was missing some special kind of “love lens” that other men saw their wives through, lol. (Actually, I still wonder about that sometimes.)
Paul I beat you to the punch. I went to your site and found that exact address. The book chapter is in you inbox. Now I’m busy writing the the second chapter titled:
TWO FACED WOMAN
to be followed by the third chapter titled:
SHIT TESTS.
WOMEN DO NOT BELONG IN THE MRM!
One of the interesting things about being at an age where getting laid is about as important as reading the fine print on my insurance policy, is that comments like this stand out as total, bitter drivel.
Paul’s article reads well – he’s describing something all authentic men recognize in their own lives – the bullshit bell doesn’t get to ring even once. Not so for you my friend. Your maturer years await you if you are lucky, and the hazing of the mind that so many suffer from due to the great conflict between desire and truth will clear. You won’t even care if nobody shows up to your funeral.
I was just thinking (call out the National Guard!)
Blogs like this are natural book factories. All you do is take what you consider the best threads and compile them into a book. You can even list some of the best responses along with the worst such as when Anna defended the woman who molested the 13 year old boys. That way you can “prove” that women simply don’t “get it.” You would want to include the trolls like Nicole and and Skadi to exhibit how “fair and balanced” women are. Of course the book would have to be slanted a bit to make men look good and women look bad. But that isn’t such a stretch because the majority of women who post here attempt to derail our agenda and dominate the conversation. In the case of this blog the book could be titled something like:
THE BEST OF THE SPEARHEAD: WHAT MEN ARE REALLY SAYING ABOUT WOMEN
I’m just sayin’.
WOMEN DO NOT BELONG IN THE MRM!
*chic noir scratches head*
Uhh, that’s Beyonce. She is wearing a butt pad to make her butt look bigger.
Paul, let chic noir help a “brother” out.
FYI, In African-American culture, a big butt(small waist) is a symbol of beauty.
Fellas, if a blk woman asks you if her butt looks big, the answer is “HELL YEA
” .
Telling a blk woman her butt looks small is a major insult just about the worst thing you can say to her .
*Paul chuckles*
Paul found the pic just like it was by googling the title to the article. Paul doesn’t care about the taste black men have in women’s asses because this isn’t about race.
Black men get just as many dishonest shit tests from their women as whites, and chic noir demonstrates this with a mangina lesson on how to lie to black women.
Paul doesn’t give a flying fuck what women, black or white, want to hear. Paul will say what he believes is true.
Paul rests case.
Paul will say what he believes is true.
well if you tell beyonce that her ass looks fat, you win.
Paul doesn’t care about the taste black men have in women’s asses because this isn’t about race.
*sigh*
Who said it was about race? *because race or culture is mentioned doesn’t make it a “race” issue. You could’ve written this post about telling a Chinesse woman that her skin is pale when her skin is really dark. I, wouldn’t have seen it as a race post.
Just one of those preety little lies men tell women or women request that men tell them. It’s so not a big thing Paul. Just wanted to give you some inside info. Well enough about that.
*chic noir hands Paul a cake*
Here, I made this for you & the guys cause the cupcakes didn’t go over so well.
*chic noir avenger the side eye*
have a nice day fellas
*chic noir walks out and shuts the door behind her*
Excellent article Paul, thank you.
@Conrad Blackburn
http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/spineless.shtml
Afternoon gents. Chic Noir is all of 23 or 24 yrs old. I do apologize on her behalf. She just doesn’t know any better. She thinks a little eye-lash flutter and online flirt is great, and doing us all a favor.
*sigh*
It ain’t workin, babe. Please go flirt somewhere else.
@ chic noir
“Who said it was about race?”
You did. Now please take Tim’s advice.
Al Bundy, you beat me to it! Damn!
Bullshit. My mother pulled this stuff all the time and I always thought it was freakin’ idiotic. Throwing tantrums and storming out of the room if my father answered that yes, some actress or singer was pretty. I guess he was supposed to run after her and declare his undying love. I’d see him sitting there just shaking his head. Even at 10 years old I knew it was manipulative cruel bullshit. Wake up.
People, this is where you guys need to get more savvy about Game.
This is a very textbook test the woman is giving you. If you simply tell her that she is flawless, you are a loser.
This is a great chance to give her a funny yet subtle neg.
For example :
“It is about the same as before” (non-committal answer)
“That depends….” (let her hamster do the rest)
“Let me do a squeeze test before I decide” (say it in a cocky/funny way)
The reason the MRM is so minimal today, is that it takes too defeated and negative of a stand. Game is the answer for doing much better when posed with questions like these.”
Why bother? One young woman on another board said something similar, ‘Even though I know it’s not true, I would want my man to tell me that I’m the most beautiful woman in the world’.
Why? What is so attractive about these ‘little lies’ that make them ‘enjoyable’? DH and I have a ‘warts and all’ policy LOL no sugarcoating or other BS. That kind of thing makes me squirm. It’s a barrier to honest communication. It’s false. I have no objections to him telling me that a particular skirt or pair of pants doesn’t look good, he’s telling me for my own good.
‘Shit tests’ are just that.
Another good answer….
“eh…. doggy style is not as much fun as it was when we first did it.”
@ Tim:
And this is an excuse how?
The infantilization of America marches on…
@ TFH
In all honesty, this is where I see Lame, not Game.
Answer 1. OK, at least it’s the truth.
Answer 2. Avoiding the question- weakness
Answer 3. Same as answer 2
Here’s my answer: You are a grown woman, you don’t need me to tell you how big your ass is.
How’s that for a neg? And true to the last word.
My point here is that in your “Game” version of answers, you are still obliged to make believe that it is not a shit test; you are still playing her Game, not yours. You are doing, no matter how much you try to disguise it, a dance around her music.
Why do this at all?
It doesn’t yield any more benefit than being honest. And if the goal is sexual access, which is really fucked up if that is the case, it doesn’t work any better than just trashing them with the truth.
There are three traits I’ve pretty much come to expect from women at some point:
1) they tend to be passive aggressive much as a child holding things back and acting deceitfully when it suits them.
2) they never forget any perceived slight whether real or imagined – once they get their panties in a bunch it becomes a Gordian knot that cannot be undone
3) in general, they tend to be narcissists.
I think that the best policy is to tell it like it is.
Do not lie. Always be upfront. No bull shit. No need to be rude, be always upfront.
If you don’t give bullshit answers, she will eventually trust you and the next time you make her a compliment she will believe you.
“Does that dress make my butt look fat” is, I think, a shit test. If you lie, you fail.
And if her ass indeed looks big in that dress, you may as well assume that she knows it. So, why lie?
If you guys haven’t checked out Paul’s website lately, you should. He has been kicking a lot of ass with his excellent articles.
cruella ‘Even though I know it’s not true, I would want my man to tell me that I’m the most beautiful woman in the world’.
I personally have never been one to throw a fit or ask a man “is my butt fat” cause I know my butt’s big and round for my frame and I like it that way.
I’m also not one to have a fit if my man finds another woman attractive. I just to teast a former boyfriend about his crush on Kenya Moore. It was something we could laugh about togeather.
I’ve always felt that my manfriend wouldn’t be with me if he didn’t like the way I look. *but I do enjoy compliments, why not. People are going to talk about you anyway, so it’s nice when they have good things to say and when they don’t… oh well haters gonna hate.
By the way, Sigourney Weaver is sixty years old.
I’ve never had a female ask me this, perhaps because they’re all slim and young. But I’ve never had any shit tests either. It may be due to the fact that I’m easily old enough to be their father ( I don’t even talk to older females anymore) and they know I’m 5 moves ahead of anything they can do or say.
Vanity is unisex, both men and women like the other sex to tell them how sexy they are to them.
For the people that made comments about how they cut down others asking for a compliment, when’s the last time you heard someone call your dick a pencil and you rationalized that they were just telling you the truth.
I’ve always been thin and tall, mid forties now and I’m starting to thicken around the middle. My wife who had always loved that I had in her words “the body of a twenty something cyclist” now says that she loves that I’m broadening out, getting bigger shoulders, etc.
If you love someone why wouldn’t you love them? It amazes me to hear how people treat the people who they are closest to worse then total strangers.
Having said that. My wife and I shop together for clothing, she does not believe the sales clerks when they tell her something looks good she believes me.
” What is so attractive about these ‘little lies’ that make them ‘enjoyable’? DH and I have a ‘warts and all’ policy LOL no sugarcoating or other BS. That kind of thing makes me squirm”
Ah, Crella… One man’s meat is another man’s poison.
“People are going to talk about you anyway, so it’s nice when they have good things to say and when they don’t… oh well haters gonna hate.”
Yes, Chic. True dat
I,I,I…We weren’t talking about you, but shit tests in general.
Kathy, I suppose so, but when used to bait etc as in Welmer’s example, it’s not good.
“Here’s my answer: You are a grown woman, you don’t need me to tell you how big your ass is.”
Paul – this answer pretends that you are speaking to an adult when in fact you are speaking to a woman (there is a big difference). Woman on the whole are grossly more immature then men in many ways we just are supposed to pretend this isn’t true for the sake of … of…. well for the sake of once again not offending the noisy class.
“How’s that for a neg? And true to the last word.”
It is a negative but it doesn’t help you and will only make home life harder if you choose to live with a woman. Game works, this is a fact. And it works because it is designed to prey upon the following things:
* a woman’s self centeredness
* a woman’s immaturity
* a woman’s lack of honesty and moral restraint
* a woman’s propensity to justify her feelings using intellectual arguments while pretending that just because she feels something – that it is valid when most of the time it is not
Why doesn’t game work on men? Because most of us are not proud little aspiring Caesar’s who must lick the boots of those we believe to be better than ourselves. Women do this, it is at their core. It is why very nice guys with great qualities (such as honesty and humility) lose out to social outcast thugs with low intelligence and no work ethic. Mr. Good Guy will present himself in a humble fashion to the girl and because he is trying to be humble (a universal virtue in every religion) she will “move on” because she perceives she is better than him. The thug however – he treats her like crap (he treats everyone like crap) so she jumps into bed with him because she perceives him as above her and therefore worthy of her trough. You’ll also notice who occupies the center of the universe in this model. Everything is based on how it stacks up against HER using HER false and always unchecked perceptions and assumptions. Men don’t work this way. The mature man seeks a standard by which to measure the universe outside of himself as he realizes that his own perceptions may sometimes be faulty. Woman NEVER do this.
“My point here is that in your “Game” version of answers, you are still obliged to make believe that it is not a shit test; you are still playing her Game, not yours. You are doing, no matter how much you try to disguise it, a dance around her music.”
This is true but since shit tests are like rain you must assume they will happen. Expecting a woman not to do this would involve (honestly) forbidding her to speak EVER with immediate and violent consequences if she disobeys. ALL women do this, it is in their natures. That is one of the chief flaws of the MRM’s. Most are absolutely furious at the inconsistencies, the shit tests, the drama, the completely illogical behavior, the embrace of things and people that are clearly detrimental to a woman’s long term well being, without really digesting the fact that it *is* these things that make women women. Maybe the resentment is coming from the fact that many of us were brought up to believe that women were these lily white super moral beings of goodness and charity and somewhere there is a very angry being inside of us that rages against this lie and the society that continues to perpetuate such stupid filthy garbage. Women will never be the mature soul mates we want, they will and always have been the shit testing, trampy, spoiled little children we see today. The only difference is years ago, it wasn’t illegal to curb these obviously destructive habits when they surface. Now such is “oppression”.
“Why do this at all?”
Because like it or not you will encounter shit tests. If you won’t to be around women (and they do have their good points) it helps to navigate these waters to YOUR advantage. Remember you are not doing either of you any favors by just getting angry about this anymore than a woman who persecutes her husband for having a hobby she doesn’t like. You’ll get these questions – this bullshit is at the center of a woman’s soul. They are children, treat them as such and children can be great to have around. Undisciplined however and they become terrors. Terrors with the society and law enforcement presumed platinum class citizenship package. “Yep! You certainly could lose a few!” then go back to the game on TV.
“It doesn’t yield any more benefit than being honest. And if the goal is sexual access, which is really fucked up if that is the case, it doesn’t work any better than just trashing them with the truth.”
On these points you are incorrect. You should be honest in a dominant way and she’ll love you for the abuse (what a man would see as abuse) and heap sex upon you for your efforts. Given that this kind of crap is what makes up ALL women you only other choice is misery at home or solitude.
The only two with sense here are Paul and the Muslim. Cease caring what a woman thinks. She will think something completly opposite soon enough. Getting laid? Just about every woman in the west will open her legs, if she believes it will result in access to resources.
Every woman has a price. Be sure you read the tag before you indulge.
Questions like that simply mean are you a free man or a willing slave.
Customers ask similar questions of a business.
or a boss of a employee.
or a master of a slave.
You know, tell me what i want to hear or you are in the shit.
A truly free person always speaks there mined.
Migu: “Just about every woman in the west will open her legs, if she believes it will result in access to resources. ”
But, what about the woman who loves her man and who loves having sex with him, Migu?
Isn’t that enough?
Contrary to what some may say, that IS enough for some women.
It’s enough for me.
And… NO!! Don’ t have any flash jewellery or clothes or shoes. Those things just do not interest me.
Had more money than hubby when I married him.
Stay at home and look after the kids, now. Do a little work for our business at home. Happy as a lark.
I’m a kept woman..( In a manner of speaking) And.. loving it
“Stay at home and look after the kids, now. Do a little work for our business at home. Happy as a lark.”
In other words, your husband’s resources support you. He brings most of the paycheck.
You are not a counterexample to the Migu statement. The counterexample would be a woman who supports economically her husband (not only in time of crisis but in a regular basis). There are some of these women but they are incredibly rare.
Not that women are guilty of wanting material compensation for their sex and reproductive ability. They are wired that way. Evolutionary psychology explains this and it is true for the females of most animal species.
@ remorhaz
With all respect, I find nothing at all of viable substance in your ideas, and the core of that assessment boils down to the following two very important exchanges.
First:
This is where you completely miss the point, and a reminder for me that I need to finish my series on Zeta Game.
A general rule in life is that people get what they tolerate and enable. Now I agree that no matter how much you refuse to enable shit tests from women, they will come, to one degree or another. But I can also tell you that in most cases, when they are rejected out of hand from the moment they start, each and every time (which is a training process to straighten women out) they will, in fact, decrease in frequency and intensity.
With my last partner of any length, I was able to get to the point that when she would say or ask something really stupid- aka shit test, I would just look at her directly in the eyes and say nothing. It would register with her and she would lower her eyes and walk off.
There was no shortage of sex there, either.
But the next part in your explanation is pure fatal flaw, and in my opinion, a totally mistaken mentality to approach a relationship with a woman with.
You say:
Don’t take this personally. I am not inferring this to you and your life, but that, as I read it, is a pussy mentality.
First, living by your values and demanding rigorous honesty of yourself can be tough, but in the end it always makes your life easier.
No woman can make my life harder. I can take whatever retribution they try to dish out and put it right back in there faces tenfold without my pulse going up 1 bpm- without changing anything in my day at all.
Your position assumes that you are giving women power to make your life harder! Sorry, but why the fuck would you do that?
From the moment you start “Gaming” with the intent of coping with, and compensating for, women’s neurotic shit, then you have failed, IMO.
It doesn’t make your life easier unless you are a man who cannot or will not live with rigorous honesty and by your own values.
And to me, that is what GAME, as it is commonly practiced, is- a learned set of behaviors for men who don’t have the integrity to embrace principled living and insist on it guiding their actions with men and women alike.
I know it works to get pussy, and perhaps to placate princess here and there, but easier or more effective than just plain old direct honesty?
Never in a million years. That is a pipe dream.
Consider your list:
All of these things are much more easily managed by the rigid application of truthfulness and other good values than in scheming plan (which only matches her dishonesty).
Take your bullet point about a woman’s maturity.
When a woman tries to argue with me like a child, I tell her once, “The only way you will get me to listen to a single word you have to say is to present it like a rational adult. It’s not negotiable.”
And then I follow through, hell or high water, even if it means she leaves.
Why? Because one of my values is that I don’t argue with a child while playing make believe that it is an adult. No adult. No audience from me.
It shuts down fights quickly and effectively, because I follow through, and results in less effort on my part. It also helps women as many of them figure out when they calm down and think about things that the part of them that can temporarily mimic maturity often sees that there really wasn’t a problem to begin with.
Men don’t need Game, not like this, IMO. What they need is a set a values that they would rather eat broken glass than give up to a woman.
Does This Dress Make My Ass Look Fat?
If a woman were to ask me this question, it is apparent she already knows it does.
Robert, you’re the most elusive person around. I left you a post about my two books. Look at the “Are women good at anything?” thread Aug 14, 2010 at 08:51. Go their immediately.
OT: I’m going to use my WDNBITMRM post script until Wednesday Aug 18th. Don’t ask why. I’m weird that way.
WOMEN DO NOT BELONG IN THE MRM!
Robert, you are correct sir! And if she knows it looks good she will flaunt it without asking for your input.
But even if she has a great ass, on occaision she will be self-concious and ask that question.
Correct responses :
“Not at all, you look great! The other bitches will hate you. We need to go now.”
- or -
“Maybe a different blouse would balance your ass. Here let me help you.”(select another blouse for her, put it on) “Aw, bitch, shit, you look hot!” (Yank up her dress, pull down her panties, bend her over, rogure her something rude until you are both sweaty and stank of pussy, then go to the party or PTA meeting or whatever)
Hey, not trying to sound like Johnny Wadd Jr., just an old guy relating what works. There are other tactics for this scenario, such as :
“Put something else on! Why do gotta dress like a little whore? I don’t want other men staring at your ass!” (Yank up her dress, pull down her panties, bend her over, rogure her something rude until you are both sweaty and stank of pussy, then go to the party or PTA meeting or whatever)
MacArthur Of The MRM August 15, 2010 at 08:27
Robert, you’re the most elusive person around. I left you a post about my two books. Look at the “Are women good at anything?” thread Aug 14, 2010 at 08:51. Go their immediately.
OT: I’m going to use my WDNBITMRM post script until Wednesday Aug 18th. Don’t ask why. I’m weird that way.
WOMEN DO NOT BELONG IN THE MRM!
Thanks, I copied the titles of your books. I ‘ll be seeking them out. If I seem elusive, it is because I am tired, during/after work. Also, I am fairly new to the MRM. There is so much I need and want to learn. I have been looking for books and materials in the book stores here to use as I seek to enrich myself and become a highly effective member of the MRM and a Counter-feminist agent of change. I don’t have any credit cards, I pay cash for everything so buying anything online is no option. I have no shame in saying I visit this site at least six times a day to learn what I can.
Uncle Elmer, you have some wild and interesting ideas. I may be fourty-five but, I’m still alive and , young men reading this post; I do not need or use viagra. Age is just a number and I am keeping it “real”.
Came straight here after reading and composing the following.
Another good PE essay. Keep’em coming. Somebody has to say those things written in this finely worded post. It is long over-due. People will have to sart getting used to this. Those not accustomed to such plain forthright speech would rail against it as ‘miz-o-ginn-ist-ik’. Inserting the phrase “grow-up” is hereafter a required rejoinder to such spineless subterfuge.
“I can even hear even more of it coming now. Eeewwwwww! That’s so hateful and misogynistic! You’re just frustrated because you can’t get laid!”
– Huh. Sure. There’s laws against having sex with children, honey. Go away. Where are the “real women”?
“P-nay-nay and the lap dogs will come a yappin’. You don’t have to look any further than the comments on MRA websites to see what happens when some of us get uppity and start telling the truth, without say so from the Princess Collective.
Sheesh, and they say men have fragile egos? Gimme a break.”
– I agree, many times a man’s “ego” is based upon what he has accomplished or is expected to. I’ve observed over the years that female ‘ego’ appears based upon what nature, or conception, had provided for her, something she obviously never worked for, or based on that internal dialogue stream of mutually exclusive non-sequiturs. Or the combination of both.
One of the intended consequences of feminism has been the created animosity between the sexes. This makes for another sub-division of the population. People working against each other’s mutual benefit and that of their respective nations. But, way back the femi-girlies started repeating the endless false accusations with little provable truth as back-up. The men’s movement has proven YOU/feminist wrong countless times and many times to come yet you still continue draining mens’ pockets and making asses of yourselves. If you had any working brains you would be ashamed of yourselves. Real grown-up women not focussed on fairy tales and are welcome in my court.
“Do you think my ass looks fat in this dress?”
– Here’s an example of how I once handled that question.
“Do you remember during the Olympics when that Russian hurdler had her sex challenged” (this was the days before steroids testing, for you younger readers), I asked.
That ‘losing control’ look appeared on her face, “Uh, yes I do”, was the reply, not knowing where this was going.
“Well, the ‘Olympic committee’ discovered that, yes, she was a woman, afterall”, came my responce.
Totally perplexed she asked, “What has that got to do with what I asked you?”
“The ‘Olympic committee’, I continued, “ruled that she was technically female but wasn’t producing enough estrogen to be considered a woman and took her out of competition with other females. You see, a woman has to have a certain amount of body fat in order to produce estrogen to be fertile. So, all women have to be fat to be considered a woman.”
An odd look, complete silence and a walk-away was what I got over this. She tried again later but I merely repeated that last sentense you see quoted just above, plus, adding that I’d like to see it again later, up-stairs. We both ended up getting what we wanted but I worded it slightly different that third time around.
Robert, don’t forget that I’m offering you a free copy of my anti-feminist book, “How To Train Your Woman.” Just leave me your email address so I can get a home address to send it to. This book is the most volatile, take no prisoners book in the manosphere. Contact me.
WOMEN DO NOT BELONG IN THE MRM!
Just finished reading the comments here above.
M-a-a-a-n, many of these comments way are better than comedy club material.
Only the internet (ahem…, plus the SH and AVFM) could have allowed for this to occur without that controlling interference.
Uhh, you’ve read the following a few times from me in the past. But, IF the ‘net gets shut down or censored where do we go for more of the same we participate in/with here? (Don’t answer. Get to know people in your area to talk to about these kinds of things if the lights go out).
To “conrad blackburn”
– Regardless of what the real Conrad allegedly did or who he appears to be, his “National Post” newspaper was the first coast-to-coast daily to offer consistent critical coverage of feminism during the 1990s. (because of this and as a joke, I vault this man to sainthood. please do not use his name in vain).
– I believe the author,PE, of the orignal post above not only identified the no-win situation that leads to unnecessary ‘relationship’ tensions but revealed its origins and solutions.
We could all benefit from the examples of both men. We had been stifled from talking about such matters for far too long. Your ‘letter to the editor’ misses the mark.
MacArthur Of The MRM August 15, 2010 at 10:34
Robert, don’t forget that I’m offering you a free copy of my anti-feminist book, “How To Train Your Woman.” Just leave me your email address so I can get a home address to send it to. This book is the most volatile, take no prisoners book in the manosphere. Contact me.
WOMEN DO NOT BELONG IN THE MRM!
[email protected]
My unit has the nickname “vipers”. My name; Oxyuranus microlepidotus
Conrad Blackburn wrote”
“I guess your priorities are your priorities, but I think you’re a fucking idiot. The “Do I look fat?” question is just part of the female’s nature, and a Real Man accepts and deals with it.”
So you’re saying it’s an inescapable and unchangeable female characteristic to lie and manipulate?
Boy oh boy, just wait until until whoever she is finds out what you really think.
So, what of guys who, like me, refuse to be a lying (lying NEVER helps anyone grow as a lover or as a person) yes-man, yet still manage to have a prosperous marriage (in my own case) and a happy wife?
I don’t know what forces were guiding me, but those many years ago, when was still dating my wife, I flat-out told her that I’m not into making smarmy compliments, so if she gets one she really deserves it.
Result?: if she thinks she looks fat, or wants to fish for a compliment, she won’t even bother with asking a stupid question like “Do I look fat?”
Your assertion that Real Men accept lying and manipulation as part of what has to be dealt with certainly explains, at least partially, why feminism has been able to veer off into such ugliness of late.
It’s amazing how many men, including myself, resist the truth. And then when it hits them, they realize they’ve been complete retards and start training their women.
Never retreat; never apologize; always call out BS when it happens. Don’t be afraid of leaving.
Your relationships will improve immensely from day one.
Paul Elam,
How’s that for a neg? And true to the last word.
It is certainly better than jumping at her command, but it is still rather brusque, rather than the dominant/teasing vibe which is the most optimal.
Along the same lines of what you wrote, but less harsh would be ”
“If you have to ask me the question, you already know the answer.”
Her hamster will do the rest of the work.
“In other words, your husband’s resources support you. He brings most of the paycheck”
Yes, because that is what he wanted. I have done as he wished, and it has worked out very well.
I make him breakfast, lunch, and cook the evening meal. I keep house, look after the kids and…… provide him with regular sex.In other words whenever he wants it. To be fair, I get it whenever I want it too
“You are not a counterexample to the Migu statement. The counterexample would be a woman who supports economically her husband (not only in time of crisis but in a regular basis).”
Sheesh, fins, of course I support hubby financially on a regular basis.
I am part owner of our business. If I didn’t pay the wages on a regular basis we’d have no one working for us. Lol.. That’s apart from the bookkeeping, making up orders, and dealing with clients on the phone.
I see my role as a supportive one. I am not the brains or the brawn of the outfit, which is why I play down my role . My husband designs and builds patios and decks. ( He also supplies materials such as polycarbonate sheeting and special screws to a few companies)
My main role is as wife and mother.
@ TFH
Nah, I’d rather say, “You’re a grown women, you don’t need me to answer what you already know.”
Saves me from having to do it over and over in the future.
Your way is too much work, and, IMO, too dishonest.
I don’t think that men should ever deal cordially with emotional terrorists who dish out shit tests. They’re deliberately insulting you so you should always be offended. If a woman asks me “Does this dress make my ass look fat?” I would answer, “What kind of stupid question is that. Is this a set up?” If she starts a flame war I’d just walk away. And I wouldn’t offer any apologies later because I didn’t do anything wrong. If you find yourself constantly trying to “keep the peace” then you have no peace to speak of.
Now I have to get busy writing the third chapter to the MRM book titled WOMEN ARE FULL OF CRAP. This chapter is titled SHIT TESTS.
The reason women’s egos are so wrapped up in appearance is because they have so little else of relevance to contribute to society. Outer beauty and appealing to men, IS their value. Otherwise, it would be normal to see women doing amazing things, like men do. If feminists could somehow get young girls to subvert puberty, they’d have a better chance of proving they were right all along. As Sally Ride said regarding getting girls intersted in science, “For some reason, right around 13 or 14 we lose them.”
Mmmm…
Kathy or whoever responded to me. Thanks you proved my point and listed your price.
Like I said every woman has one. Make sure you know what’s on the price tag. I’ll point it out for the girls. Not all prices are in money.
I’ll probably get a crap load of responses to this question (perhaps this question could inspire Welmer to do an articel about it). Here goes.
Why are “shit tests” necessary?
“Good idea. Blame it on the dress.” — Sam Malone, Cheers
yeah, it’s all in where you put the emphasis…
“The dress DOES NOT make your ass look fat.”
“THE DRESS does not make your ass look fat.”
“Does This Dress Make My Ass Look Fat?”
If she’s asking this, you’ve stayed with her too long.
Should have DTB’ed her fat ass long ago.
Also, the premise of this question being asked can only happen when:
1) You’re living with her.
or
2) You went shopping with her for her clothes.
Both events should not have happened.
So, don’t let it happen.
If you can live without women, that is the ideal case.
Otherwise, play around with them , but don’t marry them, don’t cohabit, and don’t get serious.
“In other words, your husband’s resources support you. He brings most of the paycheck”
Yes, because that is what he wanted. I have done as he wished, and it has worked out very well.
Well, it could very well be this way. But this does not disprove my point about you not being a counterexample of Migu statement.
I make him breakfast, lunch, and cook the evening meal. I keep house, look after the kids and…… provide him with regular sex.In other words whenever he wants it. To be fair, I get it whenever I want it too
If all these services (except sex) were outsourced, they would be done by a woman without education (an illegal immigrant) and earning the minimal wage. Hence, the resources your husband bring to the table are higher than the ones you bring.
I see my role as a supportive one. I am not the brains or the brawn of the outfit, which is why I play down my role . My husband designs and builds patios and decks. ( He also supplies materials such as polycarbonate sheeting and special screws to a few companies)
Hey, I am not here to judge you. In fact, I guess that, if my gf and I get married, she will have the supportive role and I will bring most of the bacon. I am not here to trash stay-at-home moms or moms with a part-time job.
You disagreed with Migu’s assertion. Maybe he is wrong but I don’t think you are an example of “not caring about the resources of a man”. Women are wired to care about resources. (Not that there is anything wrong about that). It is only that you think you are an exception, when you are not.
If you brought more resources than your man to the table, you could be an exception to the rule. There are women like that (my sister is one of them) but they are incredibly rare.
@Robert: “Why are “shit tests” necessary?”
One theory is that women use them to gauge whether a man is more likely to be a pack mule/paycheck or a source of suitable sperm for her eggs. In the parlance of Gamers- to distinguish alpha men from beta men (quote: “What women want are beta bucks and alpha f**ks.”). They are a way of HER getting YOU to demonstrate lower value (Tell me a flattering lie! Hold my purse! Buy me a drink! Get on your knees, offer me gold and diamonds, and beg for the privilege of supporting me for the rest of my life! Pretend my emotionally-based drivel makes sense and agree with me! . . . or you won’t get laid). Men in the pan-Anglosphere have largely been conditioned to take the self-lowering approach, and have been basically brainwashed into believing this will improve their chances with women.
“Kathy or whoever responded to me. Thanks you proved my point and listed your price.
Like I said every woman has one. Make sure you know what’s on the price tag. I’ll point it out for the girls. Not all prices are in money.”
Would you mind clarifying this statement for me Migu?
You said earlier Migu, “Just about every woman in the west will open her legs, if she believes it will result in access to resources. ”
The reason I married was for love and SEX. When my first marriage ended, I despaired of finding someone to love and to have sex with. ( I am a practicing Catholic) Fortunately my marriage was subsequently annulled. Shortly after I met and fell in love with the man who was to be my husband. Although we did have sex when we were engaged it did not sit well with my conscience.
I guess you could say that love and sex was my price tag. So in that sense you would be right.
Don’t we ALL have a price tag, then?
“Is Sigourney Weaver pretty?”
“She’s beautiful! I like strong women.”
“Great! I know what kind of women to set you up with.”
“I wouldn’t mind a threesome.”
“Sure, if we can have a threesome with a guy as well.”
The conversation goes a bit differently if you’re polyamorous. It would mean you’re more open to your woman sleeping with other people, but you would get to sleep with other women too.
Just tell her the truth. My wife cooks quite well, but if she has done something I don’t like, I now tell her. She may moan about it, but she usually fixes it the next time. Remember, she works for you, not you for her.
Are you not capable? You know what a trade is yes?
Kathy,
It’s amazing you don’t even see it.
Wait, no it is not. You are woman all is right as long as it feels so.
A practicing catholic you say? Well, my dear you are still married to your first husband.
Have you received an annulment? If not, you are living in sin and adultery.
Have you taken communion while in this state? If so you are going to hell.
Not even a confession will absolve this. You see, God forgives, but you have to be sorry and own up.
Oh yes, I am from a long line of catholics, You are not an adherent my dear. You are one of the Vatican II liberalized women firster Catholics. Ratzinger is working on it honey.
Polyandrous behavior is matriarchy. Fine if you choose so, just know what you are getting into, and should you force it upon a patriarchy, well TFH has already predicted it. Good luck is all I can say.
Missed the annulment part. Of which sect did the priest belong?
It pays to read the full comment before going off half cocked, eh , Migu.
Damn good shaming language, though. I gotta hand it to you
Later gator .
If Kathy got an annulment, she was free to marry. Like me, she is an Australian, and the Church does not hand out annulments as freely here as in America.
I know Kathy a bit from Internet discussions, and she is a good girl. She is a support to her husband and is a serious Catholic.
Migu, Ratzinger might be working on it, but I wish he would get a wriggle on. He could have started by sacking that idiot papal preacher who said women don’t have to obey their husbands any more. At least Ratzinger is an improvement on Wotyla. Now he WAS a pedestaliser.
Huh. So what does it (the article) say about a woman who fails other women’s “shit tests”? Unfortunately for me, I’ve actually lost quite a few friendships for what I call an “unfortunate lack of tact,” but I figure, if someone asks me a question, I’m going to give them the answer – if it isn’t the answer they liked, they shouldn’t have asked the question – further, if it ruined the friendship because of it, it just goes to show how much they valued the friendship. Too true though that this shit test thing is now rampant among women, just don’t think it is excluded to men being the recipients of it. As a matter of pure experiment for anyone who may be used to PC talk around women, they should try the “brutal honesty” approach for a week, I’m sure they would find the results enlightening.
You brought up catholicism. I pointed out violations. Shame, hardly.
Your double standards are still apparent. Plus practicing catholics marry for children, not Love and Sex.
Audios though.
“Plus practicing catholics marry for children, not Love and Sex.”
This one didn’t!
Your turn
Hi David. How’s it going?
I miss your honest and straightforward comments from Alte’s (now defunct) blog.
Hi Kathy
I miss Cecilia’s blog. I had a few emails from her, but she has now “gone ghost”. She did post recently at The Thinking Housewife, under the name Vanessa, but got miffed with her, and I have heard nothing much since. We were only briefly in email contact, and this was after she closed her blog.
I have a suspicion my wife might have seen one of her emails and “seen her off”. She is protective like that. But she swears she didn’t. In any case, I liked Cecilia, but not like that … In all the time I was on Cecilia’s blog, I only got turned on (a little) twice. Something you wrote, and another lady. But Cecilia was “just mates”.
I am now posting as David Collard all over the Manosphere, and still being pretty frank. This is not my real name of course. I have posted as David, David C and now David Collard.
Migu, I am a Traditional (Latin Mass) Catholic. What are you? Catholics have sex for unitive as well as procreative purposes.
a good response is ” why is that important for you to know” ?
Be honest! I don’t think I can stress that enough because this is a great litmus test for the rest of the prospective relationship. Not every woman is going to ask for your opinion on her purchases (or the girl in the movie, etc) because she wants continual affirmation, some genuinely want your opinion, and wouldn’t it be nice to know which kind you’re dealing with before you’re living together, pregnant or married – while you still have the option of NOT dealing with it?
I know I can’t be the only woman in the world that values my husband’s (and before he was my husband, my boyfriend’s) opinion on my appearance above all others. If I ask him if what I’ve selected is too short/tight/etc or if I’ve gained weight or whatever, it’s because I genuinely desire and value his opinion – I want to make sure I’m still attractive to him, and want to make sure I’m not making myself too attractive to others when I go out. If he tells me he doesn’t like something, I pick something else, no drama, because I’d rather not be 75 pounds down the road to fatville wondering why we never have sex anymore or dealing with unwanted attention because I didn’t realize that I’d presented myself in an outfit that attracts said attention. And who better to tell me how others will view me when I go out and what is attractive for inside the home than the person I’m trying to attract?
I’m not saying be deliberately cruel here, but a “yes, you have gained some weight, want to start jogging together/start eating better” or “yes, that skirt is too tight and or short, and doesn’t make you look your best, maybe you should try something like this…” goes a long way. I’ve never found any study to refute the fact that honest communication is essential to a good relationship, and inversely any relationship based on lies is a ticking time bomb. Just understand that this is reciprocal, so if you start to lose the battle of the bulge, and she gently suggests some cardio, be receptive.
(BTW – We are not in the do-no-wrong honeymoon phase, we just celebrated our 8th anniversary earlier this month.)
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